--
-- Host: localhost    Database: lhc
-- ------------------------------------------------------


--
-- Table structure for table `lh_chat`
--

CREATE TABLE `lh_chat` (
  `id` bigint(20) NOT NULL AUTO_INCREMENT,
  `nick` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `status` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `status_sub` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `status_sub_sub` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `time` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `user_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `hash` varchar(40) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `referrer` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `session_referrer` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `chat_variables` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `remarks` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `ip` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `dep_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `invitation_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `sender_user_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `product_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `pnd_time` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `cls_time` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `usaccept` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `user_status` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `user_closed_ts` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `support_informed` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `unread_messages_informed` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `reinform_timeout` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `last_op_msg_time` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `has_unread_op_messages` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `unread_op_messages_informed` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `email` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `country_code` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `country_name` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `unanswered_chat` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `anonymized` tinyint(1) NOT NULL,
  `user_typing` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `gbot_id` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `user_typing_txt` varchar(200) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `operator_typing` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `operator_typing_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `phone` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `has_unread_messages` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `last_user_msg_time` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `fbst` tinyint(1) NOT NULL,
  `online_user_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `auto_responder_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `last_msg_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `lsync` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `transfer_uid` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `additional_data` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `user_tz_identifier` varchar(50) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `lat` varchar(10) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `lon` varchar(10) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `city` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `operation` text COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `operation_admin` varchar(200) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `status_sub_arg` varchar(200) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `uagent` varchar(250) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `chat_locale` varchar(10) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `chat_locale_to` varchar(10) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `mail_send` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `screenshot_id` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `wait_time` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `chat_duration` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `tslasign` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `priority` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `chat_initiator` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `transfer_timeout_ts` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `transfer_timeout_ac` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `transfer_if_na` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `na_cb_executed` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `device_type` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `nc_cb_executed` tinyint(1) NOT NULL,
  `cls_us` tinyint(1) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  PRIMARY KEY (`id`),
  KEY `status_user_id` (`status`,`user_id`),
  KEY `unanswered_chat` (`unanswered_chat`),
  KEY `online_user_id` (`online_user_id`),
  KEY `dep_id` (`dep_id`),
  KEY `product_id` (`product_id`),
  KEY `unread_operator` (`has_unread_op_messages`,`unread_op_messages_informed`),
  KEY `user_id_sender_user_id` (`user_id`,`sender_user_id`),
  KEY `sender_user_id` (`sender_user_id`),
  KEY `anonymized` (`anonymized`),
  KEY `has_unread_messages` (`has_unread_messages`),
  KEY `status` (`status`),
  KEY `dep_id_status` (`dep_id`,`status`)
) ENGINE=InnoDB AUTO_INCREMENT=147 DEFAULT CHARSET=utf8mb4 COLLATE=utf8mb4_unicode_ci;

--
-- Dumping data for table `lh_chat`
--

INSERT INTO `lh_chat` VALUES (89,'Jason',2,0,0,1627830999,3,'13cf0230e313b4dc539a2227c7135c1093772bce','//www.scarleteen.com/lhc_web/index.php/chat/start/(theme)/1/(vid)/1f9248fa112f75e266c6/(sound)/1?ses_ref=//www.scarleteen.com/','','','','68.186.255.210',1,0,0,0,1627830999,1627840727,0,1,1627840640,1,0,0,1627840591,0,0,'jj123093@gmail.com','','',0,0,1627840635,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1627840727,0,105247,0,510,1627840624,0,'','America/New_York','0','0','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.3; Win64; x64) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.107 Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,11,3549,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0),(90,'Elise',2,0,0,1627833435,3,'d9e0f1f08f6601b957ca9cab578617f9ede27d8c','//www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=5','//www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=5','','','174.193.154.125',1,0,0,0,1627833435,1627835791,0,0,1627833558,1,0,0,1627833653,0,0,'Availtime99@outlook.com','us','United States',0,0,1627837160,0,'https://www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=5',0,0,'',0,1627835791,0,5449,0,441,1627837160,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','34','-118','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 9; SM-J737V) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/77.0.3865.92 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,198,218,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(91,'Tils',2,0,0,1627834912,1,'d0a743d6837d87bbee22e366dc0ab7e3c7100465','//www.scarleteen.com/','//www.google.com/','','','191.96.227.252',1,0,0,0,1627834912,1627836530,1,0,0,1,0,0,1627836395,0,0,'t.other021@outlook.com','us','United States',0,0,0,0,'The loudness of my orgasms. Sorry this sounds really embarassing. I\'m just worried people will hear. lol. :)',0,0,'',0,1627836530,0,106217,0,462,1627836555,0,'','Europe/London','40','-73','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; Win64; x64) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.115 Safari/537.36','en-GB','',0,0,140,740,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0),(92,'Elise',2,0,0,1627837194,1,'c398cc844572b474618f84b23585ec22644f74eb','//www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=9','//www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=5','','','174.193.159.43',1,0,0,0,1627837194,1627838615,1,0,1627838620,1,0,0,1627838604,0,0,'Availtime99@outlook.com','us','United States',0,0,1627838621,0,'https://www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=4&si',0,0,'',0,1627838615,0,5449,0,503,1627838621,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','34','-118','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 9; SM-J737V) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/77.0.3865.92 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,69,1418,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(93,'Jason',2,0,0,1629041693,3,'20f19847ede101220d6558f24be568b0c0e57eb7','//www.scarleteen.com/our_live_chat_service','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','68.186.255.210',1,0,0,0,1629041693,1629050436,0,1,1629050450,1,0,0,1629050430,0,0,'jj123093@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,1629050445,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1629050436,0,329642,0,581,1629050432,0,'','America/New_York','42','-71','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.3; Win64; x64) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,54,3777,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0),(94,'Tils',2,3,0,1629041890,3,'c2ccd1d75e1f8863e1facf6df75881c4e73b8165','//www.scarleteen.com/our_live_chat_service','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','91.219.236.228',1,0,0,0,1629041890,1629044907,0,1,1629044884,1,0,0,1629044841,0,0,'t.other021@outlook.com','hu','Hungary',0,0,1629044879,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1629044907,0,329898,0,555,1629044876,0,'','UTC','47','19','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; rv:78.0) Gecko/20100101 Firefox/78.0','en-US','',0,0,1323,1667,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0),(95,'Sarah',2,1,0,1629049229,3,'5666aa0d71d3a22cfd39dfd0be1c44fc81a264b2','//www.scarleteen.com/birth_control_bingo_emergency_contraception','','','','73.189.66.80',1,0,0,0,1629049229,1629050539,0,0,0,1,0,0,1629050536,1,0,'donotspam3141@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,0,0,'I don’t know if the insides of the condom touched my vulva when I pulled it out because of the pani',0,0,'',0,1629050539,0,331315,0,583,1629049490,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','37','-122','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (iPhone; 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Android 11; SM-G975U) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,21,3133,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(98,'Lucy',2,1,0,1629238235,4,'c97592cfe30092c68fb181159ef8257649bd0fb3','//www.scarleteen.com/the_scarleteen_tour_bus_a_quick_how_to','//www.google.com','','','82.68.139.54',1,0,0,0,1629238235,1629240038,0,0,0,1,0,0,1629240034,1,0,'Lucylouisebeer@outlook.com','gb','United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern ',0,0,0,0,'',1629240009,4,'',0,1629240038,0,364887,0,668,1629238235,0,'','Europe/London','53','-2','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (iPhone; CPU iPhone OS 14_7 like Mac OS X) AppleWebKit/605.1.15 (KHTML, like Gecko) CriOS/92.0.4515.90 Mobile/15E148 Safari/604.1','en-gb','',0,0,28,86,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(99,'Jennifer ',2,0,0,1629239167,4,'1ce1424568ee6480e1c6001429da697550c0dd0b','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','','174.204.77.219',1,0,0,0,1629239167,1629239279,0,0,0,1,0,0,1629239253,0,0,'MalikSalas7@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,0,0,'',0,0,'',0,1629239279,0,33878,0,665,1629241199,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','48','-123','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 11; SM-G975U) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,60,86,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0),(100,'Jennifer ',2,1,0,1629241234,4,'97bedaefd2ba2bfc47c2cdfd589c5d636a2daf45','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','','174.204.77.219',1,0,0,0,1629241234,1629242534,0,1,1629241558,1,0,0,0,0,0,'MalikSalas7@gmail.com','us','United States of America',1,0,1629241553,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1629242534,0,33878,0,674,1629241548,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','48','-123','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 11; SM-G975U) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,462,131,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(101,'Sara ',2,0,0,1629241665,4,'4c2699c6d7b31307dbc2dd52328d8364096631b7','//www.scarleteen.com/article/politics_relationships_sexual_identity_gender/the_benefits_of_being_vulnerable_with_other_0','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','174.204.77.219',1,0,0,0,1629241665,1629242806,0,0,1629248887,1,0,0,1629242776,0,0,'MalikSalas7@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,1629248888,0,'https://www.scarleteen.com/',0,0,'',0,1629242806,0,33878,0,698,1629248888,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','48','-123','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 11; SM-G975U) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,56,1111,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(102,'nat ',2,0,0,1629496793,4,'13ed433ae7b42f8a5fb9cf7e19de471ff7e53ccc','//www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/is_part_of_my_vagina_hanging_out','//www.google.com/','','','71.225.218.184',1,0,0,0,1629496793,1629497893,0,0,0,1,0,0,1629497887,0,0,'natalie355@yahoo.con','us','United States of America',0,0,0,0,'nope thanks for ur ti',0,0,'',0,1629497893,0,407955,0,727,1629497998,0,'','America/New_York','39','-75','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (iPhone; CPU iPhone OS 12_5_4 like Mac OS X) AppleWebKit/605.1.15 (KHTML, like Gecko) Version/12.1.2 Mobile/15E148 Safari/604.1','en-us','',0,0,38,1094,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(103,'Sara ',2,0,0,1629497485,4,'f5089bb9ea781bd98fca033c2aee7e5d91d14382','//www.scarleteen.com/need_help_now_a_guide_to_scarleteens_direct_services','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','174.246.49.244',1,1,0,0,1629497485,1629497769,0,0,1629500050,1,0,0,1629497639,0,0,'MalikSalas7@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,1629508456,0,'https://www.scarleteen.com/',0,0,'',0,1629497769,0,33878,0,722,1629508456,0,'','America/Los_Angeles','46','-122','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 11; SM-G975U) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.159 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,92,265,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(104,'Wayne',2,0,0,1629500243,4,'dd4b8881de3b44ca74f3091c16716b0e0bb5cf8f','//www.scarleteen.com/glossary','//www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/we_really_liked_anal_sex_but_should_we_do_it_again','','','172.58.219.171',1,0,0,0,1629500243,1629502273,0,1,1629512171,1,0,0,1629500406,0,0,'wayne.mckown55@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,1629512166,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1629502273,0,406385,0,734,1629512164,0,'','America/New_York','42','-71','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 7.0; SAMSUNG SM-J327T) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) SamsungBrowser/14.2 Chrome/87.0.4280.141 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,22,163,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(105,'Jason',2,0,0,1629644212,3,'da84cdcc2715ac20a0cd9add4483ccc998f80fe9','//www.scarleteen.com/our_live_chat_service','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','68.186.255.210',1,0,0,0,1629644212,1629655268,0,0,0,1,0,0,1629652896,0,0,'jj123093@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,0,0,'Either way you\'re chatting with me, I\'m glad that I can communicate with you Ruby! Even though there is uncertainty for you right now, I hope you are able to embrace being Rubytastic this w',0,0,'',0,1629655268,0,432270,0,780,1629652961,0,'','America/New_York','42','-71','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.3; Win64; x64) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.131 Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,17,2881,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0),(106,'marvin',2,0,0,1629644560,3,'0ce8c21c8675f9e2f026d1455cc0c73d355afc76','//www.scarleteen.com/search/google/14%20year%20old%20scandal','//www.google.com/','','','131.226.66.134',1,0,0,0,1629644560,1629646644,0,2,1629644584,1,0,0,1629645764,1,0,'marvinapolonio0828@gmail.com','ph','Philippines',0,0,1629644579,0,'Visitor has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1629646644,0,432331,0,750,1629644580,0,'','Asia/Manila','14','121','0','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; Android 6.0.1; vivo 1610) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/76.0.3809.111 Mobile Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,18,200,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0),(107,'Testing',2,0,0,1629658820,1,'3aa2910f81059ca219a0dafca8c337351b2223b2','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','','79.79.203.73',1,0,0,0,1629658820,1629826979,1,0,1629819895,1,0,0,1629659311,0,0,'test@test.test','gb','United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern ',0,0,1629823099,0,'https://www.scarleteen.com/',0,0,'',0,1629826979,0,150,0,787,1630103506,0,'','Europe/London','53.6833','-1.49768','Wakefield, England','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; 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I don\'t know exactly what is going on for you, but if you are as considerate of me as you are of others and yourself then you can definitely embrace being Rubytastic this',0,0,'',0,1630258196,0,432270,0,986,1630258172,0,'','America/New_York','42.1659','-71.8916','North Oxford, Massachusetts','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.3; Win64; x64) AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko) Chrome/92.0.4515.159 Safari/537.36','en-US','',0,0,12,2035,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1),(115,'Chris',2,0,0,1630365757,4,'dff42d6b711d0155846bdf462bf6d971506223c2','//www.scarleteen.com/our_live_chat_service','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','204.137.233.230',1,0,0,0,1630365757,1630368134,0,0,0,1,0,0,1630368132,0,0,'cvat325@gmail.com','us','United States of America',0,0,1630368101,0,' You to o',0,0,'',0,1630368134,0,83117,0,1059,1630370886,0,'','America/New_York','44.8012','-68.7778','Bangor, Maine','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (iPhone; CPU iPhone OS 14_7 like Mac OS X) AppleWebKit/605.1.15 (KHTML, like Gecko) CriOS/84.0.4147.122 Mobile/15E148 Safari/604.1','en-us','',0,0,30,2375,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1),(116,'test',2,9,0,1630493595,1,'4ef0effa7f23a0fdebe2ace491b2607dc3169fab','//www.scarleteen.com/','','','','90.255.94.217',1,1,0,0,1630493595,1630579018,0,1,1630575529,1,0,0,0,0,0,'test@test.test','gb','United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern ',0,0,1630575524,0,'test has left the chat!',0,0,'',0,1630579018,0,150,0,1064,1630575513,0,'','Europe/London','50.1154','-5.37881','Germoe, England','','','','Mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; 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--
-- Table structure for table `lh_msg`
--

CREATE TABLE `lh_msg` (
  `id` bigint(20) unsigned NOT NULL AUTO_INCREMENT,
  `msg` longtext COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `meta_msg` longtext COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  `time` int(11) NOT NULL,
  `chat_id` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `user_id` int(11) NOT NULL DEFAULT 0,
  `name_support` varchar(100) COLLATE utf8mb4_unicode_ci NOT NULL,
  PRIMARY KEY (`id`),
  KEY `chat_id_id` (`chat_id`,`id`),
  KEY `user_id` (`user_id`)
) ENGINE=InnoDB AUTO_INCREMENT=1845 DEFAULT CHARSET=utf8mb4 COLLATE=utf8mb4_unicode_ci;

--
-- Dumping data for table `lh_msg`
--

INSERT INTO `lh_msg` VALUES (425,'Hi. I\'m Jason. I have questions, but I don\'t always have answers.','',1627830999,89,0,''),(426,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1627831010,89,-1,'Ruby'),(427,'Jason! Hi! Glad you found the new chat system.','',1627831027,89,3,'Ruby'),(428,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1627831053,89,0,''),(429,'I\'m doing all right! Just waking up and getting settled in. It\'s been a while since we\'ve chatted! How are you doing?','',1627831099,89,3,'Ruby'),(430,'I\'m ok. I found out this morning that a cousin I have in New Mexico died. He wasn\'t old. He was probably in his 40\'s, and he was adopted. I haven\'t seen him since I was a kid, but I was sad to hear that news. I don\'t know if my family will end up traveling to go to the funeral.','',1627831334,89,0,''),(431,'I\'m sorry to hear that. How does it land in your body to hear about that family member\'s passing?','',1627831387,89,3,'Ruby'),(432,'He had been diagnosed with schizophrenia, so I feel kind of connected to him because he was probably a very vulnerable person and I feel vulnerable too. It just reminds me of the vulnerability that I feel, and it makes me wonder if people were treating him well. He lived with my dad\'s brother, and my dad has said his brother is mean, so I wonder if my cousin felt accepted or whether or not he was treated well. I feel overwhelmed by the way people treat me, and I wonder if he was overwhelmed.','',1627831754,89,0,''),(433,'Yeah, it sounds like there are some parallels with your ways of being in the world. It makes sense to feel curious about what his life might have been like and if you could have related on some of your experiences with disability services. Have you felt treated well by your family lately?','',1627832017,89,3,'Ruby'),(434,'I\'ve been treated well enough by my family lately. I\'m just kind of generally overwhelmed by the way people treat me. I had submitted a complaint against the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission and received a response to my complaint from the US Department of Health and Human Services two weeks ago. They indicated that the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission has committed two HIPAA violations against me this year and if they receive another complaint they might do an investigation.','',1627832491,89,0,''),(435,'I see, so there\'s no investigation moving forward unless someone else submits a complaint...? How did that feel to hear? Satisfying closure, or still kind of floating in the aftermath?','',1627832642,89,3,'Ruby'),(436,'I had no expectations, but I definitely don\'t feel satisfying closure. I don\'t understand why people treat me the way they do. The lawyer who committed the HIPAA violations used to work for the US Department of Justice focusing on civil rights violations, and this year he committed civil rights violations against me. People treat me like their own rules don\'t apply to me. I resubmitted my HIPAA request to the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission, so I\'ll see if they follow through this time.','',1627833118,89,0,''),(437,'We\'ll see.. it sounds painful to have it be such a drawn-out process. Are you working with your somatic therapist about how this is showing up in your felt sense?','',1627833230,89,3,'Ruby'),(438,'New here and never have done this chat. Is there anybody on?','',1627833435,90,0,''),(439,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1627833633,90,-1,'Ruby'),(440,'Hi Elise! Yep, I\'m here!','',1627833640,90,3,'Ruby'),(441,'Happy to answer any questions you might have.','',1627833653,90,3,'Ruby'),(442,'I\'m not always sure what I\'m feeling a lot of the time, but the somatic therapist has helped me hit my head less so far. My exercise teacher is traveling out to where I am this week. I asked her if she wanted to have supper with me, and she told me she\'s staying with her boyfriend. I\'ve known her over a year and didn\'t know she had a boyfriend, so that made me sad because I can\'t get closer to her. It\'s difficult for me to have romantic relationships because I\'m not sure what I\'m feeling.','',1627833798,89,0,''),(443,'Yeah, it can be painful to want intimacy with someone when you know each other in just a professional context and those boundaries keep the relationship working. Have you had experiences with romance or intimate relationships before?','',1627834373,89,3,'Ruby'),(444,'I\'ve felt close to girls since I was a kid, but I always stayed away from romance. I feel distant from intimacy a lot of the time. I feel like love is something I have to portray because mostly I feel fear. I don\'t have an easy time being romantic because it almost feels unnatural. I feel overwhelmed by the way people treat me and that fear is difficult for me to hide in romantic relationships. I hope I can become a male stripper so I can try to entertain women outside the context of intimacy.','',1627834784,89,0,''),(445,'Hi.\n\nI\'m soon to be moving to my own studio flat at university and I was wondering if I could get some advice regarding masturbating.\n\nIs it still safe to do so?','',1627834913,91,0,''),(446,'ST-Jacob has accepted the chat!','',1627835052,91,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(447,'Hi Tils, Welcome to scarleteen chat!','',1627835098,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(448,'Hi Jacob','',1627835111,91,0,''),(449,'Can I clarify your question? It is usually safe to masturbate in your own place or your own room etc, am I missing anything?','',1627835172,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(450,'Usually it\'s fine. I normally do it in my bathroom.','',1627835197,91,0,''),(451,'It sounds like you\'ve always been connection-oriented, and had that desire for intimacy and safety, but it\'s been hard to know what the \"rules\" or unspoken expectations are to navigate that in a neurotypical society. Do you feel like friendships can be nourishing in the same way that romantic relationships can be?','',1627835246,89,3,'Ruby'),(452,'Cool, so continuing to do it in your new bathroom... Or honestly anywhere in your studio flat if you\'re living alone shouldn\'t be a problem, I\'m guessing. Is there anything in particular you\'re worried would make it unsafe?','',1627835316,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(453,'The loudness of my orgasms. Sorry this sounds really embarrassing. I\'m just worried people will hear. lol. :)','',1627835358,91,0,''),(454,'Ahah, I get it now! So I think that\'s one of those things that living in flats or appartments you find yourself dealing with, sometimes we hear other people having conversations, watching tv, having sex or masturbating but can still respect eachothers privacy enough to not pry.','',1627835512,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(455,'I\'ll add that it does sort of alter our behaviour a little bit too, like we might just automatically be quieter if we\'ve heard a neighbour watching TV we might find ourselves being quieter when masturbating in the knowledge that if we can hear them, they can probably hear us','',1627835583,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(456,'I\'ve known plenty of people in condensed housing situations who get into the habit of putting on music to muffle anything neighbours might here and have a greater sense of privacy','',1627835645,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(457,'Hear*','',1627835653,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(458,'No. The other difficulty with romantic relationships is that I don\'t feel much sexuality most of the time. My body tends to feel empty. The way people treat me just makes me feel emptier. I end up feeling like a sociopath who doesn\'t feel anything for people, although I suspect most people who are called sociopaths actually feel a lot but their feelings become hidden and repressed. People in disability services keep ignoring me. I just end up feeling empty and like no one will relate to me.','',1627835693,89,0,''),(459,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1627835791,90,-1,'Ruby'),(460,'I agree that people who claim not to feel anything just learned somewhere in childhood that it wasn\'t safe to feel their feelings, so got really skilled at repression. It sounds like although it can be painful and complicated, relating to people is really helpful for your nervous system- have you ever wanted to seek out online friendships or relationships?','',1627835964,89,3,'Ruby'),(461,'I didn\'t mean that people who are called sociopaths claim not to feel anything as much as I meant that society claims that certain people don\'t feel anything. I have wanted to seek out online relationships in various ways. That\'s why I talk to you, and it\'s why I\'ve reached out to people in other places. Mostly, I feel afraid. I try to portray myself as other people.','',1627836281,89,0,''),(462,'Are you still there Tils? I\'m going to close this chat soon, but you are free to come back or join our message boards for support here: https://www.scarleteen.com/bb/','',1627836395,91,1,'ST-Jacob'),(463,'ST-Jacob has closed the chat!','',1627836530,91,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(464,'It can be very vulnerable to be \"ourselves\" with others, and confusing to even know what that means! Have you ever checked out other forums, like on reddit or even Scarleteen to try and just chat with people for friendship?','',1627836551,89,3,'Ruby'),(465,'I\'ve checked out Reddit, but I personally don\'t like Reddit because I find the amount of content to be overwhelming. I use a forum in another country that\'s meant for teenagers in that country, but the people in that forum have accepted me so far. I haven\'t used the forum much on Scarleteen. I created an account months ago, but I don\'t remember the password. I\'m glad that Scarleteen features a lot of articles about people with disabilities like autism.','',1627837177,89,0,''),(466,'Anybody on?','',1627837194,92,0,''),(467,'I\'ll stay on this time','',1627837235,92,0,''),(468,'ST-Jacob has accepted the chat!','',1627837263,92,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(469,'Hi Elise!','',1627837273,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(470,'Hi','',1627837287,92,0,''),(471,'Sorry if there was a delay last time we are just adjusting to our new chat','',1627837294,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(472,'How can I help?','',1627837326,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(473,'Its okay. I was looking for a little help if I can ask?','',1627837335,92,0,''),(474,'And I guess I can, lol','',1627837358,92,0,''),(475,'Sure! Ask away','',1627837369,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(476,'Its about sex, and need a little help','',1627837390,92,0,''),(477,'We just released a new one today! I like those too. I think everyone can benefit from them, even those who don\'t consider themselves disabled.','',1627837424,89,3,'Ruby'),(478,'I\'m in some pain from having anal sex. Wondering if I should worry?','',1627837450,92,0,''),(479,'Do people get paid to write featured articles on Scarleteen, or are those written for free just for the benefit of others?','',1627837511,89,0,''),(480,'It depends- generally our writers who aren\'t volunteers are paid, but if I write a piece for Scarleteen it could be part of my volunteer position or I could see if we have it in our budget for me to be paid.','',1627837573,89,3,'Ruby'),(481,'Are you interested in writing a piece for us? I think you could definitely write something cool, you have a lot of experience to share, if you feel interested in that!','',1627837610,89,3,'Ruby'),(482,'Aw crumbs, sorry to hear that! I guess we can\'t strictly know what\'s causing the pain, and it could be something else, but in and of itself pain could just mean your body was under stress and is recovering.','',1627837617,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(483,'Ok. It\'s a numbing pain. Took some aleve but I\'m looking online to see if it\'s normal. I did it on friday, hopefully I\'ll be good tomorrow.','',1627837732,92,0,''),(484,'Yes. Thank you for asking. What would be the subject I am writing about, and how long should the article be?','',1627837780,89,0,''),(485,'The anus can be a pretty sensitive place and prone to bruising and tearing, especially when lube isn\'t used. Those are things that will usually heal on their own... there is a bit more of a risk with tearing that it could lead to infection (as with cuts elsewhere on the body) so it\'s worth it that you\'re paying attention to it... hopefully everything just heals. But if it carries on for a longer time or starts getting worse it might be worth getting checked by a doctor, but it doesn\'t sound like that\'s the direction you\'re going in right now.','',1627837944,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(486,'Why don\'t you think about some of the experiences you could offer, and pitch a few different ones to Heather? You can talk about details with them once one is accepted. You could write about your experience with self-harm and overwhelm, your experience in disability services, your experience with finding coping mechanisms like music and somatic therapy, or something else, if you are called to write about something else...it would be ideal for it to be some kind of honest message of your experience but not one that has to get into the details of everything, but a piece that others could generally relate to. Does that make sense?','',1627837949,89,3,'Ruby'),(487,'https://www.scarleteen.com/want_to_write_for_scarleteen','',1627837995,89,3,'Ruby'),(488,'There\'s more details there, why don\'t you check that page out?','',1627838007,89,3,'Ruby'),(489,'Yikes. Ok. We used a ton of lube and I was okay during but I have been sore since I got out of bed yesterday. It\'s no fun!','',1627838048,92,0,''),(490,'And I\'m not gonna do it again!','',1627838081,92,0,''),(491,'Hopefully you\'ll have a chance to rest! And yep that seems like a sound decision if it\'s something that feels crap for you afterwards!','',1627838147,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(492,'Cheerleader practice on Tuesday!','',1627838181,92,0,''),(493,'Dumb','',1627838186,92,0,''),(494,'Aw, I don\'t think it\'s dumb to experiment. And obviously I can\'t say for certain, but with any luck you will feel better by then.','',1627838285,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(495,'Yea I was curious. Thought I did okay, but wasn\'t expecting the pain.','',1627838336,92,0,''),(496,'In the long run it\'s good to be easy on ourselves about following our curiosity, sometimes it leads somewhere good, somtimes we don\'t like how it turns out but in general we do always seem learn something, and that\'s worthwhile.','',1627838455,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(497,'It was okay. My boyfriend and I did it, we talked about it.','',1627838519,92,0,''),(498,'Thanks for having this chat btw. I was looking for something like this.','',1627838544,92,0,''),(499,'Good stuff! Is there anything else or shall we end the chat here?','',1627838546,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(500,'I am good thanks. I\'ll join that msg board in a bit.','',1627838579,92,0,''),(501,'Ah no problem, it\'s what we do and it\'s good knowing we can be helpful. And yeah! Enjoy the message boards.','',1627838602,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(502,'Bye!','',1627838604,92,1,'ST-Jacob'),(503,'Cya','',1627838612,92,0,''),(504,'ST-Jacob has closed the chat!','',1627838615,92,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(505,'Thank you for sending me the link. Should I send a few different subject ideas to the editorial email account, to Heather\'s own email account, or should I chat personally with Heather through this chat service about what I could write about potentially?','',1627838767,89,0,''),(506,'Send some ideas to the editorial email account to start with!','',1627839657,89,3,'Ruby'),(507,'Ok, thank you Ruby. How have you been doing since I chatted with you last time?','',1627839703,89,0,''),(508,'I\'ve been doing well! Lots of transition but things are feeling pretty solid for me lately, except a lot of people are struggling around me and sometimes I feel that in my own body. Trying to find acceptance in powerlessness, not resignation or pointlessness but some kind of serenity to know that it\'s okay not to be able to control everything.','',1627840410,89,3,'Ruby'),(509,'I\'m glad that you have experienced some solidity amongst transition, and I hope you can embrace feeling more serenity this week Ruby! Thank you for talking with me!','',1627840553,89,0,''),(510,'Thanks! Very glad we were able to connect today. I hope you are kind to yourself this week!','',1627840591,89,3,'Ruby'),(511,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1627840727,89,-1,'Ruby'),(512,'I\'m Jason, and I have many questions.','',1629041693,93,0,''),(513,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1629041747,93,-1,'Ruby'),(514,'Jason! Hi!','',1629041751,93,3,'Ruby'),(515,'Hi. How are you?','',1629041812,93,0,''),(516,'Hi Scarleteen Team,\n\nI hope everyone is well.\n\nI have two questions regarding masturbation if that\'s okay.\n\nI tried to type them out but it seems that the word count was too much. :)\n\nHopefully, you can help me.\n\nThanks,\n\nTils','',1629041890,94,0,''),(517,'I\'m doing okay. Honestly feeling a lot of grief the past few days about climate crisis and not knowing how to plan anything that might happen in the next few months. Feeling pretty lost but also very aware that I can still drink water, still laugh, still love people in my life, still do joyful and fulfilling and pleasurable things in the midst of crisis. Happy to be here chatting with you.','',1629042003,93,3,'Ruby'),(518,'How are you doing?','',1629042005,93,3,'Ruby'),(519,'I\'m ok. I\'ve been feeling depressed about how people treat me in disability services, and feeling pressure to portray myself as someone who is not disabled in order to feel safe. Is there a particular part about problems with climate that have been affecting you lately?','',1629042291,93,0,''),(520,'Hello','',1629042641,94,0,''),(521,'It makes sense to feel depressed about that- there\'s been so much asked of you for so long from those in disability services and the rest of the \"neurotypical\" world.','',1629042700,93,3,'Ruby'),(522,'It\'s been smoky where I live and the air quality is bad enough that it\'s not safe to be outside for long, which feels really dystopic. It feels really sad to remember when that used to be a very rare occurrence but now it\'s becoming pretty typical and I\'m not feeling very confident that things will go back to the way they were. I\'m trying to accept and adapt but first I think it\'s important to let myself grieve the life I thought we were all going to get to live relatively free of natural disaster.','',1629042805,93,3,'Ruby'),(523,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1629043213,94,-1,'Ruby'),(524,'Hi Tils! Go ahead and ask your questions! Sorry to keep you waiting for a while.','',1629043228,94,3,'Ruby'),(525,'The way people treat me in disability services feels really dystopic to me too. I don\'t think I can accept and adapt to disability services because I would feel like I have to dumb myself down to meet the people who work there on their level. I try to make myself feel better by focusing on my book and my body. I have 5 chapters left to write for my book and I\'m glad to know that I can still play the piano with my winky even though people in disability services make me depressed.','',1629043270,93,0,''),(526,'Please don\'t apologies.','',1629043796,94,0,''),(527,'It is all very dystopic! Feels very heartbreaking to be in a world where people mistreat each other and the land. How does it feel to almost be done with your book?','',1629043800,93,3,'Ruby'),(528,'The first question is -\n\nI sometimes find masturbation annoying because of the fact I ejaculate which is annoying to clean up.\n\nCompared to vulva owners, usually the clean up is easy and most of the lubrication is absorbed quickly.\n\nIs it possible to masturbate and orgasm without ejaculating?','',1629043813,94,0,''),(529,'It is possible, in a way- some folks with penises practice something called \"semen retention\" or \"injaculation\" which is essentially where people practice getting themselves up to the point of orgasm and then either stopping masturbation or sex entirely, or tensing/pressing on the musculus pubococcygeus – also known as the PC muscle -- which is near the anus. Apparently, this squeezes closed a spermatic duct which means the sperm is encouraged to stay in the sperm sac rather than coming out of the body. I can\'t personally vouch for this as I\'ve never tried it, but there are lots of resources on the internet if you search \"semen retention\" or \"injaculation\" that can explain it in more detail.','',1629044088,94,3,'Ruby'),(530,'In the past couple of weeks, the ending of my book has formed more clearly in my mind, so I have a stronger sense of the finale I\'m moving towards then when I started. I know that if the last 5 chapters are going to work, I have to continue being there for the characters and being truthful to who the characters are as individuals. I try to keep being there for my body too. I\'ve been doing 5 minute planks and I\'m going to try to do a 6 minute plank for the first time today.','',1629044098,93,0,''),(531,'Nice, that\'s a long plank! I\'m excited for you to be done with your book. Then do you plan to go into editing stages or just move on to the next project?','',1629044131,93,3,'Ruby'),(532,'Awesome. Thank you so much for the info. I will definitely look into this further.','',1629044147,94,0,''),(533,'My second question is -\n\nSome vulva owners can squirt with the assistance of their g-spot.\n\nMales have a p-spot and I was wondering, is it possible for men to squirt in their own way - like release prostate fluid like females?','',1629044159,94,0,''),(534,'I think most people would just say that ejaculation is essentially the same thing, but I am seeing one article online that describes a man who has learned that he can produce a more clear liquid similar to people with vulvas who squirt and that it\'s similar to urine. I\'m not sure if that\'s prostate fluid the person is releasing, or if that\'s becoming more of a common experience with people, but I haven\'t seen much about it until doing some googling just now!','',1629044309,94,3,'Ruby'),(535,'https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/male-squirting-orgasm-porn-video-how-to','',1629044329,94,3,'Ruby'),(536,'This is the article I found. It doesn\'t seem very scientific, though, so be warned!','',1629044339,94,3,'Ruby'),(537,'Okay. Thanks for sending that over. I\'ll take a look.','',1629044386,94,0,''),(538,'My last question is that recently Scarleteen updated their chat interface and I\'ve noticed that the ability to send current chats via email has disappeared. Do you know if this will be returning?','',1629044541,94,0,''),(539,'I look forward to accomplishing any edits involved. I\'ve been trying to edit what I do as much as I can from chapter to chapter, but there might be additional edits when the book is completed and becomes an entire novel. The next project would probably be a screenplay or short story. I don\'t have another idea for a novel at the moment, but I hope I can publish this novel. I submitted an idea for a piece to the editorial staff at Scarleteen, but I haven\'t heard back from them.','',1629044634,93,0,''),(540,'I\'m not sure about that! I can ask our tech person if that\'s something that could be available again. Do you usually use chat via email?','',1629044637,94,3,'Ruby'),(541,'Heather\'s been going through some really hard times in the past couple weeks, so I think they\'ve been stepping away from non-immediate work. I hope they get back to you soon!','',1629044675,93,3,'Ruby'),(542,'I mean previously, on the chat interface, there was an option to send the chat history to your personal email address.','',1629044685,94,0,''),(543,'This seems to have been removed.','',1629044689,94,0,''),(544,'If it can be brought back, that would be great for me.','',1629044700,94,0,''),(545,'Oh, I see. I will send that question over to our tech person and see if there\'s anything we can do!','',1629044717,94,3,'Ruby'),(546,'Do you know what has been so difficult for Heather recently?','',1629044730,93,0,''),(547,'Amazing. Thank you so much for your help today Ruby.','',1629044751,94,0,''),(548,'You have yet again been great. :)','',1629044760,94,0,''),(549,'No problem! Any other questions?','',1629044760,94,3,'Ruby'),(550,'I\'m all set.','',1629044768,94,0,''),(551,'Thank you.','',1629044770,94,0,''),(552,'Okay, take care, Tils!','',1629044841,94,3,'Ruby'),(553,'Bye.','',1629044876,94,0,''),(554,'They had an incident where their dog had to go to the er, and one of their dearest friends died.','',1629044877,93,3,'Ruby'),(555,'Visitor has closed the chat explicitly!','',1629044884,94,-1,''),(556,'Among other things!','',1629044899,93,3,'Ruby'),(557,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1629044907,94,-1,'Ruby'),(558,'That is very sad. I\'ve been struggling to process the death of my cousin. I still don\'t know what he died from. I feel tense when I think about how vulnerable he was because I feel vulnerable too.','',1629045060,93,0,''),(559,'It\'s so heartbreaking when folks die, even if we aren\'t close to them. We are all very vulnerable at the end of the day.','',1629046215,93,3,'Ruby'),(560,'Yes, I relate to his vulnerability because he had been a foster child, he was diagnosed with schizophrenia, his mom recently got divorced and moved to the other side of the country, and he died living in the desert in a remote part of New Mexico with his father who had been abusive to him. My parents heard his dad abusing him in the 1980\'s, and he died living with the person who abused him. It sounds like people neglected him, and people turn their back on me too.','',1629046836,93,0,''),(561,'I bet your experience of feeling neglected and vulnerable could be really helpful to others who are feeling that way too. Community and camaraderie can be so healing between folks who have painful pasts.','',1629047161,93,3,'Ruby'),(562,'Maybe it could be helpful. I\'m glad that I can move my body and write my book, so at least I have freedom to reach out beyond myself and try not to be controlled or defined by others. I like being nice to people, but people in disability services make me feel mean. I like being nice to you.','',1629047464,93,0,''),(563,'It can be hard to have compassion for those who hurt us, especially when we need to feel our righteous anger at being mistreated. Kindness doesn\'t have to mean the absence of boundaries or anger towards mistreatment, but it can mean understanding that everyone is acting from a place of their own trauma.','',1629047530,93,3,'Ruby'),(564,'I\'m glad you have the freedom to do things that feel good too.','',1629047536,93,3,'Ruby'),(565,'The way people treat me in disability services only seems to be getting worse, so maybe I am igniting the trauma in these people. I\'m not trying to ignite the trauma in other people. I\'m just responding to the contradictory ways they treat me. The people who work in disability services don\'t seem to follow rules, then they put the blame on me, so I\'m left feeling conflicted. I try to communicate, but it\'s easier to communicate with people who don\'t seem to be related to my experience.','',1629047959,93,0,''),(566,'You aren\'t responsible for what other people do or if they get triggered or not. We all trigger each other for various reasons and aren\'t able to control how people treat us. But we\'re never deserving of mistreatment.','',1629048529,93,3,'Ruby'),(567,'The people in disability services said I wrote inappropriate emails. I recreated what happened with disability services in England two weeks ago, and they were responsive to me. In Massachusetts, they put the blame on me, and they said I did inappropriate things. In England, they were responsive to me, and they did not put the blame on me. I don\'t know why people are more responsive to me when I portray myself as living in England.','',1629048794,93,0,''),(568,'We can\'t rationalize or intellectualize why people do the things they do, even though we want to understand so we can avoid painful circumstances in the future. There are so many different contextual things and unseen circumstances that influence why people feel the things they do and respond the way they do.','',1629048897,93,3,'Ruby'),(569,'Do I need to use EC?','',1629049229,95,0,''),(570,'The personality traits of other people become part of who I am, so I don\'t know how not to intellectualize why people do what they do. I\'m not sure I would be able to stay alive if I didn\'t intellectualize the way people act around me because I would simply be a disabled person doing what other people tell me to do. Intellectualizing why other people do what they do is the reason I\'m writing my novel right now. If I didn\'t intellectualize, I would probably make myself more vulnerable.','',1629049232,93,0,''),(571,'After my boyfriend finished and pulled out, the condom slipped off and stayed in. I noticed thirty seconds later and panicked and pulled it out','',1629049297,95,0,''),(572,'I don’t know if the insides of the condom touched my vulva when I pulled it out because of the panic','',1629049327,95,0,''),(573,'I don\'t mean to imply that you are doing things wrong. I have total faith that you\'re doing whatever you need to do, and I also understand that being in your body can be a really intense and painful experience. If intellectualizing means you can survive and feel more present in the world, that\'s absolutely your right and I support what you need to do.','',1629049586,93,3,'Ruby'),(574,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1629049592,95,-1,'Ruby'),(575,'Yes, being in my body can feel unpleasant even though I exercise everyday, which might sound odd. Intellectualizing helps me to fantasize which can help me to feel better. I try to find different ways to feel better. Maybe trying to do a 6 minute plank will make me feel better today, or maybe I\'ll feel like I\'m just pushing myself too hard in order to fit into a certain image of someone who is athletic. I don\'t always know what will make me feel better.','',1629049892,93,0,''),(576,'Hi Sarah! If you\'re concerned, there\'s nothing harmful about taking emergency contraception if you have access to it.','',1629050022,95,3,'Ruby'),(577,'Sometimes different things help on different days. Caring for our bodies can sometimes turn into distraction or trying to control something about ourselves. Everything is best in moderation and with intentionality- if we\'re tuned into our bodies and feelings, we can more easily tell if we\'re exercising (or doing anything else) because we feel good and excited to be alive or if it\'s out of fear or dread or whatever else.','',1629050100,93,3,'Ruby'),(578,'Is there anything else you would like to talk about with me, or are you okay with me going now?','',1629050182,93,0,''),(579,'We have 3 minutes until our time\'s up, so if you\'re ready to go I\'m fine with that! How are you feeling now?','',1629050276,93,3,'Ruby'),(580,'I\'m feeling okay. I\'m looking forward to trying to challenge my body today. I\'m trying to be open to you and other people so I can be aware of others. Thank you for talking to me Ruby. Be Rubytastic if you can Ruby!','',1629050387,93,0,''),(581,'I will do my best! I hope you have a Jasonriffic week. Have fun!','',1629050430,93,3,'Ruby'),(582,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1629050436,93,-1,'Ruby'),(583,'I have to head out now, but feel free to check out our Pregnancy Panic Companion if you have other concerns. Https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/the_pregnancy_panic_companion','',1629050536,95,3,'Ruby'),(584,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1629050539,95,-1,'Ruby'),(585,'Im a female and too young to have sex so I was wondering what the best approach to getting an orgasm is.','',1629155226,96,0,''),(586,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629155257,96,-1,'Mo'),(587,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat!','',1629155274,96,4,'Mo'),(588,'Can I play with myself?','',1629155280,97,0,''),(589,'hi','',1629155286,96,0,''),(590,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629155301,97,-1,'Mo'),(591,'Hello?','',1629155381,97,0,''),(592,'So, there\'s no \"best\" way for anyone to have an orgasm, because what feels best is going to vary from person to person. If you aren\'t interested in or don\'t feel ready for partnered sex, masturbating can be a good way to explore your body and what feels good, and potentially experience orgasm.','',1629155386,96,4,'Mo'),(593,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. What can I help with today?','',1629155401,97,4,'Mo'),(594,'can someone be too young to orgasm?','',1629155431,96,0,''),(595,'Can I play with myself','',1629155441,97,0,''),(596,'While we can\'t guarantee that someone will have an orgasm at a particular age, there\'s not an age that\'s too young to have one.','',1629155477,96,4,'Mo'),(597,'ok great thanks','',1629155500,96,0,''),(598,'If that\'s something you want to do, you certainly can. Are you asking about whether it\'s all right to masturbate in general?','',1629155507,97,4,'Mo'),(599,'No problem! Would you like any articles about masturbation or orgasm that you could read through to get more information?','',1629155537,96,4,'Mo'),(600,'sure!','',1629155552,96,0,''),(601,'Ok, one sec. :)','',1629155574,96,4,'Mo'),(602,'Yeah and while we chat if that\'s ok','',1629155581,97,0,''),(603,'Here\'s an article about masturbation basics: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies_sexuality/going_solo_the_basics_of_masturbation  and one on sexual response and orgasm: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/sexual_response_orgasm_a_users_guide Hopefully those will be helpful!','',1629155614,96,4,'Mo'),(604,'Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1629155620,96,4,'Mo'),(605,'nope thats all','',1629155632,96,0,''),(606,'If you\'re going to masturbate now, I\'ll have to close the chat; this isn\'t a service for sexual entertainment of any kind.','',1629155647,97,4,'Mo'),(607,'thanks','',1629155653,96,0,''),(608,'Great! Thanks for using our chat service today, take care.','',1629155660,96,4,'Mo'),(609,'I know I just have questions about it','',1629155674,97,0,''),(610,'Would make me feel more comfortable doing it while asking questions','',1629155707,97,0,''),(611,'I can try to answer questions you have about masturbation if you\'re willing to ask without actively masturbating, but we ask that people not engage in masturbation or other sexual activity while using our chat service.','',1629155756,97,4,'Mo'),(612,'I am ill stop masturbating','',1629155803,97,0,''),(613,'Is masturbating normal?','',1629155811,97,0,''),(614,'It is! It\'s very common and is totally fine to do. We have an article on our site that talks about this if you\'d like to read more: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/gender/is_masturbation_okay_yep','',1629155852,97,4,'Mo'),(615,'Is masturbating a lot ok','',1629155914,97,0,''),(616,'Sure! In general, unless you feel like you\'re masturbating so much that you\'re hurting yourself, or it\'s taking time away from other important things in your life, it\'s fine to masturbate often.','',1629155968,97,4,'Mo'),(617,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629156031,96,-1,'Mo'),(618,'I masturbate 5 times a day','',1629156064,97,0,''),(619,'It feels good','',1629156091,97,0,''),(620,'Do you feel like masturbating is keeping you from doing things you need to do, or that you\'re feeling any pain or soreness from it? If not, it\'s okay to masturbate that often if you\'re enjoying it.','',1629156137,97,4,'Mo'),(621,'Not really my clit gets a little red sometimes from rubbing it fast','',1629156197,97,0,''),(622,'But I don\'t rub it fast the entire time I\'m masturbating','',1629156230,97,0,''),(623,'You may find that using some lubricant helps with that redness, but it sounds like you aren\'t feeling much, if any, pain with it so that\'s fine.','',1629156247,97,4,'Mo'),(624,'No not really and I use the wetness from my vagina to keep it lubed while I\'m rubbing it','',1629156358,97,0,''),(625,'That\'s fine!','',1629156404,97,4,'Mo'),(626,'Am I being to graphic in how I\'m describing how I rub it?','',1629156458,97,0,''),(627,'What you\'ve said so far is okay, but I don\'t need any more detail than that.','',1629156492,97,4,'Mo'),(628,'I like how masturbating makes me feel','',1629156546,97,0,''),(629,'That\'s understandable! A lot of people enjoy masturbation.','',1629156629,97,4,'Mo'),(630,'It\'s been a challenge not to masturbate while talking about it','',1629156631,97,0,''),(631,'Even if it\'s tough I appreciate you not doing it while we\'re having this chat.','',1629156665,97,4,'Mo'),(632,'Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1629156672,97,4,'Mo'),(633,'Can I keep asking questions about it?','',1629156735,97,0,''),(634,'You\'re welcome I\'ve stayed naked though','',1629156753,97,0,''),(635,'That\'s really not a detail I\'m comfortable knowing; I\'d rather you didn\'t share that sort of information here! If you have another question I can answer it.','',1629156810,97,4,'Mo'),(636,'I\'m sorry','',1629156847,97,0,''),(637,'Why does my vagina get wet during masturbating?','',1629156869,97,0,''),(638,'The vagina produces some lubrication when you\'re aroused, so during masturbating if you\'re feeling aroused you\'ll notice more of that wetness.','',1629156957,97,4,'Mo'),(639,'Should I be using it to lube while I rub?','',1629156998,97,0,''),(640,'You can if you want to. There\'s no \"should\" here; if it feels good, it\'s fine to do, but you don\'t need to if you\'d rather not.','',1629157070,97,4,'Mo'),(641,'I\'m still new to rubbing it so I have a lot of questions about it sorry if I\'m asking too much about it','',1629157222,97,0,''),(642,'No apology needed! We\'re here to answer questions.','',1629157246,97,4,'Mo'),(643,'So am I ok to keep asking?','',1629157380,97,0,''),(644,'Yes, that\'s fine. Do keep in mind that our chat hours end at the top of the hour, so I\'ll have to wrap things up in about 15 minutes, but you\'re welcome to ask more questions.','',1629157426,97,4,'Mo'),(645,'Is there a wrong way to rub my clit?  I rub it back and forth','',1629157492,97,0,''),(646,'There\'s no wrong way, no. Whatever feels good to you is fine. People choose to masturbate in a bunch of different ways, because folks have different preferences, but there\'s not a right or wrong way to go about it.','',1629157585,97,4,'Mo'),(647,'Can I explain a little bit how I start out masturbating?','',1629157915,97,0,''),(648,'Do you have a specific question about the way you masturbate? As I said, there isn\'t a wrong way to do it, so we don\'t need to know exactly what you do in order to talk about it.','',1629158068,97,4,'Mo'),(649,'Yeah sometimes I rub it circles and I usually finger my pussy while I\'m rubbing','',1629158200,97,0,''),(650,'I don\'t know it\'s all new to me','',1629158216,97,0,''),(651,'What\'s your question about this?','',1629158217,97,4,'Mo'),(652,'Can I hurt anything by putting a finger in my pussy?','',1629158248,97,0,''),(653,'As long as you\'re paying attention to how you\'re feeling and stopping if you feel pain, no. You want to make sure you aren\'t forcing your finger in if you feel resistance, and you do want to check your nails to make sure they aren\'t too long or sharp.','',1629158313,97,4,'Mo'),(654,'But in general as long as you aren\'t noticing pain then that\'s a clear sign you aren\'t hurting anything.','',1629158325,97,4,'Mo'),(655,'Ok','',1629158347,97,0,''),(656,'We\'re just about at the end of our chat hours for today; is there anything else I can help with quickly before we wrap up?','',1629158408,97,4,'Mo'),(657,'I\'m going to sign out now, but if you have other questions later you can come on back. Take care, and thanks for using our chat service today!','',1629158743,97,4,'Mo'),(658,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629158762,97,-1,'Mo'),(659,'I came out as bisexual to all my friends and family it now I think that I am just a straight girl who was confused about her sexuality. It has been nearly six months and I don’t know what to do.','',1629238235,98,0,''),(660,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629238263,98,-1,'Mo'),(661,'Hi there Lucy, welcome to Scarleteen chat. :)','',1629238294,98,4,'Mo'),(662,'I\'d be happy to talk with you about this! Can you give me a little more information about how you\'ve been feeling and what feels confusing right now?','',1629238321,98,4,'Mo'),(663,'I\'m playing with myself','',1629239167,99,0,''),(664,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629239227,99,-1,'Mo'),(665,'Hi Jennifer, I thought I made it clear yesterday that we can\'t engage in chat while a user is masturbating, so I\'m going to go ahead and close this chat now.','',1629239253,99,4,'Mo'),(666,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629239279,99,-1,'Mo'),(667,'We may have had a connection issue a moment ago, are you still there? If you\'re up for chatting about this, I\'m ready to listen.','',1629239340,98,4,'Mo'),(668,'I\'m going to go ahead and close this chat now, since it looks like you\'ve headed out, but feel free to come back and chat about this in the future if you ever want to. Take care! :)','',1629240034,98,4,'Mo'),(669,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629240038,98,-1,'Mo'),(670,'I\'m playing  with myself','',1629241234,100,0,''),(671,'Yeah you did I\'m sorry','',1629241252,100,0,''),(672,'I\'m not masturbating','',1629241314,100,0,''),(673,'Can we still chat','',1629241365,100,0,''),(674,'Visitor has closed the chat explicitly!','',1629241558,100,-1,''),(675,'What Is anal sex?','',1629241665,101,0,''),(676,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629241696,100,-1,'Mo'),(677,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629241721,101,-1,'Mo'),(678,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1629241739,101,4,'Mo'),(679,'Hi','',1629241820,101,0,''),(680,'Anal sex is sexual activity involving the anus; that may involve a finger, toy, or penis in the anus and can also include external stimulation of that area. Is there any specific information you\'re looking for or questions you have about it?','',1629241909,101,4,'Mo'),(681,'Does it hurt?','',1629241937,101,0,''),(682,'It shouldn\'t be actively painful, no. If someone\'s experiencing pain with anal sex, as with any kind of sex, then that\'s a sign that it\'s time to stop what\'s going on and see if there are ways to make things more comfortable. We have an article on our site that talks about this, let me grab that link for you.','',1629242040,101,4,'Mo'),(683,'Here you go: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/why_does_anal_sex_hurt','',1629242065,101,4,'Mo'),(684,'If I use my fingers how should I put them in my butt? Like should I get on my knees?','',1629242132,101,0,''),(685,'If that\'s the most comfortable position for you, sure! It\'s going to depend on your own anatomy and flexibility, so you may want to take a little bit of time experimenting to see what feels the most comfortable.','',1629242180,101,4,'Mo'),(686,'Should I use one hand to spread my butt cheeks?','',1629242216,101,0,''),(687,'I\'ve never played with my butthole','',1629242273,101,0,''),(688,'You can do that if you want! There\'s really no way that you \"should\" be exploring this; it\'s really going to come down to what feels good or easiest for you.','',1629242324,101,4,'Mo'),(689,'What we do strongly recommend is that if you\'re inserting anything inside yourself you use a good lubricant and that if you\'re using a toy it\'s vital to use one with a flared base that can\'t fit inside you.','',1629242364,101,4,'Mo'),(690,'Should I use a toy instead of my fingers','',1629242396,101,0,''),(691,'You may find your fingers easiest to work with at first, as they\'re probably smaller than most toys and you\'ll be more aware of what you\'re doing since toys don\'t have nerve endings in them. But again, it\'s up to you and what you want to try.','',1629242450,101,4,'Mo'),(692,'Yeah my fingers are small so maybe I should my finger since my butthole has never been played with','',1629242494,101,0,''),(693,'I just want to try it to see how it feels','',1629242517,101,0,''),(694,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629242534,100,-1,'Mo'),(695,'That makes sense!','',1629242547,101,4,'Mo'),(696,'Should I try it?','',1629242597,101,0,''),(697,'I want to','',1629242698,101,0,''),(698,'It\'s not okay to pretend to be a different user in order to get past a boundary we\'ve set for you. I\'m going to close this chat now.','',1629242776,101,4,'Mo'),(699,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629242806,101,-1,'Mo'),(700,'there’s something hanging out down there and i have no idea wha it is.','',1629496793,102,0,''),(701,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629496831,102,-1,'Mo'),(702,'is it normal or no','',1629496833,102,0,''),(703,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1629496849,102,4,'Mo'),(704,'Can you give a little more information about what exactly it is that you\'re noticing? Since we can\'t see you over this service and aren\'t able to diagnose any issue, I may not be able to tell you what it is that you\'re seeing, but I\'ll do my best if you can fill me in on the details.','',1629496910,102,4,'Mo'),(705,'okay so i’ve noticed it a really long time ago but i thought it was normal but honestly i’m not sure anymore. it’s like a piece of flesh that is wrinkly and soft and it doesn’t really hurt when i touch it but it just hanging out down there bothers me. and it like hangs out on the left side','',1629497046,102,0,''),(706,'i’m 16 by the way','',1629497107,102,0,''),(707,'Got it, thanks! I\'m wondering if what you\'re noticing is one of your labia; even if you\'re noticing it just on one side, some folks have labia that are a little asymmetrical so it may be a bit longer on the left. Let me grab you a link to an article with information and an illustration of a vulva that shows the labia.','',1629497177,102,4,'Mo'),(708,'okay thank you','',1629497214,102,0,''),(709,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/innies_outies_the_vagina_clitoris_uterus_and_more Here\'s that link. I don\'t know if you\'ve ever done this before, but something you could try is using a small hand mirror or compact to take a look at your own vulva to see if that helps you figure out what you\'re feeling.','',1629497224,102,4,'Mo'),(710,'i have done that before and i’ve read many different articles but like i’m just not sure if what i see is exactly what these articles are talking about yk what i mean?','',1629497326,102,0,''),(711,'Yeah, for sure! I think one thing that\'s tough is that there is SO much natural variation in what vulvas can look like, especially in terms of labia size and shape, and that variation is rarely reflected in images we see of vulvas (if we see those images at all).','',1629497441,102,4,'Mo'),(712,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1629497478,103,-2,'Scarleteen'),(713,'Is masturbating normal','',1629497485,103,0,''),(714,'We have an article that deals with fears that some people have about having labia that are \"too large\" (which of course isn\'t a way labia can be!) that\'s here: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/giveem_some_lip_labia_that_clearly_aint_minor  and linked in that article is a page of vulva illustrations that demonstrate some of the variety that you can see in how different vulvas look.','',1629497501,102,4,'Mo'),(715,'It may be helpful to check those out!','',1629497506,102,4,'Mo'),(716,'Hi','',1629497563,103,0,''),(717,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629497577,103,-1,'Mo'),(718,'i’ll check those out in a bit i just don’t wanna lose this chat..but it’s normal right? like do i need to go see a doctor about it','',1629497581,102,0,''),(719,'Hi there, because you\'ve changed the name used to access this chat in an attempt to push boundaries and talk about things we\'ve stated we will not talk about, we\'re blocking your access to this chat for a few weeks.','',1629497639,103,4,'Mo'),(720,'I haven\'t changed names','',1629497678,103,0,''),(721,'If you\'re noticing pain or a sudden change in how it feels, it\'s something you may want to discuss with a doctor. It\'s hard to say, since we aren\'t doctors and can\'t see you, if this is something to be worried about, but it sounds like it could very easily just be part of your vulva\'s regular anatomy.','',1629497739,102,4,'Mo'),(722,'I just want to know if it\'s normal','',1629497743,103,0,''),(723,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629497769,103,-1,'Mo'),(724,'okay thank you so much!','',1629497788,102,0,''),(725,'You\'re welcome! Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1629497812,102,4,'Mo'),(726,'nope thanks for your time','',1629497833,102,0,''),(727,'Happy to help! Take care, have a great rest of your day.','',1629497887,102,4,'Mo'),(728,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629497893,102,-1,'Mo'),(729,'I like anal and oral sex with you guys \n.','',1629500243,104,0,''),(730,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629500265,104,-1,'Mo'),(731,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. What can we help with today?','',1629500289,104,4,'Mo'),(732,'I would like to start chatting with guy','',1629500325,104,0,''),(733,'Are any guys on here??','',1629500382,104,0,''),(734,'What kind of information are you looking for today?','',1629500406,104,4,'Mo'),(735,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629502273,104,-1,'Mo'),(736,'Hi.','',1629644212,105,0,''),(737,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1629644229,105,-1,'Ruby'),(738,'Good morning, Jason!','',1629644234,105,3,'Ruby'),(739,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1629644253,105,0,''),(740,'I\'m doing ok! Lots of uncertainty these days. Trying to just ride it out. How about you?','',1629644278,105,3,'Ruby'),(741,'can i watch video?','',1629644560,106,0,''),(742,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1629644578,106,-1,'Ruby'),(743,'Hello Marvin- I\'m not sure what your question is. Can you ask it in a different way?','',1629644595,106,3,'Ruby'),(744,'I\'m ok. The staff at the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission keep treating me in ways that don\'t make sense. The Deputy General Counsel sent my sister forms I signed with personal medical information about me randomly photocopied onto the reverse sides of the forms weeks after the authorization had passed for him to send anything, and he never sent the reverse side of my application that I requested. I resubmitted the authorization weeks ago, and instead of fulfilling my request his boss...','',1629644726,105,0,''),(745,'Are you asking if it\'s okay for you to watch porn?','',1629644760,106,3,'Ruby'),(746,'...emailed me on the day the authorization expired and she acted like she wanted me to advise her on what to do even though it\'s obvious what to do on the authorization form I submitted. I didn\'t respond to her and a few days later she emailed me and acted like I gave authorization to my mother who is my legal guardian and she said that she can send what I requested anytime to my mother even though she didn\'t fulfill my request on the authorization form. I authorized my sister to receive...','',1629645046,105,0,''),(747,'...information because I trust her, but the staff at the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission keep playing games with me by acting like my sister is my mother even though her name is on file with them as being my sister. I might submit another complaint to the US Department of Health and Human Services because the staff keep ignoring rules. It\'s depressing for me, and it makes me feel hopeless as a disabled person, so I try to portray myself as not being disabled.','',1629645323,105,0,''),(748,'It\'s confusing to explain...the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission has my sister\'s name on file as being my sister, but they\'re acting like my sister is my mother anyway. The way they treat me does not make sense.','',1629645645,105,0,''),(749,'That all sounds so confusing and weird! You would think that it\'s not that difficult, what you\'re requesting. It\'s possible that they\'re hoping you\'ll get tired of asking and all the logistics and just give up and stop seeking out closure.','',1629645744,105,3,'Ruby'),(750,'I\'m going to close the chat out now, but if you want to come back to chat you are welcome to!','',1629645764,106,3,'Ruby'),(751,'Yes, my mother was even in contact with this person, the General Counsel, months ago, so the General Counsel knows who my mother is. The General Counsel is just playing games with me. It\'s not a very fun game because it just makes my focus stronger and exacerbates, but I try to focus on things in a way that makes sense instead of in a way that is disorganized. I try to focus on my book and my body to try to not be overwhelmed by the way people treat me. I told you last time that I was going...','',1629646197,105,0,''),(752,'...to try a 6 minute plank, and I did it on my first try. I\'ve been doing 6 minute planks all week, but it made me feel bad to see the way the General Counsel was treating me on Friday. I don\'t even bother checking emails under my legal name that often because people ignore me and then they play games with me like the General Counsel is. It made my chest feel tense to read what the General Counsel sent me, and I didn\'t sleep well at all Friday. At least, I made progress with my body last week.','',1629646471,105,0,''),(753,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1629646644,106,-1,'Ruby'),(754,'I\'m so sorry this is weighing so heavily on you. It\'s okay to not want to check emails from people who you know aren\'t really taking you seriously. I know you don\'t really want to waste your time with people who aren\'t willing to hear you or respect what\'s happened to you.','',1629646791,105,3,'Ruby'),(755,'I try to treat people honestly, and I try to treat animals honestly too. My cat Bubbles is feeling bad right now because one of my sisters left their dog at home with us while they went on vacation. The dog is named Connor, and he is used to living with cats, but Bubbles is scared. It would be nice if Bubbles and Connor could get along. Connor will be around until Friday, so I hope Bubbles and Connor both feel good as the week goes on.','',1629647187,105,0,''),(756,'Poor Bubbles! What kind of dog is Connor?','',1629647212,105,3,'Ruby'),(757,'Connor is a poodle, but he is a big poodle, so he probably looks intimidating. Both Connor and Bubbles are old. Bubbles is 20, so he is very old for a cat, and I hope he can still feel free to move around. Connor is in the basement which is good for him because it\'s cooler down there, and I took him out for a walk yesterday. I got to see him mark his territory around the yard, and I played music for him, and Connor seemed to feel better after I played music, but Bubbles is still on edge.','',1629647520,105,0,''),(758,'I\'m glad you could take Connor for a walk yesterday! My cat doesn\'t like dogs either, but he knows his secret hiding spots in the attic and will run away and take care of himself. He\'s a pretty self-sufficient cat.','',1629647742,105,3,'Ruby'),(759,'I took him for different walks yesterday which was nice, but on the first walk I got to see him mark his territory which was interesting because it was sort of like watching Connor own the yard and say \"This is my place now.\" Do you have a favorite kind of dog?','',1629647947,105,0,''),(760,'I like all dogs, but I really like spaniels. I think they\'re sweet and I like smallish dogs but I\'ve never had a spaniel. I\'ve never had a dog, but my partner has a dog who I love very much. He\'s probably a mix of a bunch of different dogs and has a brindle pattern which means stripes like a tiger!','',1629648015,105,3,'Ruby'),(761,'Connor watched me do a plank last night, so it will be interesting to have exercise sessions with him around. Is it still smoky where you are living?','',1629648242,105,0,''),(762,'Nope, it\'s not smoky anymore which I\'m grateful for. It is getting pretty cloudy and cool now, almost like fall. Does it feel like the seasons are shifting where you live?','',1629648411,105,3,'Ruby'),(763,'No, it\'s hot and humid right now which is why it\'s good for Connor to stay in the basement where it\'s cooler. Do you take your partner\'s dogs out for walks?','',1629648552,105,0,''),(764,'I do, almost every day! We are lucky enough to live where we can go for long walks with him off leash most of the time.','',1629648598,105,3,'Ruby'),(765,'Where I live, there are not even sidewalks, so I would probably have to keep any dog on their leash in order to keep them safe from speeding drivers. Since you live in an open area, do you ever take your cat out for walks too?','',1629648979,105,0,''),(766,'I don\'t actually live with my cat! My cat is also my family cat and lives with my dad.','',1629649349,105,3,'Ruby'),(767,'He takes himself outside all the time, though.','',1629649360,105,3,'Ruby'),(768,'Now that the fall is approaching, are you planning on moving into a van, or are you not planning on doing that anymore?','',1629649464,105,0,''),(769,'To be honest, Jason, I have no clue. Everything feels very up in the air right now. There are a lot of options and they would all be good ones and it feels a bit overwhelming to try and decide.','',1629649750,105,3,'Ruby'),(770,'I\'d like to finish my novel by the end of September, but I have no clue if that will happen either. Every time I write I feel like I want to be there for the characters themselves, and I want them to be honest with me. I tried writing the next chapter yesterday, but I got distracted by the thought of the way people treat me, then I got distracted by Connor coming over, and then I felt too tired to continue writing in the afternoon. My novel feels overwhelming, but I trust I can end it honestly.','',1629650091,105,0,''),(771,'It\'s going to go exactly the way it needs to go! There\'s no rush. It sounds like the characters tell you what they want to happen and at what pace. Faith sounds like a good idea here.','',1629650271,105,3,'Ruby'),(772,'Writing the novel is like telling the truth. I want to tell the truth and remain open to my mind and my body. Writing a novel is like being open to the truth of my mind, and being a stripper is like being open to the truth of my body. I wonder if my novel will get published, or if I will get to be a stripper for people who want me to entertain them with my honesty. It can feel overwhelming to try to be honest like this, especially when it\'s not reciprocated by others.','',1629650750,105,0,''),(773,'I hope you self-publish your novel if you have trouble getting it published with an agent! I like the way you work honesty into your intellectual self and your embodied self. I want to do that too.','',1629650867,105,3,'Ruby'),(774,'Being honest when it\'s not received well or reciprocated is totally overwhelming. But I think it can also be very rewarding.','',1629650884,105,3,'Ruby'),(775,'I write in the basement, so maybe Connor will help me along as I write. Animals tend to be honest about the way they feel, and I try to be honest about the way I feel. I like that you want to be honest too. I\'m glad that you allow me to chat with you. Do you like using this new system for catting better than the old one?','',1629651279,105,0,''),(776,'I think it\'s fine! I\'m still getting used to the new layout. Overall it works pretty much the same way. How do you feel about it?','',1629651315,105,3,'Ruby'),(777,'Chatting is what I meant to say, not catting, of course. I think the new chat system works fine, but it\'s a little more difficult to use than the last one because it limits how much you can type. Other than that, it works well. Was there a particular reason this chat system replaced the older one?','',1629651603,105,0,''),(778,'I\'m not sure! I know that we didn\'t have a way to block users who were trolling us before, and I think we do have a way to do that now.','',1629652724,105,3,'Ruby'),(779,'Either way you\'re chatting with me, I\'m glad that I can communicate with you Ruby! Even though there is uncertainty for you right now, I hope you are able to embrace being Rubytastic this week!','',1629652857,105,0,''),(780,'Thank you, Jason! Even though things feel overwhelming and confusing at times, I hope you\'re able to stay honest and continue doing the coping mechanisms that help you feel purposeful.','',1629652896,105,3,'Ruby'),(781,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1629655268,105,-1,'Ruby'),(782,'Test','',1629658820,107,0,''),(783,'ST-Jacob has accepted the chat!','',1629658839,107,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(784,'Welcome to Scarleteen Live Chat! How can I help?','',1629659286,107,1,'ST-Jacob'),(785,'For help dealing with a scare (including what poses a risk and your next steps based on your unique situation), you may use our tool on site built for this purpose: [b][url=http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/the_pregnancy_panic_companion]The Pregnancy Panic Companion[/url][/b].\nFor help with anxiety, [url=http://www.scarleteen.com/anxiety_and_other_mental_health_resources][b]click here[/b][/url].\nFor related help and information at Scarleteen, [url=http://www.scarleteen.com/pregnancy_scare_resources][b]click here[/b][/url].\nIf you would like more information about this policy, [url=http://www.scarleteen.com/pregnancy_fear_and_anxiety_policy][b]click here[/b][/url].','',1629659294,107,1,'ST-Jacob'),(786,'We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy.','',1629659311,107,1,'ST-Jacob'),(787,'[file=4_a984c648b361ab9b3a943983dff198bc]','',1629659915,107,-1,''),(788,'I’m hurt because she left me at “seen” after asking if she’s finally dating someone new (or old)','',1629756468,108,0,''),(789,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629756500,108,-1,'Mo'),(790,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1629756510,108,4,'Mo'),(791,'The thing is, I’ve been in love with this girl for almost three years now','',1629756516,108,0,''),(792,'Hi! :)','',1629756528,108,0,''),(793,'Can you give me a little background on the relationship you have or had and how you\'re feeling right now?','',1629756554,108,4,'Mo'),(794,'And yeah, well, technically I already admitted my feelings to her thrice','',1629756566,108,0,''),(795,'Got rejected in different ways','',1629756581,108,0,''),(796,'I’m sad, hurt, depressed, lonely, frustrated, I just feel a lot of things now','',1629756605,108,0,''),(797,'It sound really sad to have such strong feelings for someone who isn\'t reciprocating them, I\'m sorry.','',1629756632,108,4,'Mo'),(798,'Anyway, even though that was the case, we kept on chatting (she lives far away from where I’m from)','',1629756652,108,0,''),(799,'and then suddenly','',1629756665,108,0,''),(800,'A month ago','',1629756676,108,0,''),(801,'things just shifted','',1629756683,108,0,''),(802,'I asked about something regarding the story she posted involving random photos of her camera roll','',1629756717,108,0,''),(803,'she said “i think too much. It’s just a camera roll lol”','',1629756732,108,0,''),(804,'after that, a few days later','',1629756741,108,0,''),(805,'she posted a screenshot of her conversation on iMessage with her sending a pic and the other person sending an animé pic mimicking the pic she sent. She covered the person’s name.','',1629756793,108,0,''),(806,'And yeah, I can’t help but feel that it’s the same guy she used to date, I think.','',1629756822,108,0,''),(807,'basically, her last relationship was with someone (her boss) that already was in a relationship with someone else','',1629756852,108,0,''),(808,'The guy’s married now','',1629756880,108,0,''),(809,'but yeah, here he is, suddenly commenting and reacting to her recent shared posts on fb','',1629756909,108,0,''),(810,'i’m not completely sure if my hunch is correct','',1629756927,108,0,''),(811,'she never did mention the guy’s name','',1629756934,108,0,''),(812,'it just sucks, you know, you’re both good and then suddenly, nothing','',1629756966,108,0,''),(813,'and yeah, after i asked her that','',1629756975,108,0,''),(814,'i kept posting my thoughts on my ig stories','',1629756990,108,0,''),(815,'It sounds like she isn\'t interested in telling you directly, and if she doesn\'t want to talk to you about her current relationship situation, I get why that might feel hurtful to you but it\'s something you need to respect even if you wish it was different. Are there other things you\'re talking about that are going well?','',1629757003,108,4,'Mo'),(816,'she still viewed some of them but yeah, she never did reply to my last messages','',1629757025,108,0,''),(817,'It’s hard','',1629757061,108,0,''),(818,'Sometimes people feel awkward or uncomfortable talking about relationships or potential relationships with people they know are interested in them.','',1629757067,108,4,'Mo'),(819,'she told me that she lost a lot of friends because she can’t be or do the things they want her to do and said that she hopes that I’m not one of them','',1629757110,108,0,''),(820,'and yet it feels like we didn’t have anything between us all these years','',1629757139,108,0,''),(821,'Like, being left at “seen” just like that','',1629757153,108,0,''),(822,'after promising that I’ll be there for her even as a friend (with the hopes of maybe things will eventually workout)','',1629757223,108,0,''),(823,'Have you been able to talk with her directly about how you\'re feeling, and to ask how she\'s seeing your friendship right now? I think that\'s your next step, if you haven\'t.','',1629757229,108,4,'Mo'),(824,'I haven’t','',1629757248,108,0,''),(825,'should I though?','',1629757261,108,0,''),(826,'I do want to say, too, that if she\'s said a few times that she isn\'t interested in a relationship with you, it\'s best to respect that and move forward as if things won\'t change. Sometimes people can sense that \"I hope things will change\" vibe and it can be uncomfortable to experience.','',1629757277,108,4,'Mo'),(827,'And yes, I think talking directly is a good idea. If you aren\'t sure where you stand then that\'s the way to find out.','',1629757290,108,4,'Mo'),(828,'But her boss is married','',1629757310,108,0,''),(829,'i mean','',1629757313,108,0,''),(830,'she deserves better','',1629757319,108,0,''),(831,'Sure! I agree that anyone deserves better than a relationship with a married boss!','',1629757336,108,4,'Mo'),(832,'Every now and then she’d share something about not having a bf or wanting a relationship, those stuff','',1629757345,108,0,''),(833,'and yet ironically','',1629757349,108,0,''),(834,'she’s into some guy whom she did admitted to me was a toxic relationship','',1629757371,108,0,''),(835,'I think the issue of this toxic relationship and your feelings for her are important to separate. From what you\'ve said, she\'s said no or indicated that she isn\'t interested in pursuing a relationship with you, right? No matter what other decisions she\'s making and how you feel about them, it\'s important to respect that. I\'m not saying it\'s bad to feel hurt or upset about it; it\'s understandable that you\'d feel that way.','',1629757464,108,4,'Mo'),(836,'I’m tired','',1629757495,108,0,''),(837,'all my life I’m always rejected','',1629757504,108,0,''),(838,'and yeah','',1629757521,108,0,''),(839,'seen a lot of people get into toxic relationships with guys','',1629757541,108,0,''),(840,'My female friends i mean','',1629757549,108,0,''),(841,'And yeah','',1629757560,108,0,''),(842,'nearly all of my friends are in relationships','',1629757573,108,0,''),(843,'and i just can’t be with them in the same way that i used to because, if it’s not work, they’ll be with their S.O.s','',1629757623,108,0,''),(844,'And here i am','',1629757631,108,0,''),(845,'It can be really tough when a lot of your friends are partnered and the dynamics change. For sure, that\'s hard.','',1629757655,108,4,'Mo'),(846,'Relationships are like subscription services these days','',1629757704,108,0,''),(847,'if you’re bored, you subscribe','',1629757718,108,0,''),(848,'and if you got bored (ironically), you unsubscribe','',1629757741,108,0,''),(849,'I wouldn\'t agree with that assessment of relationships at all, to be honest. People have pretty complex reasons for entering or leaving them.','',1629757772,108,4,'Mo'),(850,'That’s how i see what the guy just did (or does because who knows how often they talk)','',1629757773,108,0,''),(851,'It sounds like you aren\'t privy to any of that information, though.','',1629757791,108,4,'Mo'),(852,'Simply put that I’m old-fashioned','',1629757798,108,0,''),(853,'And people like that guy screw my chances of being with someone','',1629757817,108,0,''),(854,'and screw that women’s chances of being with someone that she really deserves','',1629757843,108,0,''),(855,'She’s left with all of this trauma and hurt and somehow, has the capacity to pass it on to someone, like me, indirectly','',1629757883,108,0,''),(856,'I think it might be helpful to try and distance yourself from thinking about her relationships (or potential relationships; as you say, you don\'t know the situation here) so intently. You don\'t have all the information, and it sounds like this is stressing you out a lot.','',1629757951,108,4,'Mo'),(857,'Any relationship she has isn\'t something she\'s doing *to* you, you know? She\'s making whatever choices make sense to her at the time. I don\'t think she\'s making any decisions about her dating life with the express purpose of being hurtful.','',1629757997,108,4,'Mo'),(858,'It’s giving me reasons to not trust people in that way','',1629758042,108,0,''),(859,'I don\'t follow how this is an issue of your trust being betrayed.','',1629758076,108,4,'Mo'),(860,'Because everyone has a history','',1629758097,108,0,''),(861,'and yeah','',1629758100,108,0,''),(862,'like her','',1629758104,108,0,''),(863,'they creep back sometimes','',1629758111,108,0,''),(864,'and the next thing you know','',1629758116,108,0,''),(865,'you’ll be told that you’re “thinking too much” when perhaps your gut feeling was right all along','',1629758147,108,0,''),(866,'and yeah','',1629758165,108,0,''),(867,'i’ve been hurt before because of the constant rejections, envy from the boyfriends from my female friends, seeing other people on how their relationships work etc.','',1629758220,108,0,''),(868,'all these lessons and experiences and you try making yourself a better person out of them still and here you are, getting new lessons and experiences again, and it’s still not even the good part','',1629758271,108,0,''),(869,'It sounds like you\'ve had a lot of painful experiences in your friendships with women, and I\'m sorry to hear that. I do think it\'s going to be healthiest to try and be a bit less invested in the relationships these women have. As I said earlier, no one is having a relationship with someone else as an action against you, and I think framing it that way is going to be an unhealthy outlook. It can absolutely be sad and painful and frustrating; I am not trying to minimize that. But in this case with your friend, if she doesn\'t want to talk about her relationship with you, or she\'s uncomfortable with you trying to make deductions based on what she shares on social media, that\'s her right. It isn\'t what you want, but she\'s allowed to feel that way.','',1629758605,108,4,'Mo'),(870,'It sounds like trying to have a direct conversation with her about this situation might be helpful, in case there\'s anything that the two of you can clear up, so I\'d try that next.','',1629758634,108,4,'Mo'),(871,'Do you think I should still greet her on her birthday? It’s next month but I’m not even sure on what to say to her aside from the usual “Happy Birthday…”','',1629758708,108,0,''),(872,'i mean, yeah, i want to greet her but','',1629758727,108,0,''),(873,'It\'s up to you! If you just want to say \"Happy Birthday\" and nothing else, that\'s fine. Maybe see how you feel then; you don\'t have to plan it out now.','',1629758746,108,4,'Mo'),(874,'It’ll probably the last time we’ll ever talk to one another','',1629758749,108,0,''),(875,'I guess that’s all','',1629758904,108,0,''),(876,'thank you, Mo','',1629758910,108,0,''),(877,'You\'re welcome! I\'m sorry this is a stressful situation, hopefully talking it out a bit helped. Take care.','',1629758928,108,4,'Mo'),(878,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629759151,108,-1,'Mo'),(879,'So me and my boyfriend dry humped and we both had clothes on like our pants and underwear but he had pre cum in his underwear. But his pants weren’t wet. Is there a chance that I can be pregnant?','',1629760261,109,0,''),(880,'He says that i can’t be','',1629760321,109,0,''),(881,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629760345,109,-1,'Mo'),(882,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1629760365,109,4,'Mo'),(883,'Hello','',1629760379,109,0,''),(884,'Our policy is that we will no longer answer or engage with  questions or discussions stemming from pregnancy fear or anxiety with people who are not pregnant or who are not or have not been otherwise directly involved with an actual pregnancy. What I can do is direct you to our pregnancy scare resource page, which has all the information you need to answer your question, as well as a step by step guide of how to handle a pregnancy scare. Let me grab that link for you. :)','',1629760478,109,4,'Mo'),(885,'Okay thank you','',1629760504,109,0,''),(886,'Here you go! Https://www.scarleteen.com/pregnancy_scare_resources There\'s a lot of info on this page, so you may want to bookmark it for future reference.','',1629760520,109,4,'Mo'),(887,'Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1629760799,109,4,'Mo'),(888,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629761391,109,-1,'Mo'),(889,'ST-Jacob has closed the chat!','',1629826979,107,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(890,'I need help with a guy','',1629841217,110,0,''),(891,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629841260,110,-1,'Mo'),(892,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. :) What can I help with today?','',1629841280,110,4,'Mo'),(893,'How do I figure out how he feels about me?','',1629841288,110,0,''),(894,'I know that asking someone directly often feels like the scariest way to go, but it\'s also often going to be the only way to know for sure how someone feels. If you aren\'t ready to do that, can you give me a little bit of information on what your current relationship is and what feels confusing about how things stand between you right now?','',1629841369,110,4,'Mo'),(895,'Well rn we\'re only dm-ing','',1629841395,110,0,''),(896,'I\'ve invited him over to a few parties I\'ve had but he\'s always been working','',1629841428,110,0,''),(897,'My friend read thru our dms and she said it was very awkward','',1629841455,110,0,''),(898,'What felt awkward to her about it? How have those dm conversations been going?','',1629841484,110,4,'Mo'),(899,'Well idk she just said it was awkward. The way we talked. We haven\'t really talked about anything deep','',1629841539,110,0,''),(900,'That\'s fair! Sometimes it takes a bit to get to that point. Honestly, though, I think it\'s more important how *you* feel about it; do things feel awkward to you?','',1629841577,110,4,'Mo'),(901,'Does it feel like you\'re both equally engaged in the conversation?','',1629841588,110,4,'Mo'),(902,'I feel like it\'s a little stiff if that makes sense','',1629841618,110,0,''),(903,'Like we only really talk about school, and work, and stuff','',1629841639,110,0,''),(904,'Gotcha. It can be hard to break past that superficial layer of conversation, sometimes. I think too that some folks are more comfortable doing that over text/dms than others.','',1629841759,110,4,'Mo'),(905,'Do you feel like you could say that you like this guy (I assume you do, at least!) and want to get to know him better, or whatever else feels natural to say here, and see if he\'s interested in getting closer?','',1629841806,110,4,'Mo'),(906,'I would like to get closer. And I would like to know if he does too','',1629841845,110,0,''),(907,'It might feel intimidating to ask directly, but that\'s really the only way you\'ll know if that\'s something he wants, unless he also wants that and chooses to take the initiative.','',1629841894,110,4,'Mo'),(908,'But it\'s just so awkward rn','',1629841926,110,0,''),(909,'How do I break the ice?','',1629841936,110,0,''),(910,'At some point when you\'re having a conversation that\'s going well, you could say something like \"I really enjoy talking with you, I\'d love to get closer/get to know you better/meet up sometime,\" whatever feels closest to what you want. It can definitely be awkward or scary to break the ice like that! But being direct is generally the best way to go.','',1629842050,110,4,'Mo'),(911,'what if he doesn\'t reply?','',1629842089,110,0,''),(912,'we haven\'t hung out since like 10th grade','',1629842106,110,0,''),(913,'If he doesn\'t reply for a while, or is noncommittal, then that is likely to be a sign that he isn\'t interested, and that\'ll be disappointing, for sure. But you asking isn\'t what will *make* him uninterested, you know? He already feels a certain way, and if the uncertainty is frustrating to you, then asking might be good even if you don\'t get the answer you want.','',1629842195,110,4,'Mo'),(914,'If you aren\'t ready to ask, that\'s fine! But it may be that things continuing they way they are right now, where your conversations are pretty surface-level, isn\'t going to change unless one of you makes a move to change it.','',1629842255,110,4,'Mo'),(915,'ok Mo. Thanks I\'ll think about all this','',1629842292,110,0,''),(916,'No problem!! I certainly don\'t want to push you to do anything you aren\'t ready for. :)','',1629842315,110,4,'Mo'),(917,'Anything else I can help with today?','',1629842321,110,4,'Mo'),(918,'no but thanks!','',1629842331,110,0,''),(919,'You\'re welcome! Take care, and thanks for using Scarleteen chat today.','',1629842366,110,4,'Mo'),(920,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629842454,110,-1,'Mo'),(921,'I often have weak orgasms/no orgasms (I think), when having sex or masturbating, is it something to worry about? It gets quite frustrating and it has always kinda been like this. Sorry for the personal question and thank you.','',1629844687,111,0,''),(922,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629844744,111,-1,'Mo'),(923,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat!','',1629844752,111,4,'Mo'),(924,'No worry about personal questions, that\'s what we\'re here for!!','',1629844762,111,4,'Mo'),(925,'There\'s definitely a wide range of how people can experience orgasm (or whether they experience it at all) in any given sexual scenario. It isn\'t unusual to not reach orgasm every time you have sex, or to have orgasms that are underwhelming, sometimes.','',1629844832,111,4,'Mo'),(926,'Are there times when you feel like your orgasms are stronger or more satisfying?','',1629844858,111,4,'Mo'),(927,'hello thanks for the reply. They are sometimes stronger for sure. But they are always quite short (like last 4-5s and aren\'t like super intense like some people seem to describe theirs). But they do feel sometimes stronger and other times more underwhelming.','',1629845001,111,0,''),(928,'4-5 seconds is well within a normal range for orgasm length! Sometimes it can feel longer, if it\'s very intense, or if someone\'s capable of having a few in a short span of time, but that isn\'t unusually short or anything.','',1629845103,111,4,'Mo'),(929,'We have a pretty great article on orgasm and sexual response that might be helpful to read: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/sexual_response_orgasm_a_users_guide','',1629845116,111,4,'Mo'),(930,'One thing you could do is see if you notice any common threads connecting the times when orgasm feels better. Is it with a certain partner or type of sex? Is it when you\'re more aroused or thinking about something in particular?','',1629845152,111,4,'Mo'),(931,'I see, honestly have only talk about it with my gf, but she is capable of having a few in a row, but I\'ve never really been doing it. I will read that article thanks :) I honestly don\'t know, it does seem to be stronger when having sex than doing like foreplay and such, at least I feel like, but it happens still sometimes than I ejaculate without a strong feeling.','',1629845329,111,0,''),(932,'If nothing else, hopefully it helps to know that this isn\'t unusual at all! Because orgasms can be so pleasurable, I think there can be a tendency for folks to talk like they\'re this nonstop pleasure avalanche that transports you to another galaxy every time, but sometimes...they might just feel like a brief moment of a really nice feeling, or sometimes like not much at all.','',1629845451,111,4,'Mo'),(933,'im 13 years old. i want a vibrator but i cant get one since im underaged. i want a clitoral vibrator as ive found penetration to not be pleasuring. i dont know how to ask my mom because she is very strict. i dont want to make her mad, what should i do?','',1629845459,112,0,''),(934,'It is normal to have some variation in how they feel.','',1629845462,111,4,'Mo'),(935,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1629845483,112,-1,'Mo'),(936,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1629845493,112,4,'Mo'),(937,'It can be tricky to get a vibrator when you can\'t legally buy one yourself! Have you ever had conversations with your mom about sexuality or masturbation in general? If so, how did they go?','',1629845542,112,4,'Mo'),(938,'we havent. we have had the very generic sex talk but thats it.','',1629845579,112,0,''),(939,'Yeah maybe you are right, honestly I never really thought much about it before, but I discussed about it with my gf and she seemed to describe it  as something really strong and long lasting (idk if male and female orgasms can compare), but it got me to think maybe I wasn\'t normal, but maybe it\'s as you say just a nice feeling, it\'s something really difficult to describe.','',1629845629,111,0,''),(940,'Gotcha. It sounds like it might be intimidating to initiate a conversation about this if she\'s pretty strict overall and there aren\'t a lot of conversations about sexuality happening between you.','',1629845669,112,4,'Mo'),(941,'One thing you may want to look into is something you can use as a vibrator that\'s marketed as something else; we have an article with some thoughts on that here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/diy_sex_toys_selflove_edition','',1629845703,112,4,'Mo'),(942,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]finely has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1629845768,112,-1,''),(943,'As with a lot of gendered things, while sometimes men and women describe orgasm differently, we really can\'t draw a super clear line between male or female orgasms since people\'s experiences can vary so much. It may be that your girlfriend experiences orgasm differently from you but some of her friends might experience it differently from her, and so on.','',1629845812,111,4,'Mo'),(944,'You might enjoy taking some time to experiment with different kinds of stimulation, fantasy, etc. to see if there are ways that your orgasms can feel different but I wouldn\'t worry too much about trying to get your experience to align with anyone else\'s.','',1629845856,111,4,'Mo'),(945,'Yeah it makes lot of sense. I think you are right, it might not be something to be worry about, but I just asked to be sure :) But what you say make sense, it\'s different to everyone','',1629845943,111,0,''),(946,'It really is!','',1629846102,111,4,'Mo'),(947,'thanks for the answer, you answered me really well :)','',1629846134,111,0,''),(948,'I\'m glad I could help! Is there anything else you\'d like to ask about today?','',1629846151,111,4,'Mo'),(949,'No I\'m good, have a good end of day and thanks again, I appreciate it :)','',1629846215,111,0,''),(950,'You\'re very welcome! Take care.','',1629846235,111,4,'Mo'),(951,'It looks like you\'ve closed out the chat so I\'ll sign off as well; feel free to come on back later if you have more questions.','',1629846274,112,4,'Mo'),(952,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629846287,112,-1,'Mo'),(953,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1629846295,111,-1,'Mo'),(954,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1630099581,113,-2,'Scarleteen'),(955,'Playing with myself','',1630099581,113,0,''),(956,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1630099709,113,-1,'Mo'),(957,'','{\"content\":{\"chat_operation\":{\"operation\":\"chat_abort\",\"ext_args\":\"{\\\"attr\\\":[\\\"chatLiveData\\\",\\\"abort\\\"],\\\"data\\\":\\\"At this moment you can contact us via email only. Sorry for the inconveniences.\\\"}\",\"intro_op\":\"[4] Mo\"}}}',1630099731,113,4,''),(958,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1630099736,113,-1,'Mo'),(959,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1630253801,114,-2,'Scarleteen'),(960,'Hi.','',1630253801,114,0,''),(961,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1630253813,114,-1,'Ruby'),(962,'Hi Jason!','',1630253817,114,3,'Ruby'),(963,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1630253851,114,0,''),(964,'I\'m doing okay. Things are complicated and sometimes painful in this messy experience of being human. But I\'m doing okay and I\'ll be okay. How are you?','',1630253900,114,3,'Ruby'),(965,'Ok. I\'ve had headaches the past couple of days. I feel tired right now, so maybe being with Connor made me more tired. I liked taking him for walks, but it was really humid around here, and it felt like one of the hottest weeks of the year. My sister\'s husband said Connor couldn\'t walk half a mile, but Connor could definitely walk over a mile. Connor left on Friday, but I\'m glad that I was able to allow Connor to embrace his potential for a week.','',1630254132,114,0,''),(966,'That\'s awesome! Most dogs have way more energy than we give them credit for. I\'m glad you could be helpful to Connor and get some movement in yourself.','',1630254333,114,3,'Ruby'),(967,'I\'ve exercised everyday since the pandemic began, so I try to get movement in myself everyday. I try to pace myself with the exercise I do, but the unpredictability of what Connor wanted made it difficult for me to pace what I was doing. I did 7 minute planks for the first time on Tuesday, and on Wednesday I had an exercise session in the morning, the afternoon, and at night, plus I took Connor for two walks while it was humid, so maybe it just wore me out a little. Now it\'s Bubbles time again!','',1630254636,114,0,''),(968,'Yay Bubbles! That\'s awesome that you have a way to focus your energy on exercise. 7 minute planks are very impressive!','',1630254722,114,3,'Ruby'),(969,'Did something painful happen to you this week that you want to talk about, or would you rather not talk about this?','',1630254795,114,0,''),(970,'I won\'t go into details, but there\'s just some painful things going on between me and some people I really love. I\'m being invited to do some work taking responsibility for harm I\'ve caused, and am looking at the reasons why I made the choices I did, which stem from traumatic experiences I\'ve had and an attempt in a backwards way to avoid pain.','',1630254869,114,3,'Ruby'),(971,'Do you know about clean pain vs. Dirty pain?','',1630254875,114,3,'Ruby'),(972,'No. Clean pain sounds like taking a hot shower where maybe I get really sweaty and it feels steamy and sweltering, but I know I\'ll be clean at the end and people will be happy that I smell good. Dirty pain sounds like doing a striptease where I get really sweaty and that feels really dirty and naughty, but I know I\'m using my vulnerability to make people happy. That\'s just what \"clean pain\" and \"dirty pain\" sound like to me, but they probably mean something else.','',1630255207,114,0,''),(973,'\"Clean pain\" is the pain that people feel when they are honestly looking at and taking responsibility for their trauma, behavior, patterns, relationships etc. And are able to stand in integrity with their healing even when it feels scary and uncertain and painful. Dirty pain is when people are acting in their woundedness to avoid responsibility, run from their choices, and hurt others in their desperation to avoid their pain. I\'d say that I am experiencing the necessary clean pain to recognize the impact of my actions, and it hurts, but it\'s okay to feel this way.','',1630255511,114,3,'Ruby'),(974,'That sounds interesting, but also kind of confusing to me because people I know write about me like I am responsible, and then I talk to other people who talk to me like I am not responsible. I talked to my somatic therapist and described to her the way people in disability services treated me, and she said it sounded like they were negligent, but the people in disability services make it sound like I am responsible. I\'m confused about if I am responsible, and it overwhelms me.','',1630256077,114,0,''),(975,'Yeah, I understand. We are responsible for what we choose to do in response to others, but not what others choose to do in response to us.','',1630256122,114,3,'Ruby'),(976,'I don\'t know how to honestly look at this because I don\'t know where the honesty is. I\'m not sure I\'ve avoided responsibility because I\'ve hit my head hundreds of times because I feel responsible, and I\'m not sure I run from my choices because I keep talking about my choices. I\'ve probably hurt others, but I\'ve hurt myself as well, so I don\'t think I hurt others to avoid pain. I think I cause hurt because I\'m trying to understand what the truth is, although the honesty is very vague to me.','',1630256536,114,0,''),(977,'There isn\'t just one reality, one way that things are. That\'s what makes human experiences so complicated. All we can do is look at things from our perspective and understand that other people probably feel differently, and that\'s okay. I think you do your best to be in integrity with yourself and treat people well. That\'s all we can do sometimes.','',1630256625,114,3,'Ruby'),(978,'I think I have different perspectives. I write my novel so I can have different perspectives, and I become Jason so I can have a different perspective. If I was just who I am under my legal name, I would probably be extremely limited because people treat me like I am disabled and reliant on others. I have multiple perspectives and I think very externally, so it\'s difficult for me to focus on one perspective. I focus on different behaviors of different people to try to understand truth.','',1630257018,114,0,''),(979,'If that works for you, I love that for you and respect what you need to do to make life manageable. Just so you know, I need to leave a bit early today, so chat will be open for about 15 more minutes.','',1630257229,114,3,'Ruby'),(980,'Ok. Do you think people should embrace their actions and their thinking, or do you think people should change their actions and their thinking?','',1630257353,114,0,''),(981,'I think both! Complexity is usually the way for me. I think living honestly means that we acknowledge what we think and do, but also acknowledge that we\'re often tasked with unlearning the conditioned beliefs that are in our head and that guide our actions.','',1630257569,114,3,'Ruby'),(982,'To exist is to change, so that\'s kind of unavoidable.','',1630257576,114,3,'Ruby'),(983,'My thinking expands and focuses over time, so my thinking doesn\'t change, but my actions develop. I feel weak a lot of the time because my thinking does not change. If I changed my thinking, I would feel like I was trying to run away from truth, and that doesn\'t lead to me being happy at all. My mind works like a robot, and I accumulate information and try to adjust my actions to make sense of what is going on. Maybe that sounds really weird.','',1630257837,114,0,''),(984,'It doesn\'t sound weird! Everyone is different. I appreciate the insight into how your brain and body work.','',1630257911,114,3,'Ruby'),(985,'I know you have to go now, so thank you for talking to me Ruby! I don\'t know exactly what is going on for you, but if you are as considerate of me as you are of others and yourself then you can definitely embrace being Rubytastic this week!','',1630258070,114,0,''),(986,'Thank you so much, Jason- I hope you\'re kind to yourself this week and enjoy being in your body as. Much as you can.','',1630258105,114,3,'Ruby'),(987,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1630258196,114,-1,'Ruby'),(988,'Sexual and college stuff','',1630365757,115,0,''),(989,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1630365787,115,-1,'Mo'),(990,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat! What can I help with today?','',1630365807,115,4,'Mo'),(991,'Sorry how do I use this site lol is this right','',1630365807,115,0,''),(992,'This is Scarleteen\'s chat service; I can answer questions about sex, relationships, etc. here. :)','',1630365837,115,4,'Mo'),(993,'Oh hi I just need some help/questions/whatever about some','',1630365843,115,0,''),(994,'Yeah is sex okay to talk about lol','',1630365854,115,0,''),(995,'By the way I am 19','',1630365882,115,0,''),(996,'Yes, that\'s fine! What we ask is that people not use this chat for sexual entertainment but it\'s fine to give details about a situation if that helps us get context we need to answer a question.','',1630365907,115,4,'Mo'),(997,'Okay so if I talk about like condoms that’s fine','',1630365938,115,0,''),(998,'Yep! That\'s fine for sure.','',1630365957,115,4,'Mo'),(999,'Okay lol so I am at college, got here two days ago and possibilities of relationships and sex have been on my mind for a while','',1630365998,115,0,''),(1000,'I saw in our campus store they actually had condoms so I went when no one was there and bought some, I wasnt really embarrassed','',1630366046,115,0,''),(1001,'Until the girl checking out needed a price check on them but….','',1630366061,115,0,''),(1002,'I bought them and tried one Im not sure if it fits or something, I don’t know about sizing stuff','',1630366094,115,0,''),(1003,'Like I don’t know much so just give me some advice','',1630366122,115,0,''),(1004,'We have some great articles with information about condom use and sizing! Let me grab those for you.','',1630366129,115,4,'Mo'),(1005,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/your_map_to_the_condom_aisle and https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexual_health/condom_basics_a_users_manual have a lot of info that will help, I think. In terms of sizing, you want a condom that isn\'t so loose it comes off with use and isn\'t so tight it feels restrictive.','',1630366194,115,4,'Mo'),(1006,'Okay thanks I’m on my phone so I’ll look at that in a second','',1630366229,115,0,''),(1007,'I’m not sure really what to say on this I’m just confused about sexual stuff','',1630366260,115,0,''),(1008,'Even with this will I be safe, I’ll probably never use them or something I don’t know but i thought i should maybe prepare','',1630366293,115,0,''),(1009,'I think it\'s a great idea to have condoms on hand! Use of condoms makes the risk of creating a pregnancy or contracting STIs much less likely and they\'re an important part of being sexually active. Having condoms (and lubricant! I\'d definitely recommend that if you\'re thinking of having partnered sex, even \"lubricated\" condoms generally need additional lube) is a part of being responsible about your sexual health and your partner\'s.','',1630366390,115,4,'Mo'),(1010,'I did actually bring some lube that’s water based because I know that at least','',1630366425,115,0,''),(1011,'It’s also concerning if sexual stuff ever comes up privacy makes me a little nervous','',1630366461,115,0,''),(1012,'How so? Are you worried about finding privacy?','',1630366480,115,4,'Mo'),(1013,'That’s my other question, like I have two windows in my dorm (I have a single though)','',1630366492,115,0,''),(1014,'Just like… it’s different with more people near by','',1630366511,115,0,''),(1015,'I closed the blinds three times before exposing myself at all, literally people could see','',1630366544,115,0,''),(1016,'Really really paranoid about that I’ve been sexually insecure','',1630366565,115,0,''),(1017,'I think if you have the blinds closed you should be fine! If you\'d feel better setting up curtains as well, you could do that, but blinds when fully closed generally won\'t allow people to see in.','',1630366589,115,4,'Mo'),(1018,'I think it\'s good to keep in mind, too, that most people aren\'t interested in peeking in to other people\'s windows.They might do it by accident while walking by but most folks aren\'t going to try to spy on someone else.','',1630366622,115,4,'Mo'),(1019,'Okay yeah I get it but I’m just concerned about making a mistake and it’s nagging me','',1630366655,115,0,''),(1020,'But also even without the window there are girls and guys walking outside my door as I’m trying to masturbate','',1630366683,115,0,''),(1021,'that’s really terrifying lol but I have actually been doing okay with it','',1630366703,115,0,''),(1022,'Living in a dorm can be a big adjustment that way, for sure. Even if you have a single room there are a lot of people around. If you\'re worried about people overhearing you, playing music while you masturbate will make it less likely for people to hear anything.','',1630366769,115,4,'Mo'),(1023,'I’m trying to adjust and I’ll keep that in mind more','',1630366838,115,0,''),(1024,'It’s just me being afraid of this stuff I really don’t want anything sexual in my life','',1630366880,115,0,''),(1025,'This is just me being difficult but I don’t have anyone to talk to about this','',1630366905,115,0,''),(1026,'And even though sex might seem cool and all it doesn’t feel right','',1630366944,115,0,''),(1027,'i just don’t know how to handle it right now but thanks','',1630366972,115,0,''),(1028,'If the thought of having sex doesn\'t feel right at the moment, that\'s ok. Do you have a sense of what feels scary about it to you?','',1630366975,115,4,'Mo'),(1029,'Well my body isn’t that great but besides that I guess I have some confusion with my sexuality','',1630367045,115,0,''),(1030,'That and I have never shared this with anyone','',1630367056,115,0,''),(1031,'If you\'d like to talk about what feels confusing about your sexuality I\'d be happy to listen to that. But I know that can be a pretty big and intimidating topic!','',1630367108,115,4,'Mo'),(1032,'It has been and it’s really hard to make sense of','',1630367155,115,0,''),(1033,'Like again i wish I was asexual and had no feelings at all with this stuff','',1630367193,115,0,''),(1034,'The dating world just kinda sucks, a girl here literally was giving hints and flirting at me and I didn’t realize it','',1630367241,115,0,''),(1035,'But I still do have sexual feelings and fantasies but I just “take care of it” but I am trying to get over that mentality','',1630367281,115,0,''),(1036,'Getting into dating and trying to pick up on people\'s flirtatious signals is tough! It\'s really common for someone to miss those signs of interest entirely, especially because they aren\'t universal--it isn\'t like you can memorize a list of what behaviors indicate flirting or interest.','',1630367345,115,4,'Mo'),(1037,'it’s hard to know what’s expected of me especially with women though','',1630367427,115,0,''),(1038,'Sorry but men seem way easier','',1630367480,115,0,''),(1039,'In what way?','',1630367480,115,4,'Mo'),(1040,'What sort of expectations feel confusing?','',1630367489,115,4,'Mo'),(1041,'Girls are harder to relate to for me','',1630367534,115,0,''),(1042,'men seem way more straightforward','',1630367555,115,0,''),(1043,'For some reason every gay guy wants to get with me genuinely but girls move away  lol','',1630367573,115,0,''),(1044,'I do think it can be helpful to approach people regardless of gender as an individual and not as representatives of their gender, if that makes sense; I don\'t know that that\'s what you\'re doing but sometimes when I hear people talking about confusion in communication with a particular gender (or other group of people) that points towards trying to apply a communication style or other approach that\'s more universal. The way women might want to be approached or talked to will vary from person to person.','',1630367707,115,4,'Mo'),(1045,'The individual thing is something i am trying to see, like girls are just like me too','',1630367782,115,0,''),(1046,'Girls are just people!','',1630367799,115,4,'Mo'),(1047,'But again it is hard to meet and communicate because of mannerisms and stuff','',1630367810,115,0,''),(1048,'but yeah','',1630367824,115,0,''),(1049,'Is there something in particular that\'s felt hard or like a source of conflict?','',1630367840,115,4,'Mo'),(1050,'I’m kinda an introvert and most people I meet are just way more social','',1630367896,115,0,''),(1051,'And guys humor is usually dumb and they don’t get that','',1630367943,115,0,''),(1052,'Hopefully as you settle in at your college you\'ll be able to find some groups that fit your interests and energy/social levels. College can be a great place to find people you vibe with but it can take a little time, sometimes, and right when things start, everything can feel overwhelming.','',1630368004,115,4,'Mo'),(1053,'Just so you know, we\'re just at the end of our chat hours for today so I\'ll have to wrap things up here in just a second but you\'re welcome to come back another time if you\'d like to discuss any of this further.','',1630368038,115,4,'Mo'),(1054,'Is there anything else quick I can help with today before I need to run?','',1630368052,115,4,'Mo'),(1055,'Well thanks for the help it did ease my worries a bit','',1630368057,115,0,''),(1056,'I don’tr think so really','',1630368063,115,0,''),(1057,'Ok! I\'m glad I could help a little. Take care, I hope you have a good rest of your day.','',1630368092,115,4,'Mo'),(1058,'You too','',1630368103,115,0,''),(1059,'Thanks! Bye. :)','',1630368132,115,4,'Mo'),(1060,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1630368134,115,-1,'Mo'),(1061,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1630493595,116,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1062,'test','',1630493595,116,0,''),(1063,'ST-Jacob has accepted the chat!','',1630493609,116,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(1064,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]test has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1630575529,116,-1,''),(1065,'ST-Jacob has closed the chat!','',1630579018,116,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(1066,'test','',1630579127,117,0,''),(1067,'ST-Jacob has accepted the chat!','',1630579258,117,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(1068,'For about 4 months I’ve come to better understand myself and my gender as non binary, began using they/them pronouns and wearing a binder, cutting my hair differently. I’m seeing a guy who I’m out to but he says he always thought he was straight and that he doesn’t want to erase my identity but also doesn’t know what it makes his sexuality & I am scared of being seen as a cis woman and also not being attractive to him if I begin to present more masculine','',1630707256,118,0,''),(1069,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1630707289,118,-1,'Mo'),(1070,'Hi there! Welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1630707300,118,4,'Mo'),(1071,'This can be a tricky part of exploring and understanding your gender when in a relationship with someone else, for sure. There aren\'t always easy answers in a situation like this. How supportive does he seem overall, when it comes to your gender identity?','',1630707387,118,4,'Mo'),(1072,'He seems really supportive overall so far. I was really nervous to come out to him because he was the first person I’d dated who wasn’t non binary themselves. But he has said he wants to understand and respect me and my gender identity as much as he can & uses the right pronouns, has gone and listened to podcasts about gender since I came out to him','',1630707504,118,0,''),(1073,'That all sounds promising!','',1630707567,118,4,'Mo'),(1074,'I think some people who always considered themselves straight wind up coming to a different understanding, when a partner\'s gender shifts during a relationship, of what their sexuality is. Some people might say \"well I consider myself straight with this one exception.\" And some folks find it to be a barrier to continuing a relationship.','',1630707656,118,4,'Mo'),(1075,'It\'s tough because you can\'t really know what will happen but it sounds like he\'s being pretty supportive so far, which is good! Hopefully you can keep communicating about it.','',1630707683,118,4,'Mo'),(1076,'I really want to keep talking to him about it and he says he wants to understand better about how i understand myself and my gender, which feels a bit complicated because I still feel unsure in a lot of ways.','',1630707866,118,0,''),(1077,'And I think the thing that I dislike the most about the relationship is that even though he’s extremely supportive and I really like him, it’s not the same feelings I felt when I was dating someone who was non binary, where it felt like my gender and masculinity was soemthing that attracted them to me rather than being something that was almost possibly they’re interested in me in spite of my gender. But that is more just a fear than anything this guy I’m seeing has done to make me feel','',1630707957,118,0,''),(1078,'I definitely get how dating someone who is also having a lot of gender thoughts and feelings can feel more affirming than dating a well-meaning cis person who hasn\'t put that time into thinking about these things.','',1630708036,118,4,'Mo'),(1079,'I would keep an eye on how you feel like he reacts and responds to changes in your presentation or other things you might do to feel more comfortable or authentic in your gender expression. If it does feel like some of it is just being tolerated vs. enthusiastically accepted, that might be something to discuss.','',1630708229,118,4,'Mo'),(1080,'Yeah exactly! I think it’s a kind of hard to be in a relationship where that part of myself is seen and accepted and I feel liked as a whole person, but the gender non conforming or masculine parts of me dont really feel like how they’ve felt before with my other partner','',1630708454,118,0,''),(1081,'But I think it has given me a bit more clarity that some changes in my dressing and appearance are really important to me and I want to share that with him because he has seemed really open to that','',1630708496,118,0,''),(1082,'And it has inspired me to dress more masculinely because I feel more certain in my identity as non binary','',1630708532,118,0,''),(1083,'That\'s great! I\'m glad you feel comfortable exploring that and sharing it with him.','',1630708561,118,4,'Mo'),(1084,'I really appreciate being able to talk this through and I actually have a lot more things I wanted to speak about in related to gender and relationships but have to go right now. I might come back next week though to the chat!','',1630708641,118,0,''),(1085,'That sounds great! Just so you know, while I\'m usually staffing chat monday/tuesday I\'ll be away next week and I\'m not sure if we\'ll have other staff here, but I will be here Friday if you\'d like to keep chatting. :)','',1630708687,118,4,'Mo'),(1086,'Okay, I’ll keep that in mind and hopefully come back Friday!','',1630708728,118,0,''),(1087,'Take care! Have a great weekend and thanks for dropping into Scarleteen chat today.','',1630708774,118,4,'Mo'),(1088,'Thanks!','',1630708792,118,0,''),(1089,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1630708894,118,-1,'Mo'),(1090,'How can I recover my erotic innocence?','',1630711567,119,0,''),(1091,'How can I recover my erotic innocence, the mix between sexuality and the heart, the original pure hormonal desire for women that I felt in my teenage years? Now I\'m 22 with 10 years of porn consumption. I only had a real sexual experience with a girl, but it was just foreplay... But I loved it because it was a sweet human connection, and it\'s like I only feel sexual desire when it\'s time for action. I don\'t know if its just me missing my teenage years of hormonal growth and all that sexual','',1630711594,119,0,''),(1092,'Rising or if it\'s just the distorted effects of porn after 10 years of training my brain to associate sex with a screen, knowing all the negative effects on objetification and neurológic changes','',1630711688,119,0,''),(1093,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1630711829,119,-1,'Mo'),(1094,'Hi there, sorry for the wait!','',1630711847,119,4,'Mo'),(1095,'Do you feel like you have a hard time making those sweet human connections with women currently?','',1630711956,119,4,'Mo'),(1096,'It looks like you\'ve headed out so I\'m going to close the chat; feel free to come on back later if you\'d like. :)','',1630712885,119,4,'Mo'),(1097,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1630712886,119,-1,'Mo'),(1098,'I am a cisgender girl. A few months ago i thought a character on a TV show was attractive, and now im confused about whether or not im bisexual. Is it possible that I misinterpreted feelings of admiration/jealousy towards the physical beauty of a character as romantic attraction, so is it possible that im not bi and that im straight?','',1630855565,120,0,''),(1099,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1630855611,120,-1,'Ruby'),(1100,'I am a 17 year old cisgender girl. a few months ago i saw a character from a TV show and found her to be attractive, and this made me confused about whether or not im bisexual. Is it possible that I misinterpreted feelings of admiration/jealousy towards the physical beauty of a character as romantic attraction, so is it possible that im not bi and that im straight?','',1630855681,121,0,''),(1101,'Hi Catherine! Anything is possible. Sexuality and sexual orientation can be really fluid and there are as many sexualities as there are people in the world! Everyone is different, and things can always change- labels aren\'t really so important as feeling into what you notice about yourself and the people you feel called to develop relationships with. Whether you\'re bi or straight or anything else, you can always appreciate someone else\'s physical characteristics without feeling really attracted to them, but you might find yourself more and more attracted to women, which would give you more insight into yourself. It\'s all a process of learning and being open to what comes up.','',1630855780,120,3,'Ruby'),(1102,'What does it feel like when you think about potentially being bisexual? Does that feel scary, or exciting, or just fine and not a big deal, or anything else?','',1630855803,120,3,'Ruby'),(1103,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1630855814,121,-1,'Ruby'),(1104,'Hey Catherine- I responded to your message in your original chat, so go ahead and choose one to respond to (here or there) and I\'ll close out whichever one you don\'t choose.','',1630855860,121,3,'Ruby'),(1105,'sorry lol i didnt see those! but yeah potentially being bisexual feels very scary to me, since i always thought im straight, and now it feels like i dont know myself as well.','',1630855976,121,0,''),(1106,'also many resources (e.g. videos & articles) said that just the fact that im asking myself whether or not im bi means im definitely bi… this makes me panicked. Does this apply to my own situation (does this make me bi for sure?)','',1630855995,121,0,''),(1107,'That\'s okay! I understand! If you\'re 17, you\'re still learning so much about yourself. Plenty of people realize they\'re queer later in life (and I\'m not necessarily saying that\'s happening here). No one can tell you if you\'re \"bi for sure\" except you when you decide you want to identify as bisexual. Plenty of people identify as straight for a long time and then suddenly feel a new attraction to someone in their life and are renavigating their conception of self. This is totally normal, and I wouldn\'t say that questioning/being curious automatically means that you\'re bisexual.','',1630856134,121,3,'Ruby'),(1108,'I think what\'s important here to look at is not the question \"am I bisexual,\" but \"can I open to loving myself no matter what, even if I learn something new about myself?\"','',1630856201,121,3,'Ruby'),(1109,'true...','',1630856233,121,0,''),(1110,'also i was wondering','',1630856242,121,0,''),(1111,'Is there a difference between sexuality & sexual orientation (if I identify as straight could there still be a chance that my sexual orientation is bi?)','',1630856256,121,0,''),(1112,'im sorry if that\'s a weird question','',1630856263,121,0,''),(1113,'because i feel like sexuality means more like an identity thing that i decide, although im not sure if sexual orientation is the same thing','',1630856377,121,0,''),(1114,'That\'s not weird at all! As far as I understand, they pretty much mean the same thing. But I do understand romantic attraction versus sexual attraction- one might be romantically attracted to all kinds of people and love relationship building with them, but only want to have sex with people who identify as men (keep in mind this doesn\'t necessarily mean people with penises, because men can have vaginas too).... It sounds like what you\'re talking about is more about coming out and who you share that information with. If you feel attraction to someone or certain kinds of people, you\'re not obligated to make that your identity, share that information with people, or even think of it as a central facet of who you are. It can be something you just feel into over time, and then feel into what words feel right to describe it- if any.','',1630856530,121,3,'Ruby'),(1115,'I was having similar feelings when I was 17 too, and I wrestled with feeling like maybe I was bisexual, but I didn\'t like that term, and then I thought about using the term pansexual, but I didn\'t like that so much either.. and I came to rest on just knowing that I\'m queer. If I feel like I really need to find a specific label, I can rethink that, but right now I know that I\'m not really boxed into any one way of being, and my relationships with others are less about labels and more about the person who is in front of me and what our mutual experience is- that embodied feeling is more important to me than what I feel like I need to say to explain it to other people. Does that make sense?','',1630856638,121,3,'Ruby'),(1116,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1630856707,120,-1,'Ruby'),(1117,'yeah, that makes sense','',1630856709,121,0,''),(1118,'i guess right now im struggling with figuring things out partially because i dont really know how to, and also because im quite panicked','',1630856745,121,0,''),(1119,'to be honest i dont have much romantic or sexual experience with guys either so should i wait until i have more experience with all genders before i make a decision?','',1630856808,121,0,''),(1120,'We can\'t really make any solid decisions from a place of panic! Whatever\'s going on is okay. Slow it down- you don\'t have to know or decide or figure anything out right now. It\'s totally okay and normal if the honest answer right now is \"I don\'t know!\"','',1630856872,121,3,'Ruby'),(1121,'Putting so much pressure on yourself seems really stressful. It\'s a wonderful thing to learn something new about yourself and be open to this experience of attraction to someone (even though it feels scary). You are safe, no one is demanding you tell them what your sexuality is, and honestly, it\'s nobody\'s business but your own. Take your time with this- you\'re in the process of learning who you are. This is a lifetime commitment, not something that you have to decide and can\'t change when you\'re 17.','',1630856956,121,3,'Ruby'),(1122,'To clarify- the lifetime commitment is just the experience of being open to learning who you are. Sexuality and settling on a sexual orientation label is NOT a lifetime commitment and you can change that whenever you want if something felt right before but doesn\'t feel right anymore.','',1630857016,121,3,'Ruby'),(1123,'thats true','',1630857123,121,0,''),(1124,'also i was wondering if this chat is private? as in no one else can see these messages lol','',1630857146,121,0,''),(1125,'Only other Scarleteen volunteers can go in and look at the chat history, but no one does that unless we are trying to figure out if users are trying to troll us!','',1630857181,121,3,'Ruby'),(1126,'You are totally safe and anonymous here.','',1630857192,121,3,'Ruby'),(1127,'okok cool','',1630857203,121,0,''),(1128,'Plus, this is nothing to be ashamed of. Lots of people are having the same experience as you right now!','',1630857206,121,3,'Ruby'),(1129,'thank you so much! also i was wondering if there are any resources i can look through to try and help me figure this out?','',1630857245,121,0,''),(1130,'Sure, let me send you some articles we have...','',1630857302,121,3,'Ruby'),(1131,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/sexuality_wtf_is_it_anyway','',1630857412,121,3,'Ruby'),(1132,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/politics/q_is_for_questioning','',1630857452,121,3,'Ruby'),(1133,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/i_think_i_might_be_bisexual_but_i_really_do_not_want_to_be','',1630857494,121,3,'Ruby'),(1134,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexual_identity_sexuality/the_answers_for_now','',1630857538,121,3,'Ruby'),(1135,'Start with those! You can also search any topic on the website and come up with more. We have lots and lots of articles on lots of topics.','',1630857554,121,3,'Ruby'),(1136,'Ultimately, you feel into what\'s true for YOU, regardless of what anything you read or watch says. No one can tell you what it\'s like to be you!','',1630857576,121,3,'Ruby'),(1137,'thank you so much! i really appreciate this','',1630857596,121,0,''),(1138,'also i was wondering if 17 years old is a bit late to start wondering whether or not im bi?','',1630857638,121,0,''),(1139,'just because some other people online say they\'ve known/thought about this since they were younger','',1630857659,121,0,''),(1140,'Not too late at all! In fact, you are right on time!','',1630857759,121,3,'Ruby'),(1141,'Your journey is entirely yours and you\'re doing it just perfectly.','',1630857767,121,3,'Ruby'),(1142,'Some people know their queerness well from a young age. Others repress it and aren\'t able to be honest with themself until adulthood. Plenty of people start to question things around high school, when we\'re differentiating from our families and experiencing new independence and a changing hormonal body.','',1630857832,121,3,'Ruby'),(1143,'And everything in between! Everyone is unique.','',1630857838,121,3,'Ruby'),(1144,'cool, thank you so much!','',1630857889,121,0,''),(1145,'Of course! Anything else you wanna chat about?','',1630857908,121,3,'Ruby'),(1146,'i think that\'s all for today!','',1630857928,121,0,''),(1147,'Okay! Take good care of yourself, and take some deep breaths. Nothing is wrong with you, and you\'re gonna be completely fine. Let us know if you have any more questions. <#','',1630857962,121,3,'Ruby'),(1148,'<3','',1630857966,121,3,'Ruby'),(1149,'thank you!','',1630857977,121,0,''),(1150,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1630858301,121,-1,'Ruby'),(1151,'Hi.','',1630860964,122,0,''),(1152,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1630861015,122,-1,'Ruby'),(1153,'Hi Jason!','',1630861024,122,3,'Ruby'),(1154,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1630861042,122,0,''),(1155,'I\'m doing all right! How about yourself?','',1630861138,122,3,'Ruby'),(1156,'I\'m ok. I emailed the lawyer at the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission on Friday because she had emailed me instead of following through on the authorization form she received. She ended up having a back and forth email conversation with me on Friday which is weird because it would have taken her less time to simply follow through on the authorization form. She acted like she needed me to tell her an address to send her documents to even though the address was written on the authorization.','',1630861434,122,0,''),(1157,'I didn\'t give in, and ultimately even though she acted like the authorization was for my mother, she ended up telling me the authorization was for my sister without me having to tell her so. It was intense and depressing for me. People in disability services keep having conversations with me that don\'t make sense, and it just makes my focus stronger.','',1630861609,122,0,''),(1158,'Interesting. That does sound intense and depressing. Did that form get authorized in the end?','',1630861643,122,3,'Ruby'),(1159,'The authorization form I submitted to the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission expired in August, and instead of following through on the authorization the lawyer wrote to me on the day the authorization expired and then she wrote to me the next week telling me that she didn\'t have to follow through on the authorization because the authorization was for my mother who is my legal guardian and no authorization was necessary for my legal guardian. The authorization was for my sister.','',1630861951,122,0,''),(1160,'Oh, I see. So many forms and bureaucratic stuff going on!','',1630862030,122,3,'Ruby'),(1161,'The Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission has my sister\'s name on file, so they know who she is. The way the lawyer treats me doesn\'t make sense because it would have taken less time for her to simply follow through with the authorization. The lawyer who works for her broke civil rights laws with me earlier this year, so I don\'t trust these people at all. The way people treat me in disability services just continues ad nauseam, and it\'s easier to portray myself as not being disabled.','',1630862184,122,0,''),(1162,'It makes sense to feel distrustful- they haven\'t made things nearly as simple as they could be or been responsible to you in the way they need to be. I\'m so sorry this is still such a heavy issue for you to be dealing with.','',1630862325,122,3,'Ruby'),(1163,'They don\'t know me as Jason, but I try to open myself up as Jason. I got in contact with screenwriters in California, and one screenwriter has offered to do a 6 hour online course with me where he will help me improve on a screenplay I wrote. It\'s 112 pages, and I wrote it years ago, but I\'m interested in improving what I wrote. The course costs $1550, and I wanted to send him a check, but I don\'t have any checks that say Jason on them.','',1630862619,122,0,''),(1164,'You could always ask him to refer to you as Jason even though that\'s not your legal name!','',1630862655,122,3,'Ruby'),(1165,'Maybe. It\'s a little complicated because as Jason I contacted a screenwriter who is the brother of the lawyer who broke civil rights laws with me. The screenwriter was nice to me, and he referred me to his friend who offers one on one consultations. I try to protect myself by not giving away my legal name so people don\'t hurt me. I was just wondering, could I send you a check for $1550 under my legal name so that you could send the screenwriter a check for $1550 so I can remain anonymous?','',1630862938,122,0,''),(1166,'I wish I could help you, but I think that\'s a bit out of the scope of what I\'m here to do as a volunteer for Scarleteen. Maybe there are other people in your life or your family who would be able to help you with that? I understand feeling scared about your privacy and wanting to protect your anonymity, but I do think that a screenwriter will have less investment in your legal identity than the other people in disability services who you\'ve been interacting with.','',1630863136,122,3,'Ruby'),(1167,'Yes, I was just asking, but I know that it makes sense for you to not send a check to a screenwriter. Maybe there is someone else who could help me. I\'m not ready to start working on a screenplay right now anyway because I want to finish my novel before I focus on a screenplay. I try to keep making progress with my body and my mind as Jason. Yesterday I did an 8 minute plank, so I keep making progress with my body.','',1630863482,122,0,''),(1168,'I feel a real distance from my legal name to the point where I just make things up about myself in therapy sometimes. For example, before I wrote to the lawyer on Friday, I wrote to my therapist and I told her that I went to the bathroom in my pants when I was at a clubhouse and that I\'m embarrassed by the memory of this. I never went to the bathroom in my pants at a clubhouse, but I try to find ways to embarrass myself so I don\'t get overwhelmed by the reality of the way people treat me.','',1630863657,122,0,''),(1169,'Hey Jason, sorry to leave you hanging - something unexpected happened on my end that needed my attention. I need to sign off now, but it\'s good to hear from you and I hope you have a really good week! I\'m sorry again for not being able to chat more!','',1630865518,122,3,'Ruby'),(1170,'Ok. Be Rubytastic!!','',1630865540,122,0,''),(1171,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1630865573,122,-1,'Ruby'),(1172,'Problems with my friends mom','',1631308910,123,0,''),(1173,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631308977,123,-1,'Mo'),(1174,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. What can I help with today?','',1631309003,123,4,'Mo'),(1175,'Hey I\'m having a problem with my friends mom','',1631309027,123,0,''),(1176,'So about 3 months ago my friend brought me into a breakup sitch between him and my other friend','',1631309081,123,0,''),(1177,'They broke up 2 months ago and my friends mom keeps aggravating the problem','',1631309110,123,0,''),(1178,'It\'s been two months and she won\'t let it go','',1631309131,123,0,''),(1179,'what should I do?','',1631309137,123,0,''),(1180,'I don\'t want to offend her','',1631309149,123,0,''),(1181,'Can you give me an example of what she\'s doing that\'s making things worse?','',1631309194,123,4,'Mo'),(1182,'I think how or if you can approach her at all will depend on what she\'s doing, and how your friend wants to handle the situation.','',1631309380,123,4,'Mo'),(1183,'She won\'t move on past the break up. She accused me yesterday of passing information on to her son\'s ex gf','',1631309520,123,0,''),(1184,'She is telling her son\'s ex gf what she can and can\'t post on social media and she is telling her son\'s ex gf who she can and can\'t talk to about it.','',1631309584,123,0,''),(1185,'That is not her place at all to do, wow.','',1631309601,123,4,'Mo'),(1186,'My friend is pissed at her','',1631309609,123,0,''),(1187,'But they\'re close family friends and she doesn\'t want to dump her','',1631309636,123,0,''),(1188,'My friend\'s \"best friend\" is her ex bf\'s sister and she is doing the same thing as her mom','',1631309692,123,0,''),(1189,'The tricky thing is that I don\'t think there\'s much you can do to change her behavior. It sounds like she\'s taking this breakup too personally and trying to insert herself too much into her son\'s relationships, but it isn\'t your place to try and change that.','',1631309705,123,4,'Mo'),(1190,'She is telling my friend that she shouldn\'t already have a new bf and she should still be grieving her brother','',1631309744,123,0,''),(1191,'Her son isn\'t talking to her at all','',1631309764,123,0,''),(1192,'But she is talking to me','',1631309773,123,0,''),(1193,'Ideally, everyone in this situation would concern themselves a bit less with other people\'s behavior. It isn\'t ok to tell someone else how long they should grieve a relationship or whether they should be dating or not, unless that person asks for input.','',1631309844,123,4,'Mo'),(1194,'If you\'re able to gently encourage any of these people to mind their own business, you\'re well within your rights to do so!','',1631309865,123,4,'Mo'),(1195,'The problem is his mom keeps dragging me and my friend into it when we have repeatedly told her to stop','',1631309928,123,0,''),(1196,'I\'m really sorry she\'s doing this. It\'s extremely inappropriate for her to drag you into this! I think politely saying that you don\'t want to talk about this or are uncomfortable discussing it, then leaving the conversation or walking away if you can, is the best thing to do when she makes that attempt.','',1631310032,123,4,'Mo'),(1197,'Hello','',1631310095,124,0,''),(1198,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631310132,124,-1,'Mo'),(1199,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. What can I help with today?','',1631310151,124,4,'Mo'),(1200,'What is masturbation?','',1631310298,124,0,''),(1201,'Ok. Thank you for your help. It\'s just very difficult since we\'ve been friends with them for 6 years and she was my teacher at a time.','',1631310343,123,0,''),(1202,'Masturbation is sexual touch or activity that someone engages in by themselves, without a sexual partner. We have a great introductory article on masturbation here that you may find helpful: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies_sexuality/going_solo_the_basics_of_masturbation','',1631310424,124,4,'Mo'),(1203,'I told her son(my other friend) that we should take a break. So, it\'s just very difficult to handle all this especially when it\'s not even my problem. It\'s just very stressful.','',1631310429,123,0,''),(1204,'It really does sound difficult!!','',1631310439,123,4,'Mo'),(1205,'How would a boy masturbate?','',1631310466,124,0,''),(1206,'I\'m sorry it\'s so stressful. And I\'m sorry for this guy that his mom is trying to be so involved in the situation, that sounds stressful for him too.','',1631310468,123,4,'Mo'),(1207,'There\'s some information in that article, but people have all sorts of ways that they masturbate. What we recommend is taking some time to explore and experiment to see what feels good to you. There\'s no \"right\" way to do it or one method that everyone prefers.','',1631310521,124,4,'Mo'),(1208,'Yeah he\'s not talking to any of his family anymore','',1631310559,123,0,''),(1209,'and he\'s treating me like crap','',1631310571,123,0,''),(1210,'It sounds like taking a big step back from this entire situation may be the best bet for you.','',1631310637,123,4,'Mo'),(1211,'He first he ignored me for two weeks, then he told me he loved me, then he started questioning whether he could trust me. It\'s all very confusing','',1631310640,123,0,''),(1212,'Yeah I told him we\'re taking a break','',1631310668,123,0,''),(1213,'Good call, I think!','',1631310678,123,4,'Mo'),(1214,'Thanks for ur help mo','',1631310715,123,0,''),(1215,'You\'re welcome! Is there anything else you\'d like to talk about today?','',1631310761,123,4,'Mo'),(1216,'It said touching my genitals. What does that mean?','',1631310799,124,0,''),(1217,'Your genitals are your penis and scrotum; we have an article about that anatomy here, if you\'d like to learn more: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/innies_outies_the_penis_testes_and_more','',1631310958,124,4,'Mo'),(1218,'So I would touch my penis?','',1631311096,124,0,''),(1219,'You could try that, sure! Just to be clear, please don\'t do that right now; if you want to explore masturbation now, we\'d ask that you end the chat. But if you do want to try it out you could see if that feels good.','',1631311185,124,4,'Mo'),(1220,'Which part would I touch?','',1631311459,124,0,''),(1221,'The best thing to do is just try a few different areas to see what feels good. Like I said before, there isn\'t one right way to do it, and what feels best for you may be different from what someone else likes. So taking some time to try different things is a good way to start out.','',1631311541,124,4,'Mo'),(1222,'What will happen?','',1631311685,124,0,''),(1223,'I\'m going to go ahead and close out this chat but feel free to come back later if you have any other questions! Take car.','',1631311739,123,4,'Mo'),(1224,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1631311741,123,-1,'Mo'),(1225,'I really can\'t know for sure how masturbation might go for you. You may very well feel arousal, or experience an erection or orgasm. It might feel really good, or it might feel strange or uncomfortable. Masturbation doesn\'t always feel the same from one time to the next.','',1631311893,124,4,'Mo'),(1226,'If you\'re curious about the process of arousal, sexual response, and orgasm, we have information about all of that here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/sexual_response_orgasm_a_users_guide','',1631311912,124,4,'Mo'),(1227,'What is an orgasm?','',1631311953,124,0,''),(1228,'It\'s explained in detail in that article I just linked to!','',1631312000,124,4,'Mo'),(1229,'What happens when I have one?','',1631312043,124,0,''),(1230,'You may ejaculate, which is something that often happens with orgasm. It generally will feel pleasurable, like a release of tension, and you may feel more relaxed afterward. But just like masturbation, orgasm doesn\'t always feel the same, and I can\'t predict exactly how it will feel for you.','',1631312128,124,4,'Mo'),(1231,'What is ejaculate?','',1631312473,124,0,''),(1232,'I do encourage you to read through those links I shared with you, because they have a lot of information about what ejaculation is!','',1631312579,124,4,'Mo'),(1233,'Your testicles produce semen, and ejaculation is when semen is released from the penis, often during orgasm.','',1631312617,124,4,'Mo'),(1234,'What do I do when that happens?','',1631312750,124,0,''),(1235,'There really isn\'t anything you need to do beyond cleaning up, since the semen can get on your hands or clothing. Some people like to keep a small towel or some tissues around for easy cleanup afterwards. But there isn\'t anything else you need to do.','',1631312865,124,4,'Mo'),(1236,'Would I do it into the towel or tissue or just let it come out?','',1631313584,124,0,''),(1237,'It\'s up to you. Some people prefer to ejaculate directly onto something like a tissue so it\'s easy to clean up, but it\'s going to depend on what you prefer.','',1631313676,124,4,'Mo'),(1238,'What are a girls genitals?','',1631314211,124,0,''),(1239,'Not all people of the same gender have the same genitals, but most women have a vulva, and you can read more about the vulva, vagina, clitoris, and more here: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/innies_outies_the_vagina_clitoris_uterus_and_more','',1631314346,124,4,'Mo'),(1240,'What does a vagina look like?','',1631314457,124,0,''),(1241,'There\'s an illustration on that page I linked you to just now.','',1631314519,124,4,'Mo'),(1242,'It looks like you\'ve headed out so I\'m going to close chat now, but if you have more questions later on feel free to stop back by. Take care!','',1631315810,124,4,'Mo'),(1243,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1631315814,124,-1,'Mo'),(1244,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1631458780,125,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1245,'Hi.','',1631458780,125,0,''),(1246,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1631458865,125,-1,'Ruby'),(1247,'Good morning, Jason!','',1631458872,125,3,'Ruby'),(1248,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1631458891,125,0,''),(1249,'I\'m doing pretty well this morning! It\'s raining a lot here. I feel grateful for the rain because it\'s been so dry. How are you doing?','',1631459193,125,3,'Ruby'),(1250,'Ok. I just want to be multiple identities mostly. I don\'t know how to stand up for myself. I just feel weak mostly right now. I\'m trying to finish my book and focus on my body. I did a 10 minute plank last Sunday, and I thought about getting raped to help me get through the plank. Sometimes it feels good to think about being raped so I know what pain feels like.','',1631460023,125,0,''),(1251,'That\'s interesting. It seems to me like you already know a lot about pain-- at least emotional pain.','',1631460076,125,3,'Ruby'),(1252,'Maybe. Some people say I am not traumatized, so it\'s difficult for me to know who to believe. I made up a story with the therapist I\'m seeing last week about how I went to the bathroom in my pants at a clubhouse. I made up the story to try to be less overwhelmed by the way people actually treat me. Even when I make things up they are usually inspired by reality, for example, I\'ve been around people in disability services who joke about disabled people going to the bathroom.','',1631460511,125,0,''),(1253,'I try to make the reality of other people become part of me. I wrote to my therapist on Friday to tell her that I made the story up. I kind of want the story to be real though because it\'s easier to think about the story that I made up than the reality I live.','',1631460628,125,0,''),(1254,'I\'m curious about the part of you that wants to be dishonest or tell people about things that didn\'t really happen. It makes sense to want things to be different so badly that we\'ll commit to a fictional story to try and put ourselves and others in a different reality. Did you feel any remorse or guilt after telling her that, or did other feelings come up, like satisfaction or feeling cared for in a way that you don\'t often feel cared for?','',1631460707,125,3,'Ruby'),(1255,'I didn\'t feel remorse, guilt, satisfaction or feeling cared for. I mostly felt scared of the way people treat me in real life, and sad that I have to experiment with making stories up in order to experience how people react to me differently. Mostly when I make stories up, I\'m interested to see if I can create a believable alternate reality for me, a reality that is more real than the reality I experience. I feel defeated a lot of the time, so I try to create alternate realities for myself.','',1631461105,125,0,''),(1256,'I understand. It sounds like you\'re trying to cope with a lot of stress and emotional manipulation at the hands of an ableist world. It can be so hard and overwhelming to make sense of anything.','',1631461287,125,3,'Ruby'),(1257,'Friday was the 1 year anniversary of me receiving somatic therapy, and I don\'t think I would be seeing a somatic therapist without your recommendation. Thank you for recommending somatic therapy to me. Are you still seeing the therapist you talked to me about months ago?','',1631461494,125,0,''),(1258,'I\'m so glad to have planted that seed for you! Wow, one year, that\'s such a long time. I don\'t think I am- the therapist I was seeing for a while was doing DBT and stuff, and now I am seeing a somatic therapist too!','',1631461565,125,3,'Ruby'),(1259,'How did you make the transition from one therapist to the other? Did you talk to people about someone you could see, or did you look up therapists online?','',1631461710,125,0,''),(1260,'I told my current therapist that I liked the work we were doing together but really wanted to focus more on the body than the brain, and she totally understood. Then I looked up \"somatic experiencing\" because that\'s a branch of somatic therapy that i\'d heard about and was interested in. I found someone locally who does it and called her and we chatted about what we might do together, and it felt like a great fit! We\'ve only met a couple times but I really like her.','',1631462198,125,3,'Ruby'),(1261,'I met the therapist I\'m seeing last year because I had contacted another therapist pretending to be a woman who wanted to joke about her dad with dementia going to the bathroom. I communicated through messaging with that therapist about my dad, and then I ended up changing character and contacting the therapist about things I\'m actually experiencing. Then I met with her once online, and she ended up referring me to the somatic therapist I\'m seeing now.','',1631462432,125,0,''),(1262,'If I hadn\'t pretended to be someone else, I don\'t think I would have found the somatic therapist I\'m seeing now.','',1631462486,125,0,''),(1263,'I\'m glad you found her and are enjoying working with your therapist now. I hope you\'re able to talk more about your interest in being different characters with people and establishing relationships as those false personas.','',1631462590,125,3,'Ruby'),(1264,'It would be difficult to find a somatic therapist under my legal name because a lot of therapists won\'t see me simply because I\'ve been diagnosed with autism. It\'s the less common therapist who will see me when I have an autism diagnosis, and I don\'t think I would have found the therapist I\'m seeing right now myself because she is listed primarily as having a specialty with LGBTQA+ individuals, and I don\'t present myself in that way. I try to be different characters so I\'m understood.','',1631462887,125,0,''),(1265,'I\'m glad that she was willing to connect with you despite those things. It\'s a bummer that being diagnosed with autism has made it harder to find support, in your experience.','',1631463020,125,3,'Ruby'),(1266,'Have you met your therapist in person, or have you met her online?','',1631463183,125,0,''),(1267,'We\'ve only met over zoom so far!','',1631463274,125,3,'Ruby'),(1268,'I meet the therapist I\'m seeing online too, and I\'ve only met her once in person. I don\'t take any of it for granted because the last psychologist I was seeing I met with for years, and when I told my parents he wasn\'t helping me my parents told me to keep seeing him. I haven\'t hit my head in months, so at least the somatic therapist is helping me in that way.','',1631463606,125,0,''),(1269,'I\'m so so so glad to hear that! That makes me feel super happy to hear you\'re not feeling so compelled to do that.','',1631463657,125,3,'Ruby'),(1270,'I\'m glad that makes you super happy. It doesn\'t make me super happy, but I\'m glad it makes you happy. At least, maybe I can be a stripper soon for others without potentially having to worry about head injuries.','',1631464064,125,0,''),(1271,'Why doesn\'t it make you feel happy? It seems to me like a sign that there\'s more emotional regulation you\'re able to access. How does it make you feel?','',1631464164,125,3,'Ruby'),(1272,'It doesn\'t make me feel happy because it makes me feel like I have to rely on making sense of the way people treat me in other ways. For example, I was crying at the beginning of our conversation, and it makes me feel bad that I have to internalize the way people treat me. If people saw blood, maybe they would take me more seriously. I just feel like a complainer, so I have to keep becoming people who might be acceptable so I don\'t feel defeated by the way people in disability services treat me','',1631464519,125,0,''),(1273,'I\'m so sorry to hear you were crying at the beginning of our conversation. Was there something in particular that felt really upsetting, or is it just everything in general lately?','',1631464841,125,3,'Ruby'),(1274,'The Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission didn\'t comply with the authorization to release information to my sister that they received in July. Before our conversation, I was looking up the law to see if it would make sense to send another civil rights complaint, but after reading through the law I\'m not sure simply their not following through on sending requested documents would warrant another complaint from me. I just feel constrained as to how to communicate about the way people treat me.','',1631465125,125,0,''),(1275,'I understand. It is a really limiting system, and it\'s hard to navigate on purpose, and it\'s a really reasonable response to feel constrained and a lot of grief. It\'s very sad to be in this world and feel so unheard and unmet. <3','',1631465786,125,3,'Ruby'),(1276,'I didn\'t hear back from Scarleteen about the article I could have written for them. That\'s ok. My article didn\'t have anything to do with sexuality specifically, although it had a lot to do with identity. Most of the articles on Scarleteen are specifically about sexuality, so it makes sense they wouldn\'t publish something by me.','',1631466132,125,0,''),(1277,'I think Heather is still open to it, but is still navigating their grief and a lot of financial stuff to do with Scarleteen lately. I\'m sorry they haven\'t got back to you yet!','',1631466287,125,3,'Ruby'),(1278,'If Heather doesn\'t want me to write something, that\'s fine. Also, just to let you know, if Scarleteen is having financial difficulties, I could write my article for free if Heather did want me to write my article. I hope Heather feels better.','',1631466520,125,0,''),(1279,'That\'s so kind! Heather will get back to you as soon as they can. We aren\'t publishing anything new since their friend died because they\'re our main editor and are busy with their process.','',1631466597,125,3,'Ruby'),(1280,'How did you get involved with Scarleteen as a volunteer? Did Scarleteen find you, or did you seek out Scarleteen?','',1631466800,125,0,''),(1281,'I actually stumbled upon Scarleteen when I was a teenager doing Teen Council where I grew up, which was a peer-to-peer sex ed organization. Heather came to one of our planning meetings and we just happened to live in the same town! And then I asked Heather if they\'d be open to a volunteer or intern. So kind of both!','',1631467022,125,3,'Ruby'),(1282,'Most volunteers hear about our call for new volunteer applications when we post about it on social media.','',1631467041,125,3,'Ruby'),(1283,'That\'s a really interesting story. Do the volunteers for Scarleteen need to have credentials, or do they need training before they can begin doing live chats?','',1631467233,125,0,''),(1284,'I wanted to talk about contraceptives if thats okay','',1631467257,126,0,''),(1285,'Hello?','',1631467289,126,0,''),(1286,'There is a training that new volunteers go through before they start doing direct services, but there doesn\'t need to be any previous experience with sex education for volunteers to apply.','',1631467297,125,3,'Ruby'),(1287,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1631467303,126,-1,'Ruby'),(1288,'Hello Ari! Sure, I\'m happy to talk about contraception.','',1631467324,126,3,'Ruby'),(1289,'I think you communicate like you are very intuitive! Thank you for chatting with me, and recommending somatic therapy! I hope all your Rubytastic qualities help to guide you through this week!','',1631467441,125,0,''),(1290,'Thank you Jason! I appreciate all the work we\'ve done together and how much you\'ve opened your heart to me. I hope your week is Jasonriffic!','',1631467573,125,3,'Ruby'),(1291,'Do you have any specific questions?','',1631467581,126,3,'Ruby'),(1292,'Not that specific but I just wanted to know how effective most forms of contraceptives are','',1631467770,126,0,''),(1293,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1631467777,125,-1,'Ruby'),(1294,'Great question! I\'ll direct you to this article, which has a bunch of detailed percentages about effectiveness. Take a look at this and see if it\'s helpful, and feel free to ask any questions after you take a look.','',1631467858,126,3,'Ruby'),(1295,'scarleteen.com/article/sexual_health/the_buddy_system_effectiveness_rates_for_backing_up_your_birth_control_with_a_','',1631467859,126,3,'Ruby'),(1296,'cool thanks','',1631467936,126,0,''),(1297,'Also, if you go to this article, you can click on each contraception method to get that specific effectiveness- this might be a little less overwhelming to learn more: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexual_health/birth_control_bingo','',1631467953,126,3,'Ruby'),(1298,'So I was super curious about how condoms work so I bought a few to try just try them and I got super embarrassed at the store lol','',1631468109,126,0,''),(1299,'I never understand the stigma against buying condoms like I just wanted to see how to put them on by *acutally* putting one on','',1631468183,126,0,''),(1300,'I get that! It can feel a bit embarrassing for some folks to get condoms in public but it becomes less of a big deal over time. Practicing is the only way to really get good at something, so no judgement here!','',1631468246,126,3,'Ruby'),(1301,'Its better to practice and know it beforehand cuz you don\'t wanna make the mistake of not putting it on properly when you actually have sex that\'s almost dangerous','',1631468353,126,0,''),(1302,'Exactly!','',1631468570,126,3,'Ruby'),(1303,'I\'m really glad the online chat service is finally back on!','',1631468950,126,0,''),(1304,'are we still connected?','',1631469360,126,0,''),(1305,'I got disconnected for a minute, sorry about that! I need to wrap up chat for the day, but I\'m glad it\'s back too! You\'re welcome to come back for chat any other time a volunteer is on.','',1631469673,126,3,'Ruby'),(1306,'Take care, Ari!','',1631469766,126,3,'Ruby'),(1307,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1631469769,126,-1,'Ruby'),(1308,'test to see what this looks like from the other side!','',1631567007,127,0,''),(1309,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631567017,127,-1,'Mo'),(1310,'Blehhhhhhhhhhh','',1631567044,127,4,'Mo'),(1311,'nice','',1631567069,127,0,''),(1312,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]mo has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1631567084,127,-1,''),(1313,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1631567090,127,-1,'Mo'),(1314,'Uh, ive never had sex or anything, just masturbated, but im scared i might be pregnant, :(','',1631575686,128,0,''),(1315,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631575759,128,-1,'Mo'),(1316,'Hi there Juli, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1631575793,128,4,'Mo'),(1317,'We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. What I can do is direct you to the resources we have on our website for dealing with pregnancy anxiety, including information about how pregnancy *does* happen and how to manage persistent worries about pregnancy.','',1631575834,128,4,'Mo'),(1318,'oh okay, thats fine','',1631575865,128,0,''),(1319,'Here\'s our extensive list of resources for dealing with pregnancy scares: https://www.scarleteen.com/pregnancy_scare_resources and here\'s some information about why we have our pregnancy scare policy, for more context if you need it: https://www.scarleteen.com/pregnancy_fear_and_anxiety_policy','',1631575891,128,4,'Mo'),(1320,'Oki doki, thank you','',1631575907,128,0,''),(1321,'Have a great day','',1631575912,128,0,''),(1322,'You too! :) Anything else I can help with today?','',1631575930,128,4,'Mo'),(1323,'Nope, thank you again!','',1631575959,128,0,''),(1324,'You\'re welcome! Take care.','',1631576003,128,4,'Mo'),(1325,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1631576005,128,-1,'Mo'),(1326,'I am a 21 year old male. I am into anal play, usually play with objects in my room to please myself but usually finger. I have been wanting a dildo but not sure what size would be good to start out with. I also have a girlfriend and wanted to convince her to get a strap on so she can peg me. Any suggestions?','',1631658688,129,0,''),(1327,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631658722,129,-1,'Mo'),(1328,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat!','',1631658736,129,4,'Mo'),(1329,'Since you mentioned using items in your room for anal play, I do want to start out saying it\'s very important that you stick to only using items with a flared base that mean they cannot fit entirely inside your body and that if you\'re using something that can\'t be cleaned or wasn\'t originally intended for use as a sex toy, it\'s best to cover it with a condom before use.','',1631658814,129,4,'Mo'),(1330,'In terms of where to start in terms of sizing, we often suggest people start with toys on the smaller size, but it\'s really up to you and what you feel comfortable with! Many sex toy retailers will have sections of their website with anal-specific toys or ones marked as good for beginners.','',1631658862,129,4,'Mo'),(1331,'Oh okay, thanks','',1631658887,129,0,''),(1332,'Yes, I use objects that don\'t go in entirely in. I clean after every use.','',1631658938,129,0,''),(1333,'That\'s good!','',1631658966,129,4,'Mo'),(1334,'Have you talked to your girlfriend about your interest in anal sex and having her use a strap before?','',1631658988,129,4,'Mo'),(1335,'I bought her a vibrator and she has put it in me when giving oral. She puts a condoms on it before use. It\'s about 4 inches and I feel comfortable. But I feel like I could go bigger.','',1631659074,129,0,''),(1336,'condom*','',1631659087,129,0,''),(1337,'Another question I would like to ask. Is it okay to be straight but like anal?','',1631659121,129,0,''),(1338,'It is! Anal sex, like any kind of sex, isn\'t something that\'s fine for people of any orientation to enjoy.','',1631659160,129,4,'Mo'),(1339,'Sorry, I mistyped that: It IS something that\'s fine to enjoy!','',1631659177,129,4,'Mo'),(1340,'Like, I strictly love girls but love the sensation of something in there.','',1631659179,129,0,''),(1341,'It\'s okay','',1631659196,129,0,''),(1342,'A lot of people associate anal sex primarily or solely with gay men, but plenty of gay men don\'t have anal sex often or at all, and plenty of people of other genders and orientations enjoy it.','',1631659244,129,4,'Mo'),(1343,'Since it sounds like it\'s something you want to explore further and you\'ve already done that a little bit with your girlfriend, I think a next step could be to ask how she feels about trying something new like using a strap on or other toys.','',1631659285,129,4,'Mo'),(1344,'Yes, I need to gain the confidence. I feel like she would open up to it because she was sceptical about the vibrator at first but she does it time to time.','',1631659345,129,0,''),(1345,'I feel like she would slowly but surely open up to it. She\'s told me it would be hot if I could give myself oral but I\'m not very flexible for that just yet, lol.','',1631659466,129,0,''),(1346,'I do sometimes like to eat my own cum so I wish I could','',1631659514,129,0,''),(1347,'It certainly sounds like something you could ask her about!','',1631659569,129,4,'Mo'),(1348,'If she isn\'t interested right now it\'s good not to push for her to say yes, but you can always leave the door of that conversation open and revisit it if she needs time to consider.','',1631659605,129,4,'Mo'),(1349,'Yes, of course.','',1631659623,129,0,''),(1350,'I\'ve tried anal on her but I hurt her, even with plenty of lube. I tried going really slow and everything.','',1631659652,129,0,''),(1351,'If it\'s something she\'s interested in exploring again, you could try with something very small like a gloved finger (gloves tend to make a finger feel a lot smoother and more comfortable) to start, but I don\'t know if she\'s interested in anal play herself or not.','',1631659795,129,4,'Mo'),(1352,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]Chris has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1631660116,129,-1,''),(1353,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1631660204,129,-1,'Mo'),(1354,'ST-Jacob has closed the chat!','',1631812051,117,-1,'ST-Jacob'),(1355,'I have had a huge crush on someone for weeks since school has started - the most intense crush I\'ve ever had. I got to know the person better and took steps towards maybe making something out of it, like getting their contact info. Then I found out they were dating someone else; I\'m devastated and can\'t get over it. I still have a huge crush on them but feel like I shouldn\'t, and I can\'t stop obsessing over them. I feel miserable. What should I do?','',1631922529,130,0,''),(1356,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1631922561,130,-1,'Mo'),(1357,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1631922571,130,4,'Mo'),(1358,'That sounds like a hard situation, I know it\'s tough to have feelings for someone who you aren\'t able to pursue or who is otherwise available.','',1631922620,130,4,'Mo'),(1359,'In terms of feeling like you shouldn\'t crush on them: I don\'t think it\'s bad or wrong to have those feelings! It\'s important to make sure you are engaging with them in a healthy way, but it\'s ok to have those very strong feelings.','',1631922677,130,4,'Mo'),(1360,'Part of me thinks \"well, I\'m still here if they break up with their current partner, I\'ll just wait it out because a school romance probably won\'t be long-term\" and part of me thinks that, even though I\'m not actually doing anything, that\'s a terrible idea and I should completely ignore my feelings for them','',1631922884,130,0,''),(1361,'because they\'re in a relationship and I need to get it through my head that they\'re unavailable.','',1631922905,130,0,''),(1362,'I do think it\'s going to be best if you aren\'t holding out for their relationship to end, for sure. Is this someone you\'re friends with in general, in terms of talking and hanging out pretty regularly? Or someone you\'re getting to know and not always interacting with that often?','',1631923006,130,4,'Mo'),(1363,'I have classes/clubs with them and generally bump into them, so while we aren\'t \"friends\" yet just because we haven\'t known each other for more than a month really, we\'re getting to know each other & we share a lot of common interests.','',1631923081,130,0,''),(1364,'Gotcha, thanks for that context. :)  Sometimes getting to know someone better can help a crush feel more manageable! It may be that as you get to know each other better you\'ll still have that interest, but having more of a solid connection may make the crush feel less overwhelming.','',1631923158,130,4,'Mo'),(1365,'Sometimes a crush is more about the idea of a person than the person themselves, you know?','',1631923169,130,4,'Mo'),(1366,'I don\'t know if that will happen - the crush got even more intense once I got to know them a little more and crushed on them because of both their looks and their personality.','',1631923219,130,0,''),(1367,'That can happen too, yeah. Sorry it hasn\'t gone the other way.','',1631923261,130,4,'Mo'),(1368,'To some extent, the way to deal with a crush is to accept it for what it is and enjoy the contact you *do* manage to have with the other person.','',1631923319,130,4,'Mo'),(1369,'I still really like them and knowing for a fact that I have no chance just makes me feel bad, but I could try that.','',1631923373,130,0,''),(1370,'*no chance with them, typo','',1631923386,130,0,''),(1371,'If you feel like interacting more winds up being too painful, it is okay to take some space, too. It might be that it takes a bit to figure out what feels the most manageable for you.','',1631923429,130,4,'Mo'),(1372,'I do want to let you know that we\'re just over our regular chat hours so I will have to run in a few minutes, but if you\'d like to talk more about this next week I\'d be happy to pick things up again.','',1631923694,130,4,'Mo'),(1373,'Yeah, I think I need to distance myself from them for a little bit. I navigated to their profile on a social media service yesterday out of habit and then discovered a link I had overlooked to an obscure site I also loved using, and it was just painful again.','',1631923708,130,0,''),(1374,'Ok, I think I have advice I need. Thank you!','',1631923722,130,0,''),(1375,'I hope that if you try the distance it helps a bit. Be kind to yourself!!','',1631923739,130,4,'Mo'),(1376,'Thank you - bye!','',1631923757,130,0,''),(1377,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]Anonymous has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1631923760,130,-1,''),(1378,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1632063351,131,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1379,'Hi','',1632063351,131,0,''),(1380,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1632063364,131,-1,'Ruby'),(1381,'Good morning Jason!','',1632063370,131,3,'Ruby'),(1382,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1632063389,131,0,''),(1383,'I\'m pretty sleepy, but doing all right. How are you doing?','',1632063417,131,3,'Ruby'),(1384,'Ok. I\'m trying to embrace being Jason as much as I can. I end up feeling trapped under my legal name, so I try to embrace being Jason instead. I had yoga as Jason this morning, and it feels good to be someone else. I started having regular therapy sessions from England last week as a British teenager, so it can feel transporting to place myself in another location as well. I created a mum that I live with in England, and I feel more understood by her than the parents I live with right now.','',1632063937,131,0,''),(1385,'Interesting- are they zoom sessions? Are you seeing this therapist as well as your somatic therapist here?','',1632064004,131,3,'Ruby'),(1386,'No, they are chat sessions like I have with you. I\'ve had sessions with British therapists for years, and recently a British therapist offered to chat with me regularly for the next several weeks because it sounded like I was having a difficult time.','',1632064121,131,0,''),(1387,'I hope that\'s helpful for you! It might be more effective to be honest about who you are and where you\'re coming from. You don\'t have to tell them everything about yourself, just the underlying stuff about feeling alone and misunderstood, overwhelmed and confused about how you\'re supposed to behave or be treated. It will probably be easier for you to receive care if you share the important underlying parts of your situation rather than creating a whole new character- because then they\'re not able to help you much at all. Does that make sense?','',1632064359,131,3,'Ruby'),(1388,'I\'ve transplanted actual events that I\'m experiencing into my character as a British teenager, and I make some things up too. I create a hybrid of fiction and reality which makes it easier for me to talk about things that are actually happening to me. I wouldn\'t want to say who I am because I would be afraid that they would reject me, and then I would have less resources.','',1632064571,131,0,''),(1389,'That makes sense. Is this free therapy, or are you paying for it?','',1632064696,131,3,'Ruby'),(1390,'It\'s free. They have more resources in some European countries than America. In Massachusetts, the disability services feel extremely industrialized, like in order to be accepted by them I have to fit into a preconceived notion of what they want me to be as a disabled person. It doesn\'t feel good at all, and they communicate about me like I\'m doing something wrong.','',1632065074,131,0,''),(1391,'Yeah, a lot of American \"services\" do operate very much like a business or corporation.','',1632065138,131,3,'Ruby'),(1392,'It makes a lot of sense to feel dehumanized or like you need to play the game to get the care you want and need.','',1632065175,131,3,'Ruby'),(1393,'I found the somatic therapist by pretending to be a woman looking for therapy, and then I ended up contacting one of the therapists I had contacted as a woman as myself. The therapist gave me referrals, and that\'s how I got to see the somatic therapist I\'m seeing right now. It was a very roundabout way to find a therapist, and if I found a therapist simply by looking as myself I would probably have never found this therapist because she\'s not listed as a provider for my so-called \"issues.\"','',1632065492,131,0,''),(1394,'Interesting. How did it go for you and the therapist you started seeing to talk about the fact that you\'re not a woman?','',1632065534,131,3,'Ruby'),(1395,'We talk about me being a woman and different identities that I become. It\'s something ongoing that we talk about, and lately it\'s been fine being open with her. I told her that I had lied about a story I told her about myself, and she said she would still see me, so I\'m glad I\'ve been able to be open with her in different ways. I make a lot of drawings with her too. Do you make drawings with your somatic therapist sometimes?','',1632065905,131,0,''),(1396,'We haven\'t made any drawings yet! Mostly it\'s going back into memories and reworking them.','',1632065934,131,3,'Ruby'),(1397,'When I first saw the somatic therapist last year, we started doing that too, but it wasn\'t so effective, maybe partly because I feel like I\'m reliving memories a lot of the time anyway so it ended up feeling redundant for me. She does art therapy as well as somatic therapy, and we\'ve ended up doing a lot of drawings together, so I\'m glad she has different resources to draw on...no pun intended. I\'ve tried to embrace communicating through images even though I\'m not very good at drawing.','',1632066448,131,0,''),(1398,'I think the best thing about art therapy drawing is that it doesn\'t matter if you\'re \"good\" at it because it\'s all about expressing subconscious themes and being more intuitive and connected!','',1632066557,131,3,'Ruby'),(1399,'My dad is an artist, and my sister has done art too, so it feels like something I should be able to do. In fact, my dad is doing art right now. He\'s making a short animated movie all by himself. All of the drawings are done by him. I think making an animated movie by yourself would be a very lonely thing to do because I think of moviemaking as a collaborative process. My parents do not have friends, so living with them can feel constraining, especially when they make assumptions about me.','',1632066879,131,0,''),(1400,'That\'s cool that your dad has an artistic outlet, but that does sound like a lonely process. It\'s painful to see adults who really don\'t have any friends. We live in a pretty isolating and individualist society, especially during Covid.','',1632067033,131,3,'Ruby'),(1401,'My parents didn\'t have friends before COVID either, so COVID just sort of emphasizes the lack of social interaction. My mom doesn\'t want me to dance with people until she gets a booster shot a few months from now, and my dad doesn\'t want me to go to concerts. I understand the fear, but it\'s difficult to limit myself to meet the desires of the people I live with.','',1632067375,131,0,''),(1402,'?That makes a lot of sense. Do you ever hope to live apart from them one day','',1632067473,131,3,'Ruby'),(1403,'Oops, I meant to put the. Question mark at the end, not the beginning.','',1632067484,131,3,'Ruby'),(1404,'Yes, I hope the novel I\'m writing will be the start of financial independence for me so I can live on my own, but I don\'t know for sure it will be. I have 4 chapters left, and I\'m trying to be true to the characters in the story as I get to the ending. I\'ve never written a novel before, and it\'s difficult for me to do because I feel a responsibility to write something of quality. I\'ve written screenplays and short stories before, but writing a novel is more difficult than those.','',1632067857,131,0,''),(1405,'It sounds really complicated and layered! I think a lot of people need to write multiple big pieces before feeling skilled at it.','',1632068211,131,3,'Ruby'),(1406,'It\'s not that I don\'t feel skilled at it, but I feel pressure to embrace the skill to the fullest extent I can, and that\'s a lot of pressure to feel when I\'m not getting paid to write anything. I would only write another novel in the future if someone paid me an advance beforehand because that\'s an incentive to do the best work I can. I don\'t have that incentive with this novel, so there\'s an element of trying to write something of quality while not knowing if anyone will actually care.','',1632068763,131,0,''),(1407,'Right, it seems like a passion project more than a business venture. I hope that you can get some attention from publishers, and maybe get paid an advance after the fact of being published! Sometimes that happens for folks.','',1632068846,131,3,'Ruby'),(1408,'Maybe. I try to tell the truth through the story I\'m writing, but I don\'t know if anyone will care. People in disability services make me confused about the truth, so the novel has been a way of trying to sort out the truth even though the truth ends up becoming fiction. It becomes a very subconscious process, like pretending to be other people or creating drawings. I\'ve never done something subconscious on this level. I didn\'t know where the story would go, and I just let it fall into place.','',1632069536,131,0,''),(1409,'It\'s a great exercise in powerlessness and letting go of control and seeing what comes up. Some folks will care, and others won\'t be interested. We can\'t always appeal to everybody.','',1632070737,131,3,'Ruby'),(1410,'Under my legal name, I don\'t seem to appeal to a lot of people. I hope the characters I create are more relatable. Are you looking forward to Autumn?','',1632070907,131,0,''),(1411,'I am looking forward to parts of it, but where I live the autumn and winter are pretty dreary and they can last a long time, so I\'m definitely going to miss the sunshine.','',1632071462,131,3,'Ruby'),(1412,'I hope you can create an inner sunshine for yourself by embracing being Rubytastic! Thank you for talking with me Ruby! I hope you have a good week.','',1632071647,131,0,''),(1413,'I hope you do too! Thanks for chatting today, Jason :)','',1632071738,131,3,'Ruby'),(1414,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1632072030,131,-1,'Ruby'),(1415,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632179410,130,-1,'Mo'),(1416,'Hello','',1632263602,132,0,''),(1417,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1632263622,132,-1,'Mo'),(1418,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat. What can I help with today?','',1632263640,132,4,'Mo'),(1419,'What is masturbation?','',1632263815,132,0,''),(1420,'I know we talked about this a few weeks ago, can you give me a sense of what information we didn\'t cover in that conversation that you\'d like to know?','',1632263926,132,4,'Mo'),(1421,'I\'m going to go ahead and close the chat; if you have further questions later, feel free to stop by.','',1632266299,132,4,'Mo'),(1422,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632266301,132,-1,'Mo'),(1423,'I have been diagnosed with HSV1. However I get it on my lady parts. My obgyn said the only way I can transmit it is orally. I was just wondering what your opinion is. I want to trust her but am just looking for a second opinion. And yes I do know protection is important regardless. But if I start to think about having a child with my future life partner I don’t want to put him at risk either.','',1632524065,133,0,''),(1424,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1632524111,133,-1,'Mo'),(1425,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1632524128,133,4,'Mo'),(1426,'I have to admit, I\'m not sure why your doctor said you could only transmit HSV1 orally. HSV1 is more commonly found in the mouth than in the genitals, but (as is the case with you,it sounds like) it can be in the genitals as well.','',1632524260,133,4,'Mo'),(1427,'We do have an article with some information about herpes here, which might be helpful to check out: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexual_health/the_sti_files_herpes If you do ever become pregnant that\'s something you\'ll want to talk with your doctor about, as it can be transmitted during vaginal birth, but there are steps you can take to make it much less risky for the baby.','',1632524390,133,4,'Mo'),(1428,'Oh, to clarify things, HSV 1 is usually transmitted through oral/oral contact but can also be transmitted through oral/genital contact. So oral sex could pass it on to someone else, but you\'re unlikely to transmit it through genital sex.','',1632524644,133,4,'Mo'),(1429,'It looks like you\'ve headed out and our chat hours are almost over for today but if you need help later, feel free to come on back another time. :)','',1632527523,133,4,'Mo'),(1430,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632527525,133,-1,'Mo'),(1431,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1632675129,134,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1432,'Hi.','',1632675129,134,0,''),(1433,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1632675142,134,-1,'Ruby'),(1434,'Hi jason!','',1632675148,134,3,'Ruby'),(1435,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1632675166,134,0,''),(1436,'I\'m doing all right! Having some breakfast and getting some stuff done here at Scarleteen. It\'s a rainy day here but I\'m feeling good. How are you doing','',1632675256,134,3,'Ruby'),(1437,'?','',1632675257,134,3,'Ruby'),(1438,'Ok. I was getting really depressed last week. The somatic therapist I\'m seeing told me she had a family emergency on Wednesday, so I didn\'t get to see her last week. The therapist I have in England as a British teenager is on leave right now too, so I didn\'t have anyone to be open with last week. I finished Chapter 12 of my book yesterday, and I\'ve felt better since then. I have 3 more chapters to right, and it feels difficult because I feel a responsibility to write a novel that\'s good.','',1632675696,134,0,''),(1439,'I have 3 more chapters to *write*...not \"right\"...that\'s a bad sign...I can\'t spell anymore apparently.','',1632675782,134,0,''),(1440,'It\'s hard to be sad when we don\'t have support! I\'m sorry about that. I hope you get to talk with your therapists soon. I\'m glad to hear that you\'re working on your project, that can be really helpful to keep us okay during difficult times.','',1632675928,134,3,'Ruby'),(1441,'It\'s difficult to write the novel because the inspiration for the novel was the way women treat me in disability services, but the novel becomes its own story. The novel feels like it writes itself, and I have to be there to see it through. Writing the novel becomes sort of like writing down a long dream because I don\'t feel like I\'m consciously creating the story. Like an actor, I have to be there to support the characters, and it could wear me down but I\'m hopeful the book will be good enough','',1632676519,134,0,''),(1442,'Right, even if it\'s fiction it\'s influenced by your life so it\'s in some ways autobiographical. sometimes it feels to me like doing creative and artistic things like that is a spiritual experience because we get to see what wants to come through us as a channel.','',1632676628,134,3,'Ruby'),(1443,'Yes, writing the novel feels like it brings me close to the world of dreams which seems a level below the world of ghosts, like attending a seance and allowing spirits to speak through me. Writing screenplays is easier because they exist more on the surface within the confines of a movie. This novel takes place in the future, and the main characters are women, so any autobiographical elements are buried deep within the story which I think encourages me to write the novel subconsciously.','',1632677101,134,0,''),(1444,'I\'m excited to see what other projects come through you in the future!','',1632677205,134,3,'Ruby'),(1445,'Yes, I hope other projects come through me too. This novel feels deeper than anything I\'ve written, and if I did a novel that was more autobiographical it could get very depressing, so if I write another novel I\'m not sure what it would be like. I\'m glad I\'ve been there for the characters so far. I would have liked it if people in real life had been there instead of me becoming other people in order to be acceptable. I\'m glad that you listen to me. What are you having for breakfast today?','',1632677571,134,0,''),(1446,'I do hope that you have more and more experiences of being accepted the way you are and accepting others the way they are. Your past can become an asset over time, even though it\'s been really painful to experience so far. Today i\'m having a kind of grilled cheese-egg sandwich combo with tomato and avocado!','',1632677719,134,3,'Ruby'),(1447,'I\'m not sure what is the real way I am, but I\'m glad you are responsive to me as Jason. I keep anticipating being raped in order to feel valid because I feel like a fake. I felt less hungry last week for some reason, and I haven\'t had anything to eat yet today. I\'ve exercised every day this year so far, and I try to prepare to become a stripper. It\'s confusing to know how to be an acceptable human being. There\'s more pressure on me to act in a certain way because I look masculine to others.','',1632678245,134,0,''),(1448,'We can all be changeable depending on who\'s in front of us, but I can see you developing a sense of your values, interests and needs even if you feel like you have no sense of self at all. You are acceptable just as you are right now without having to do anything or act a certain way.','',1632678776,134,3,'Ruby'),(1449,'Maybe. People in disability services make me feel like I need more disability services even though they often are unresponsive to me. It\'s difficult for me to hear people tell me what my needs are. Meanwhile, my cousin was ignored for years, he was abused, and I don\'t even know how he died. He was very vulnerable, he couldn\'t stand up for himself, and now everyone else can define him. That makes me sad. At least, I can focus on right now, so right now I will have something to eat like you are.','',1632679051,134,0,''),(1450,'I\'m glad you\'re going to take care of your body! There\'s so much to grieve in the world. It totally makes sense to feel sad about his situation and your situation.','',1632679109,134,3,'Ruby'),(1451,'Thank you for talking to me Ruby. I hope the grilled cheese was good with the tomato and avocado! I hope you have Rubytastic experiences this week!','',1632679171,134,0,''),(1452,'Thank you! I hope your breakfast/lunch is Jasonriffic!','',1632679192,134,3,'Ruby'),(1453,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1632679353,134,-1,'Ruby'),(1454,'Hii! Today in class i started getting some brownish discharge, but my period ended last monday, is this normal?','',1632776982,135,0,''),(1455,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1632777006,135,-1,'Mo'),(1456,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1632777045,135,4,'Mo'),(1457,'It\'s not unusual to notice some brownish discharge after the end of a period. Having a week of no discharge between the end of a period and that discharge isn\'t *as* common, but it isn\'t unheard of.','',1632777109,135,4,'Mo'),(1458,'Ohhhh okay','',1632777151,135,0,''),(1459,'My period was also mainly just brown, with the last 2 days having some actual blood-','',1632777176,135,0,''),(1460,'That\'s pretty common!','',1632777287,135,4,'Mo'),(1461,'oH- okay','',1632777312,135,0,''),(1462,'The brown color is usually older blood/tissue, so sometimes at the beginning or end of a period you\'ll notice that color. It\'s totally normal and not a sign of a problem.','',1632777354,135,4,'Mo'),(1463,'o okay, thank you!','',1632777374,135,0,''),(1464,'Have a great rest of your day/night!','',1632777388,135,0,''),(1465,'Thanks! You too. :)','',1632777399,135,4,'Mo'),(1466,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632777402,135,-1,'Mo'),(1467,'Is Mo available?','',1632870331,136,0,''),(1468,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1632870389,136,-1,'Mo'),(1469,'Hi there!','',1632870397,136,4,'Mo'),(1470,'Hi :)','',1632870414,136,0,''),(1471,'Is Mo available?','',1632870426,136,0,''),(1472,'Yes, this is Mo!','',1632870436,136,4,'Mo'),(1473,'oh hahaha','',1632870448,136,0,''),(1474,'hello :)','',1632870454,136,0,''),(1475,'You probably don\'t remember me, we talked years ago','',1632870489,136,0,''),(1476,'anyway,','',1632870493,136,0,''),(1477,'What can I help with today?','',1632870493,136,4,'Mo'),(1478,'Is being gender-fluid something real? I\'ve questions','',1632870526,136,0,''),(1479,'It is! I think there are a lot of ways to approach gender fluidity as a concept but it\'s certainly a real thing.','',1632870567,136,4,'Mo'),(1480,'I\'ve noticed that, while I am attracted mainly to males, I usually can\'t find a female that I think of as being \"cool\", and I was wondering:','',1632870610,136,0,''),(1481,'Is that internalized patriarchism or a symptom of gender-fuidity?','',1632870646,136,0,''),(1482,'*fluidity','',1632870659,136,0,''),(1483,'I\'m confused','',1632870699,136,0,''),(1484,'Hm! An interesting question. I generally think of gender fluidity as something related to a person\'s gender identity. Do these feelings you\'re having about men and women feel like they\'re related to your own feelings about your gender?','',1632870762,136,4,'Mo'),(1485,'yes, I think so','',1632870785,136,0,''),(1486,'I\'m female at birth','',1632870793,136,0,''),(1487,'and people would say that I act as a female most of the time (old ideas like talking to much or concetrating on the emotional side of things more often)','',1632870856,136,0,''),(1488,'which I think is crap','',1632870873,136,0,''),(1489,'but also... idk','',1632870881,136,0,''),(1490,'anyway, I feel okay in my body','',1632870908,136,0,''),(1491,'I don\'t think I\'m trans','',1632870918,136,0,''),(1492,'It can be tough when people tie their feelings about your gender to their own feelings about outdated gender roles.','',1632870922,136,4,'Mo'),(1493,'yeah, so I\'ve been pondering this issue','',1632870962,136,0,''),(1494,'at the end of the day, I feel okay with who I am, but','',1632870986,136,0,''),(1495,'from someone who feels attracted to males, is that the reason why I often find a lot of guys I think of as \"cool AF\",','',1632871067,136,0,''),(1496,'I mean, Lara Croft is cool','',1632871092,136,0,''),(1497,'idk','',1632871112,136,0,''),(1498,'fictional characters can be really cool...','',1632871155,136,0,''),(1499,'An extra complication, if you\'re talking about fictional characters, is that it\'s often easier to find male characters who are written with a lot of depth or given prominence in a narrative, so it can feel easier to be drawn to them.','',1632871163,136,4,'Mo'),(1500,'true that','',1632871181,136,0,''),(1501,'I think it is good to be aware of the ways we can all internalize misogyny but I don\'t think that has to be the only factor at play, here.','',1632871209,136,4,'Mo'),(1502,'when it comes to fictional characters... I read manga, and there\'s a group of mangakas (writers of manga) called CLAMP','',1632871282,136,0,''),(1503,'all their characters are cool, both female and male','',1632871298,136,0,''),(1504,'and it\'s confusing for me','',1632871312,136,0,''),(1505,'How so?','',1632871355,136,4,'Mo'),(1506,'It\'s like I look up to them all','',1632871380,136,0,''),(1507,'but IRL,','',1632871387,136,0,''),(1508,'I often look up to males','',1632871399,136,0,''),(1509,'daddy issues, anyone? haha','',1632871411,136,0,''),(1510,'misogyny?','',1632871444,136,0,''),(1511,'gender-fluidity?','',1632871450,136,0,''),(1512,'I\'m lost','',1632871459,136,0,''),(1513,'It\'s hard to know! I don\'t think it has to be one thing or the other. Some people do have a strong affinity for people of a particular gender and that isn\'t necessarily a sign that they have issues with people of other genders.','',1632871495,136,4,'Mo'),(1514,'oh, btw: some people would say I\'m not feminine though','',1632871498,136,0,''),(1515,'so I feel like an amoeba','',1632871531,136,0,''),(1516,'Do you agree with that? There are so many ways people can be or experience femininity that it\'s possible you\'re expressing it in a way they don\'t expect. Or you may not feel like it\'s something you feel or express at all.','',1632871560,136,4,'Mo'),(1517,'I don\'t feel body dysmorphia, but I sometimes I wonder \"What if I had a male body? Would things be different?\"','',1632871632,136,0,''),(1518,'That\'s understandable! I think a lot of people have moments of curiosity like that,no matter what their wider gender feelings are.','',1632871673,136,4,'Mo'),(1519,'yeah','',1632871683,136,0,''),(1520,'When it comes to gender fluidity, to circle back to that thought, the way I understand the concept is that it\'s tied to someone feeling like their gender identity is shifting or unfixed to some extent. Does that feel like something you experience?','',1632871717,136,4,'Mo'),(1521,'feminity and maculinity as concepts are shit','',1632871734,136,0,''),(1522,'but yeah...','',1632871744,136,0,''),(1523,'For some people that means \"my gender may change from one day to the next\" and for others it could be \"my gender has shifted gradually over time and is still changing.\"','',1632871748,136,4,'Mo'),(1524,'mmhh... then maybe it\'s a question of expression? I feel like \"I am me\" whatever that may be','',1632871812,136,0,''),(1525,'does it make sense?','',1632871847,136,0,''),(1526,'That\'s a totally valid way to feel! You may just want to sidestep the idea of assigning yourself a gender altogether.','',1632871861,136,4,'Mo'),(1527,'yep','',1632871870,136,0,''),(1528,'A-gender? gender non-conformist?','',1632871890,136,0,''),(1529,'what other names can it take?','',1632871903,136,0,''),(1530,'There are definitely a few ways you could describe that. Agender is one that might feel good, the people I know who identify that way have a very \"I do not want to participate in this gender business\" sort of attitude about it.','',1632871973,136,4,'Mo'),(1531,'\"Nonbinary\" is a huge umbrella term for a bunch of different types of gender identities, that can apply to anyone who doesn\'t feel exclusively male or female. That might feel like it applies to you.','',1632872025,136,4,'Mo'),(1532,'It\'s also absolutely fine to just feel how you feel and not put a specific name to it right now, if you don\'t want to or if none of them feel quite right.','',1632872048,136,4,'Mo'),(1533,'... (taking it all in)','',1632872092,136,0,''),(1534,'It can be a lot to take in! And gender is so nuanced and so personal that two people with the same gender identity won\'t necessarily see it the exact same way.','',1632872131,136,4,'Mo'),(1535,'can that be for life? it could shift too, I guess...','',1632872135,136,0,''),(1536,'Yeah! Any of these can be someone\'s fixed gender or something that people experience for a while before their gender feels like something different. Also, to complicate things further...','',1632872180,136,4,'Mo'),(1537,'hahaha \"to complicate things further...\"','',1632872206,136,0,''),(1538,'Hi, my gf and I have generally good sex, we both get off, but often it is quite short. She often want to go for a second round, but generally I kinda struggle to get in the mood and get another erection, am I normal? Thank you','',1632872211,137,0,''),(1539,'Someone might use a word like \"agender\" for a long time, and feel like that suits them the entire time while the specifics of their gender expression or identity might still change a little bit.','',1632872222,136,4,'Mo'),(1540,'like, how?','',1632872248,136,0,''),(1541,'Honestly I think it\'s really important to always remember that these are all general, imprecise words for very personal and hard -to-pin-down feelings and identities.','',1632872254,136,4,'Mo'),(1542,'I\'m trying to think of a good example, here. I know some people who are nonbinary , have been nonbinary for years and that identity hasn\'t changed, but they\'ve had some shifts in terms of their physical presentation or deciding to start or stop hormone treatments, that sort of thing. Their identity hasn\'t changed on a basic level but how they express it has, a little bit.','',1632872349,136,4,'Mo'),(1543,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1632872378,137,-1,'Mo'),(1544,'I see...','',1632872379,136,0,''),(1545,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1632872387,137,4,'Mo'),(1546,'\"I am me\" + \"the way I look could look gendered\"?','',1632872416,136,0,''),(1547,'What you\'re describing isn\'t unusual. Of course everyone is different and we don\'t want to generalize experiences too much, but it\'s pretty common for men to take a while to be interested in sex or have another erection after having an orgasm, and many women have a shorter refractory period (which is that \"recharging\" period) and are interested in continuing sexual activity after orgasm.','',1632872480,137,4,'Mo'),(1548,'I think that\'s a valid way to look at it, yeah!','',1632872500,136,4,'Mo'),(1549,'btw, can I tell you something that happened to me today? It\'s romantic related','',1632872543,136,0,''),(1550,'Sure!','',1632872562,136,4,'Mo'),(1551,'oh I see, I guess it makes sense then, it does seem to take me longer, but I  just wasn\'t sure if it was common or not','',1632872568,137,0,''),(1552,'Well, 3 years ago I met a guy and developed a HUGE crush on him','',1632872599,136,0,''),(1553,'we met for a very short period of time','',1632872618,136,0,''),(1554,'we talked through Facebook, but it was mainly me doing the talking','',1632872647,136,0,''),(1555,'(we met IRL)','',1632872657,136,0,''),(1556,'it ended weirdly, no comments about that','',1632872676,136,0,''),(1557,'Yep, it is pretty common! You might find that having sex that doesn\'t involve your penis, like oral or manual sex, is something you\'re still interested in after an orgasm, but if you have an orgasm and feel 100% done for the moment, that isn\'t unusual or a bad way to feel.','',1632872681,137,4,'Mo'),(1558,'but he blocked me','',1632872699,136,0,''),(1559,'and today I contacted his profile from a new profile (that I had to create for virtual classes and such)','',1632872750,136,0,''),(1560,'Yeah you are right, there is alternative. I will definitely consider that! well it really answers my question so thanks a lot :)','',1632872775,137,0,''),(1561,'and even after sending him a photo he didn\'t recognise me','',1632872776,136,0,''),(1562,'You\'re welcome! Anything else I can help with today?','',1632872800,137,4,'Mo'),(1563,'I didn\'t mention our previous chat and the fact that he blocked me (didn\'t think it would help my case)','',1632872813,136,0,''),(1564,'I\'m good thanks. Have a nice rest of the day!','',1632872838,137,0,''),(1565,'I wanted to be friends, but it seems it\'s a no go','',1632872842,136,0,''),(1566,'You too!','',1632872849,137,4,'Mo'),(1567,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632872853,137,-1,'Mo'),(1568,'and now I\'m like','',1632872894,136,0,''),(1569,'\"Well, maybe I\'ll contact him again in the future for some reason or another\"','',1632872922,136,0,''),(1570,'but it feels close to what freedom feels like','',1632872948,136,0,''),(1571,'\"Ah well, if he doesn\'t remember... then that\'s fine too\"','',1632872975,136,0,''),(1572,'but also a bit sad','',1632872999,136,0,''),(1573,'In general, once someone\'s blocked you I think it\'s best not to initiate contact in the future.','',1632872999,136,4,'Mo'),(1574,'Yeah, I imagine it would not feel great!','',1632873010,136,4,'Mo'),(1575,'no no, he blocked my previous profile 3 years ago','',1632873032,136,0,''),(1576,'but we talked just fine today, though it seems he doesn\'t see a friendship in the future','',1632873071,136,0,''),(1577,'Okay. It sounds like you don\'t think he realized you were the same person, though, unless I misunderstood that.','',1632873088,136,4,'Mo'),(1578,'Yep, and I didn\'t want to push the matter','',1632873110,136,0,''),(1579,'I\'m grateful that I met him','',1632873138,136,0,''),(1580,'Makes sense, yeah. But I think there\'s a limit to how much you can connect now, with that history.','',1632873149,136,4,'Mo'),(1581,'and now it feels a little bit like \"I\'ll go on with my life, I\'m glad that I met you, I\'m glad that you exist, I hope I\'ll find people like you in my future\"','',1632873209,136,0,''),(1582,'I think that\'s a good feeling to take away.','',1632873236,136,4,'Mo'),(1583,'I still feel some attachment','',1632873245,136,0,''),(1584,'lingering feelings','',1632873252,136,0,''),(1585,'but meeting him was like','',1632873265,136,0,''),(1586,'\"So there\'s someone like this on this planet\"','',1632873287,136,0,''),(1587,'I treasure that','',1632873297,136,0,''),(1588,'I hope I go on to meet more people I feel that way about','',1632873324,136,0,''),(1589,'I hope so too!','',1632873339,136,4,'Mo'),(1590,'but a bit sad, yeah :)','',1632873365,136,0,''),(1591,'Thanks Mo','',1632873400,136,0,''),(1592,'You\'re welcome!','',1632873408,136,4,'Mo'),(1593,'I think I\'m done, but before:','',1632873417,136,0,''),(1594,'you may not remember me, it was aeons ago but','',1632873435,136,0,''),(1595,'I really appreciate that you listened to me before AND now','',1632873453,136,0,''),(1596,'even when it fell a lil\' bit outside the themes we are allowed o talk about here','',1632873479,136,0,''),(1597,'I\'m glad I could help!!! I\'m really happy to be here chatting with folks. :)','',1632873503,136,4,'Mo'),(1598,'It\'s always great to hear that I\'ve been helpful, so thanks.','',1632873512,136,4,'Mo'),(1599,':) Thank YOU','',1632873527,136,0,''),(1600,'Wish you a nice weekend, and a nice life <3','',1632873560,136,0,''),(1601,'Thank you , the same to you!! Take care.','',1632873576,136,4,'Mo'),(1602,'bye bye','',1632873586,136,0,''),(1603,'[level=system-warning exit-visitor]Dana has closed the chat explicitly![/level] [button_action=send_manual_message]invite to chat[/button_action]','',1632873594,136,-1,''),(1604,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1632873605,136,-1,'Mo'),(1605,'I’m feel like he’s out of league.','',1633123813,138,0,''),(1606,'Hello?','',1633123861,138,0,''),(1607,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633123893,138,-1,'Mo'),(1608,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1633123903,138,4,'Mo'),(1609,'What can I help with today?','',1633123908,138,4,'Mo'),(1610,'So I just started to talking to this guy. I’m thinking that we could just hang out as friends first, but I want for it to eventually be more. But I feel like he’s out of my league and that I may not be good enough for him.','',1633124026,138,0,''),(1611,'Is there something in particular about yourself or the way the two of you interact that makes you feel that? Or is it just a general feeling you\'re having about him?','',1633124125,138,4,'Mo'),(1612,'No he’s very nice and we’ve been knowing each for a long time. The thing is he’s a very outgoing, popular person. And I’m just your average girl.','',1633125060,138,0,''),(1613,'Gotcha, thanks. :) I ask because I think it\'s good to remember that people have all sorts of different preferences when it comes to people they date. The most popular and outgoing people aren\'t necessarily the best partners for everyone! I don\'t think you can assume you\'ll know the sort of person he\'s attracted to.','',1633125194,138,4,'Mo'),(1614,'What I\'d recommend is to keep getting to know him, maybe ask if he wants to hang out or do some other activity that will help you connect a bit more, and see where things go. I absolutely sympathize with that feeling of \"oh no this person\'s way out of my league,\" and I\'ve felt that a LOT, but honestly when it comes down to it I think the concept of being out of someone\'s league isn\'t really kind or fair to anyone.','',1633125272,138,4,'Mo'),(1615,'You\'ve probably seen couples who seem really mismatched in terms of looks or personality who are really happy together, right? Some of that is because there\'s no objective \"best\" kind of partner. Someone who most people find attractive won\'t do it for everyone, and someone who\'s overlooked a lot may be deeply attractive to plenty of folks.','',1633125334,138,4,'Mo'),(1616,'Okay. And also how can I prepare to have a good and healthy relationship with him? I’ve only been involved with one other person and we argued a lot and now we don’t talk. I don’t the same this time around. Even if we do break up I want us to be on good terms.','',1633125481,138,0,''),(1617,'Let me grab some links for you, we have some good articles about relationships on our site.','',1633125503,138,4,'Mo'),(1618,'https://www.scarleteen.com/article/relationships/supermodel_creating_nurturing_your_own_best_relationship_models https://www.scarleteen.com/article/relationships/potholes_dead_ends_relationship_roadblocks_to_look_out_for &  https://www.scarleteen.com/article/abuse_assault/hello_sailor_how_to_build_board_and_navigate_a_healthy_relationship are three good articles to start with!','',1633125572,138,4,'Mo'),(1619,'Thank you. I just want things to go right and for this anxiety to go away.','',1633125633,138,0,''),(1620,'I\'m sorry you\'re feeling so much anxiety around this! Do you feel like you\'re dealing with a lot of anxiety in other areas of your life?','',1633125685,138,4,'Mo'),(1621,'Yes. My social life could be better. And I','',1633125746,138,0,''),(1622,'am a little discouraged about driving after failing my road test today.','',1633125780,138,0,''),(1623,'Oh,what a bummer. :( Hopefully you can retake that soon. Are you currently receiving any mental healthcare support, like from a counselor or therapist? Is that something you\'d like help accessing, if you don\'t have it right now?','',1633125846,138,4,'Mo'),(1624,'I see a therapist every other week','',1633125886,138,0,''),(1625,'Does your therapist feel like a good fit?','',1633125988,138,4,'Mo'),(1626,'Yes, I really like her.','',1633126032,138,0,''),(1627,'That\'s good! I\'m glad you have her as a resource.','',1633126065,138,4,'Mo'),(1628,'Thank you for talking with me. I feel a little better.','',1633126232,138,0,''),(1629,'Glad I could help! Is there anything else you\'d like to chat about today?','',1633126259,138,4,'Mo'),(1630,'No. That’s all.','',1633126286,138,0,''),(1631,'Okay! I hope you have a good rest of your day and a nice weekend. Thanks for using Scarleteen chat today, take care!','',1633126323,138,4,'Mo'),(1632,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633126429,138,-1,'Mo'),(1633,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1633273458,139,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1634,'Hi','',1633273458,139,0,''),(1635,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1633273471,139,-1,'Ruby'),(1636,'Good morning, Jason!','',1633273494,139,3,'Ruby'),(1637,'Hi Ruby. How are you?','',1633273515,139,0,''),(1638,'I\'m doing all right! Just trying to ride the waves of change, moving into fall, moving away from the place I\'ve lived the past few years. It\'s a lot to manage but all is well!','',1633273612,139,3,'Ruby'),(1639,'How are things for you?','',1633273615,139,3,'Ruby'),(1640,'Ok. I keep trying to repress the way people treat me and find new ways to communicate. I got a sketchbook and art materials to do a graphic novel after I finish the novel I\'m writing. I\'m not very good at drawing, but I started getting ideas of how to portray the way people treat me through comics, so I thought I would try doing a graphic novel. I don\'t expect that I could make money off of the graphic novel, although I am hoping the novel I\'m writing right now will help me make money.','',1633274056,139,0,''),(1641,'Hi Ruby, are you still here?','',1633274074,140,0,''),(1642,'I think exploring new ways to be creative is always a good idea, even if you don\'t feel \"good\" at it..! Taking safe risks like that is a good sign of being willing to grow and change in new ways.','',1633274145,139,3,'Ruby'),(1643,'My exercise teacher told me she is looking forward to seeing the final result of my novel, and she told me she would contact me if she knows of anyone looking for a stripper. I feel like overwhelming myself with people who want me to entertain them with my body is a way of trying not to feel physically overwhelmed by the way people treat me. I keep anticipating being raped as a way to validate myself.','',1633274498,139,0,''),(1644,'You\'ve said that about being raped the past few weeks- do you want to tell me more about what that experience holds for you in your mind? Or why that would be validating?','',1633275084,139,3,'Ruby'),(1645,'The lawyer I had asked me if I even knew what trauma is like being friggin\' raped. The unit supervisor at the disability services thinks I\'m an asshole, and I don\'t know how to be an acceptable disabled person. I try to imagine that being raped is a way of becoming acceptable. The somatic therapist asked me to draw a self-portrait of myself, so I drew a self-portrait of someone about to rape me. I don\'t know who I am as a disabled person, so I try to be someone that could be acceptable.','',1633275413,139,0,''),(1646,'I understand attaching to a really violating thing as a way to make sense of the trauma you are experiencing in your experience with disability services and in the legal system, the trauma you\'ve experienced in other situations throughout your life. Many people wouldn\'t view that as true trauma, although I think it\'s certainly made an impact on how you interact with the world. Maybe there\'s a part of you that thinks if you experienced something like being raped, then people would take your trauma seriously?','',1633276553,139,3,'Ruby'),(1647,'Ruby has accepted the chat!','',1633276564,140,-1,'Ruby'),(1648,'Sanya! Hi! I am, but we have a new chat system that I\'m still getting used to so I didn\'t see your chat until now.','',1633276580,140,3,'Ruby'),(1649,'Are you still here?','',1633276583,140,3,'Ruby'),(1650,'I don\'t know how to be real, so I just start creating alternate realities to live in. I asked my dad if he would rape me weeks ago, but he didn\'t rape me. I just try to become different people. This afternoon I have an appointment with therapist in England as a British teenager, so I\'ll talk to her about things too. The lawyer I had told me I was using being different people, that I was smarter than that, but I don\'t understand what he means. I don\'t know how I would survive being one person.','',1633277149,139,0,''),(1651,'Maybe he means that legally, pretending to be different people can be a potentially risky experience because when we interact with others as different people- like when you emailed someone from the disability services talking about what an asshole you were, and she responded as if you were that person- it can actually be a very big deal in terms of legal fraud, and it can be a generally violating thing to do to someone, to be dishonest with them in that way. I understand that you\'re trying to make sense of the world, but maybe the lawyer was trying to warn against impersonation as an effective way to make sense of things since it could harm you more down the road.','',1633277536,139,3,'Ruby'),(1652,'Yup','',1633277694,140,0,''),(1653,'I\'m on mobile though so I may disconnect randomly accidentally','',1633277738,140,0,''),(1654,'I hadn\'t pretended to be anyone telling them I was an asshole yet when the lawyer told me this. The lawyer told me this, and then I wrote to different people under my legal name to try to describe how bad I was feeling. No one responded to me, and then the Deputy General Counsel at the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission broke two HIPAA laws with me. After that, I pretended to be people calling myself an asshole because that\'s a way I could get through to people.','',1633277835,139,0,''),(1655,'How do I figure out if I am a trans guy or simply non-binary?','',1633278093,141,0,''),(1656,'Right. I understand that you\'re trying to feel heard by people who have, for a long time, not responded to you in a humanizing way. I hear your confusion and struggle to figure out how to cope with that reality and how violating that has felt. Do you feel like there\'s been any acceptance in your system that things have happened, and been very confusing and frustrating, and that you can start the process of letting go of that experience rather than holding onto it?','',1633278214,139,3,'Ruby'),(1657,'Okay!','',1633278217,140,3,'Ruby'),(1658,'How are things?','',1633278219,140,3,'Ruby'),(1659,'Is anyone there?','',1633278266,141,0,''),(1660,'Bad tbh, as usual though. I didn\'t come with anything in particular today. It\'s more like finally I was able to talk to you (i.e. woke up early enough and had enough energy to talk) and wanted to check if you still work here.','',1633278395,140,0,''),(1661,'I do! I\'m sorry to hear things aren\'t feeling good these days.','',1633278423,140,3,'Ruby'),(1662,'No, my mind works like a robot, and my focus expands and intensifies over time. When people hurt me, it makes my focus stronger, and I start acting out the personality traits of other people. Maybe if I go to prison for fraud, then I can get raped.','',1633278423,139,0,''),(1663,'I have also sent you an email ages ago, to the Scarleteen address you asked me to use, and you haven\'t answered so I had my doubts if you still work here. But I\'m glad you do.','',1633278523,140,0,''),(1664,'I\'m still so tired though and I\'m angry that yet again I can\'t talk about anything for real because I barely can keep my eyes open and that\'s unfortunately not an exaggeration. That\'s why I\'m on mobile.','',1633278659,140,0,''),(1665,'I\'m sorry, I don\'t check that email often because we don\'t do direct services over email but I\'m glad you are here! It\'s understandable to feel frustrated that you\'re so tired. I hope you are able to be gentle with yourself and let yourself rest when your body needs to.','',1633278993,140,3,'Ruby'),(1666,'Maybe, but I\'m more interested in the archetype of that or the symbolism of it, and what that represents to you and what need is trying to be fulfilled through that theoretical experience rather than it actually being put into practic.e','',1633279060,139,3,'Ruby'),(1667,'Practice.','',1633279062,139,3,'Ruby'),(1668,'Yes, I basically don\'t feel safe. It said we lost connection for awhile, so I thought maybe you had abandoned me. Thank you for not abandoning me.','',1633280761,139,0,''),(1669,'Unfortunately not, this fatigue is looking me. But it doesn\'t matter now. I gave to go because I am too tired. I\'m glad you\'re still here though, very glad tbh.','',1633280856,140,0,''),(1670,'I\'ll let you know if I ever need to step back from our conversations or if I plan to step away from Scarleteen in general.','',1633280860,139,3,'Ruby'),(1671,'Take care and have a nice week :)','',1633280868,140,0,''),(1672,'Thanks Sanya! Good to hear from you!','',1633280935,140,3,'Ruby'),(1673,'When I am my legal name, people in disability services just abandon me. I probably sound very strange when I talk about the way people become part of who I am. I feel sad that I have to say that my mind works like a robot in order to be understood. If I drank alcohol or took drugs, maybe I would seem more acceptable. I don\'t know how to be acceptable for people because they act like I\'m supposed to act in a certain way. I just want to be violated to be acceptable.','',1633281146,139,0,''),(1674,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1633281651,140,-1,'Ruby'),(1675,'It makes sense to feel sad. It seems like you\'re seeking out a way to be validated in your suffering- like maybe if you were suffering in a more typical or relatable way to other people, then you would feel seen or supported. I think there are other less harmful ways to find that support. I understand that what you really want is community, acceptance, love, understanding, empathy... That completely makes sense!','',1633281725,139,3,'Ruby'),(1676,'If committing fraud is a way to get people to respond to me, then I guess that\'s what I\'ll do. People in disability services have disregarded me for years, and lied to me multiple times. I\'ve tried to work against dishonesty with honesty, but people keep treating me in contradictory ways. If I was honest, then I wouldn\'t be talking to you because I\'m not even a teenager. Being a fraud is how I\'ve been able to survive.','',1633281956,139,0,''),(1677,'I hear you. You were honest with me after you felt safe enough to be. I think this is a question of values- sometimes we\'re given an opportunity to decide if we value honesty even if we don\'t get what we want, or if we value control more than honesty. There\'s no right or wrong when it comes to this, but there is a greater question of how you might want to be treated by others in relationship. If you value others being honest with you, and if you know that you are able to be honest when safety is present, maybe focusing more on building safety through honesty will lead to fulfilling relationships rather than getting answers through dishonesty which can lead to shaky ground in relationship.','',1633282828,139,3,'Ruby'),(1678,'It\'s difficult to be honest even with myself because I\'ve been diagnosed with ADHD, autism, bipolar disorder, depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, separation anxiety disorder, schizophrenia and Tourette\'s. I don\'t know where the honesty is with me. I try to become different people, and if I can get people to take me seriously if I become someone portraying me as an asshole, then maybe that\'s the real me. I know I like youbecause you try to be real.','',1633283095,139,0,''),(1679,'I understand that we all have lots and lots of different parts that can come out and run our lives in different circumstances. I think you have a very strong protector part who\'s been trying to protect you in many different ways throughout your life. That makes sense if confusion and a lack of safety has been a theme in your life.','',1633283167,139,3,'Ruby'),(1680,'I think some of that confusion and lack of safety comes out in the novel I\'m writing. I hope the novel will be worthwhile in the end, not just for me, but for others as well. I hope that you continue to be real this week Ruby, and I hope moving away from the place you\'ve lived brings you great opportunities!','',1633283382,139,0,''),(1681,'Thank you so much! I hope you are gentle with yourself this week.','',1633283683,139,3,'Ruby'),(1682,'Ruby has closed the chat!','',1633283891,139,-1,'Ruby'),(1683,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633384058,141,-1,'Mo'),(1684,'Hi there, sorry no one was around to answer your chat yesterday! If you happen to still be around I\'d be happy to talk with you about this.','',1633384111,141,4,'Mo'),(1685,'am i too young to get fingered?','',1633385384,142,0,''),(1686,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633385405,142,-1,'Mo'),(1687,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1633385420,142,4,'Mo'),(1688,'hi','',1633385440,142,0,''),(1689,'Whether someone\'s ready to have any kind of sex can be more complicated than just age, but that can be part of it. Can you tell me how old you are (how old your partner is too, if you currently have one), and a little bit about your current situation?','',1633385479,142,4,'Mo'),(1690,'so im 13 and rly like this boy thats the same age and sometimes we kiss','',1633385555,142,0,''),(1691,'Okay. And have you been talking about fingering or other things you\'re both interested in? Or is it something you\'ve been thinking about but haven\'t talked with him about yet?','',1633385665,142,4,'Mo'),(1692,'we talk about it sometimes and i rly wanna do it with him','',1633385784,142,0,''),(1693,'i get like rly wet when we talk about it','',1633385802,142,0,''),(1694,'We have an article on our site that I think is a pretty good approach to thinking about sexual readiness: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/relationships/ready_or_not_the_scarleteen_sex_readiness_checklist','',1633385899,142,4,'Mo'),(1695,'Not everything on this checklist will apply, since some of it is about things like preventing pregnancy, but it may be helpful to share this with him and talk about it together.','',1633385923,142,4,'Mo'),(1696,'oh cool','',1633386032,142,0,''),(1697,'so sometimes he rubs me there over my leggings when we kiss','',1633386053,142,0,''),(1698,'I do want to say, though, that it can be risky to engage in sexual behavior at your age; many people do not have access to much in the way of privacy and consequences can be more intense if adults in your life who do not want you to be sexual find out about it. Also, while prosecution isn\'t super common, age of consent laws do apply when both people are under the age of consent.','',1633386062,142,4,'Mo'),(1699,'It is something to keep in mind, that sexual activity is likely unlawful between the two of you. That may not be something that comes up but there are times when the parent of one person might try and take legal action against the other.','',1633386096,142,4,'Mo'),(1700,'oh so i might get in big trouble with my mom?','',1633386139,142,0,''),(1701,'I\'m going to go ahead and close this chat out now, since it looks like you aren\'t around, but please come back another time if you\'d like to discuss this! :)','',1633386154,141,4,'Mo'),(1702,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633386159,141,-1,'Mo'),(1703,'It depends on your relationship with your mom and how she feels about you engaging in sexual activity with someone else, but it is possible, yes.','',1633386192,142,4,'Mo'),(1704,'i just like dont wanna get a spanking or something','',1633386270,142,0,''),(1705,'Do you and your mom ever talk about things like sex or relationships? Do you have a sense of what she\'s comfortable with?','',1633386311,142,4,'Mo'),(1706,'not rly but like shed prolly be mad','',1633386379,142,0,''),(1707,'she kinda treats me little','',1633386400,142,0,''),(1708,'That\'s something to take into consideration, then. It could be that being more physically intimate right now may be more risky than you\'d like it to be.','',1633386466,142,4,'Mo'),(1709,'think id get a spanking?','',1633386507,142,0,''),(1710,'I really couldn\'t say! That\'s going to depend on your mom, what her feelings about the situation are, and how she reacts.','',1633386548,142,4,'Mo'),(1711,'thats like the big punishment for her','',1633386587,142,0,''),(1712,'Is it safe to use vegetable oil or olive oil for lubricant?','',1633386601,143,0,''),(1713,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633386616,143,-1,'Mo'),(1714,'cant believe i still get it tbh','',1633386618,142,0,''),(1715,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat.','',1633386628,143,4,'Mo'),(1716,'Hello','',1633386638,143,0,''),(1717,'It\'s definitely not safe to use any sort of oil as a lubricant if you\'re also using condoms, as oil can cause condoms to break. In general, oil can be used but is often difficult to clean up and some folks find that it causes irritation.','',1633386700,143,4,'Mo'),(1718,'Do you feel like that\'s something you could talk with her about, if you\'re uncomfortable with spanking as a punishment?','',1633386724,142,4,'Mo'),(1719,'In general, we\'d advice that people not use oil as a lubricant if they\'re able to get hold of other options that will be safer and more effective.','',1633386757,143,4,'Mo'),(1720,'she just said then i shouldnt get in trouble','',1633386786,142,0,''),(1721,'you ever get them?','',1633386799,142,0,''),(1722,'Well, I wouldn\'t be using it for penetrative sex. I wanted to try masturbation with a lubricant.','',1633386854,143,0,''),(1723,'I\'d rather not talk about my own experiences here, if that\'s all right. So, it sounds like your mom\'s disapproval is something you\'d need to consider seriously when thinking about what you might want to do with this guy you\'re seeing.','',1633386877,142,4,'Mo'),(1724,'Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1633386888,142,4,'Mo'),(1725,'so like is the orgasm better when you get fingered?','',1633386931,142,0,''),(1726,'You may find that something like an unscented lotion is easier to use (and certainly less messy) but you could try some oil if you want. Do keep in mind that it can be tough to wash out of a lot of fabrics.','',1633386953,143,4,'Mo'),(1727,'How an orgasm feels is going to depend on a lot of factors! The kind of sex that\'s happening can be one of those factors, but orgasm is about your state of mind, how comfortable/relaxed/aroused you are, exactly how your partner\'s touching you, even things like where you are in your menstrual cycle can impact things.  Let me grab a link with some more information for you.','',1633387036,142,4,'Mo'),(1728,'Here you go: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/sexual_response_orgasm_a_users_guide This is a lot of information on orgasm and sexual response in general.','',1633387058,142,4,'Mo'),(1729,'Okay. I thought lotion would be dangerous to put on a penis. I thought would cause an infection','',1633387148,143,0,''),(1730,'oh cool','',1633387149,142,0,''),(1731,'i try to see how i can make it diff when i finger myself','',1633387169,142,0,''),(1732,'An unscented lotion, especially one that\'s marketed for sensitive skin, will be fine for external use.','',1633387224,143,4,'Mo'),(1733,'It definitely takes some time and experimentation to figure out what feels best during sex, whether that\'s with a partner or when masturbating.','',1633387274,142,4,'Mo'),(1734,'Okay, thank you.','',1633387494,143,0,''),(1735,'You\'re welcome! Anything else I can help with today?','',1633387544,143,4,'Mo'),(1736,'Is is possible to tell if a person has an std? I want to try hooking up, but don\'t want to get an std.','',1633387748,143,0,''),(1737,'It\'s definitely a good idea to be careful around this! Since many STDs/STIs are asymptomatic at times, they aren\'t something you can just look for. We recommend using safer sex practices with all partners and getting tested regularly; we have a great guide to safer sex here for more info on that: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/safe_sound_sexy_a_safer_sex_howto','',1633387898,143,4,'Mo'),(1738,'Okay. Thank you for the link. I will read it. Just one question first. Would it be safe to give a bj if the guy was wearing a condom, and I was careful not to get anything in my mouth?','',1633388099,143,0,''),(1739,'That\'s what we\'d recommend, yes. As we mention in that article, there\'s no way to 100% eliminate any risk of STI transmission during sex, but condom use cuts that risk down significantly. We\'d definitely recommend using condoms for oral sex with casual partners.','',1633388187,143,4,'Mo'),(1740,'Okay. And are dental dams for oral sex on a woman I assume.','',1633388358,143,0,''),(1741,'They can be used for oral sex involving a vulva or someone\'s anus.','',1633388413,143,4,'Mo'),(1742,'Well, right now I\'m not interested in performing oral sex on an anus, or getting it. But I will keep it in mind.','',1633388551,143,0,''),(1743,'You have that info just in case! :) Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1633388632,143,4,'Mo'),(1744,'Is dry humping or lap dances safe as far as pregnancy?','',1633388844,143,0,''),(1745,'I don\'t know if it is possible to orgasm from it','',1633388878,143,0,''),(1746,'We have a great article that goes into what can and can not cause pregnancy here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/can_i_get_pregnant_or_get_or_pass_on_an_sti_from_that Some very specific conditions need to be met for there to be a risk of pregnancy, and during a lap dance or dry humping, when at least one person has clothes on, those conditions cannot be met.','',1633388960,143,4,'Mo'),(1747,'Okay. Thanks. I figure we would have on underwear.','',1633389083,143,0,''),(1748,'I would like to get one from a girl, but I think would like to give one to a guy too. I guess I am bi.','',1633389140,143,0,''),(1749,'That makes sense to me! I think it\'s great that you know that about yourself.','',1633389245,143,4,'Mo'),(1750,'Well, I know I am only romantically  interested in girls, but I want to try some things with guys in there early 20s. Close to my age. I am not romantically interested in guys though.','',1633389493,143,0,''),(1751,'I think some femboys can be sexy too.','',1633389527,143,0,''),(1752,'That makes sense! It isn\'t uncommon to have different types of attraction for folks of different genders.','',1633389710,143,4,'Mo'),(1753,'Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1633389717,143,4,'Mo'),(1754,'Do you think it is dangerous to hookup now with covid still around, even in areas with low cases?','',1633389900,143,0,''),(1755,'Can it spread through sex?','',1633389924,143,0,''),(1756,'Covid isn\'t sexually transmitted, but as it\'s transmitted through respiratory droplets, if someone has covid their sexual partner would be at risk, yes. If everyone involved is fully vaccinated and is practicing safe behaviors in their daily lives (masking, distancing, etc.) then the risk will be lower; it\'s really up to what individuals feel comfortable with.','',1633389998,143,4,'Mo'),(1757,'Okay. Well at least it isn\'t sexually transmitted.','',1633390137,143,0,''),(1758,'Not through sexual fluids! But kissing and being unmasked in the same space would be a risk.','',1633390192,143,4,'Mo'),(1759,'Oh yeah. I mean through sexual fluids.','',1633390352,143,0,''),(1760,'Well, thank you for your help.','',1633390692,143,0,''),(1761,'You\'re quite welcome! Glad I could be helpful.','',1633390735,143,4,'Mo'),(1762,'Oh, do you have time for one more question?','',1633390837,143,0,''),(1763,'I do! We\'re near the end of our chat hours for today but I still have a few minutes.','',1633390903,143,4,'Mo'),(1764,'Okay. What does it mean to be pansexual?','',1633391083,143,0,''),(1765,'As with any sexual orientation, different pansexual people might have slightly different ways of describing it, but in general it means that someone\'s attracted to people of all genders','',1633391188,143,4,'Mo'),(1766,'There\'s a lot of overlap between bisexual and pansexual identities; many people find that both of those terms fit themselves although of course many people do identify with one and not the other.','',1633391219,143,4,'Mo'),(1767,'And what are the genders? I am used to it being used like sex.','',1633391340,143,0,''),(1768,'Describing male and female.','',1633391362,143,0,''),(1769,'Even when it comes to sex, there are more biological sexes than male and female! But in terms of gender, there are men, women, and a pretty big spectrum of folks who identify somewhere outside of that framework. Everyone who isn\'t a man or a woman will have a pretty personal and unique understanding of what that means; it isn\'t that  there\'s a secret third gender but more that there\'s a pretty big universe of genders and that \"man\" and \"woman\" are the ones people have the clearest framework for right now, if that makes sense.','',1633391479,143,4,'Mo'),(1770,'So, like men, women, intersex, transmen, transwomen, androgynous,','',1633391693,143,0,''),(1771,'Boys that dress like girls with stockings and dresses and look pretty but aren\'t transwomen','',1633391752,143,0,''),(1772,'I wouldn\'t break things down that way; it isn\'t that trans men, for example, are inherently a different gender than cis men.','',1633391765,143,4,'Mo'),(1773,'In all honesty, I think trying to impose a category on large groups of people when you don\'t know what their identity is something to avoid doing.','',1633391810,143,4,'Mo'),(1774,'Okay.','',1633391850,143,0,''),(1775,'I am just trying to figure out if I am bisexual or pansexual because I am attracted to women, some young guys, but also feminine looking guys. I saw some transgender people that I thought were sexy too.','',1633392018,143,0,''),(1776,'A lot of bisexual people are also attracted to people of multiple genders! So I think it would be fine to use either of those terms, or both, or whatever works for you.','',1633392056,143,4,'Mo'),(1777,'Okay. Thank you 😊','',1633392092,143,0,''),(1778,'I do need to head out as we\'re at the end of our chat hours for today, but if you have further questions I\'d be happy to continue the conversation another day.','',1633392105,143,4,'Mo'),(1779,'Okay. Good night.','',1633392137,143,0,''),(1780,'Take care! Thanks for using our chat service today.','',1633392153,143,4,'Mo'),(1781,'I am on the east cost','',1633392156,143,0,''),(1782,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633392201,143,-1,'Mo'),(1783,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633467586,142,-1,'Mo'),(1784,'i share a room with my sister, is it bad to finger at bedtime if she doesn’t know?','',1633474237,144,0,''),(1785,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633474276,144,-1,'Mo'),(1786,'Hi there, welcome back!','',1633474349,144,4,'Mo'),(1787,'This is a really tricky question for people who share a room with someone else. In general, I think it\'s going to be best to masturbate when you are alone, since it can be hard to know if someone else is actually asleep or knows what\'s going on or not and it\'s an uncomfortable position to put someone else in.','',1633474409,144,4,'Mo'),(1788,'but i share the room so its hard to be alone','',1633474445,144,0,''),(1789,'Is your sister older than you, or younger?','',1633474469,144,4,'Mo'),(1790,'Our chat service is currently online! Click here if you\'d like to start a chat!','',1633476402,145,-2,'Scarleteen'),(1791,'I have a question for an adult if anybody is on.','',1633476402,145,0,''),(1792,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633476434,145,-1,'Mo'),(1793,'Hi there, welcome to Scarleteen chat! What can I help with today?','',1633476450,145,4,'Mo'),(1794,'Do you think an age difference of three years is okay? I am 16, she is 13, we are both girls, but I\'m hesitant to do anything more with her. Would I be in any kind of trouble if she said anything?','',1633476517,145,0,''),(1795,'I think it\'s hard to make a blanket statement about whether an age gap like this is always okay or not okay, but I do think it\'s something to be very cautious about. In terms of being in trouble for the relationship, given your ages you may be running afoul of statutory rape laws if you\'re sexually active, although that will depend on the state, and in some areas it\'s rare for authorities to pursue anything when both parties are underage.','',1633476695,145,4,'Mo'),(1796,'Are the two of you currently involved? Is this something you\'re considering?','',1633476761,145,4,'Mo'),(1797,'We became sexually active on Saturday but it\'s all been my idea and she is only curious about it, I don\'t know if it\'s going to happen again, but after everything was done I was a little worried that maybe what I did was wrong. She was okay with everything that I did, but I think she\'s even having second thoughts. I think with both of us being girls that everything would be okay, but I don\'t know.','',1633476889,145,0,''),(1798,'I would be very very cautious about initiating sex again; I wouldn\'t do it at all without a lot of discussion firsthand. It can be very easy for a younger partner to go along with sexual activity that they may not feel entirely ready for when an older partner suggests it; that\'s part of what is so tricky about an age gap. If you\'re feeling worried about it, I think that is a sign to take a break from being sexual with her.','',1633477013,145,4,'Mo'),(1799,'Sexual dynamics can indeed be different between two girls, but consent is still just as vital no matter who it is that\'s having sex.','',1633477048,145,4,'Mo'),(1800,'I\'m going to give you a link to a pretty comprehensive article about consent on our site; I think it would be good to take a look at it and think about how what happened did or didn\'t align with what\'s discussed there. Http://www.scarleteen.com/article/abuse_assault/drivers_ed_for_the_sexual_superhighway_navigating_consent','',1633477116,145,4,'Mo'),(1801,'Thank you for the answer is, and I will read that. I was 13 when I had my first sexual experience, the girl was 17, I was okay with it. But I we\'ll back off and just stay friends, unless she says otherwise or something.','',1633477275,145,0,''),(1802,'That sounds good. She may want to talk about the experience you had this weekend, and she may not, so if it\'s something you\'re opening to discussing further, or checking in to see how she\'s feeling about it, that could be worth doing too.','',1633477361,145,4,'Mo'),(1803,'I am good friends with her older brother, I see her quite often, and I\'ll be keeping my ears open if she needs to talk. But I\'ll stay away from anything sexual for now or maybe 4ever','',1633477441,145,0,''),(1804,'That all sounds good, I think. Is there anything else I can help with today?','',1633477526,145,4,'Mo'),(1805,'Not as of right now. I\'ll join the boards on here in a little while though. Thank you for the answers.','',1633477585,145,0,''),(1806,'You\'re welcome! Take care, I hope you have a great rest of your day.','',1633477641,145,4,'Mo'),(1807,'Same 2 u','',1633477660,145,0,''),(1808,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633477699,145,-1,'Mo'),(1809,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633477702,144,-1,'Mo'),(1810,'its hard to find privacy to finger','',1633731505,146,0,''),(1811,'Mo has accepted the chat!','',1633731538,146,-1,'Mo'),(1812,'Hi there Lexi, welcome back.','',1633731556,146,4,'Mo'),(1813,'I think you mentioned in an earlier chat that you share a bedroom and that makes privacy difficult, is that right?','',1633731613,146,4,'Mo'),(1814,'yeah','',1633731641,146,0,''),(1815,'plus like i try to do it in the shower but like mom or my sister always walk in cause we only got one bathroom','',1633731677,146,0,''),(1816,'That does make it tough! I wonder if you\'d be able to talk to your sister about giving each other some time for privacy in the room, so that it\'s a conversation about giving each other space and not just you asking for it for yourself.','',1633731779,146,4,'Mo'),(1817,'You don\'t have to say it\'s for masturbation, but you might say you just want some time to yourself and you\'re willing to give her the same if you can work out a way to set aside that time for each other.','',1633731817,146,4,'Mo'),(1818,'yeah i can try that ig but she might just keep asking why','',1633731884,146,0,''),(1819,'she like never wants time alone','',1633731897,146,0,''),(1820,'It might be worth a try, at least. Is she older or younger than you?','',1633731939,146,4,'Mo'),(1821,'younger','',1633731976,146,0,''),(1822,'my friend said i should try doing it when i poop lol','',1633731998,146,0,''),(1823,'is that weird?','',1633732008,146,0,''),(1824,'Some people do use time in the restroom to masturbate, since it\'s a time they have for privacy.','',1633732034,146,4,'Mo'),(1825,'should i finger when the poop comes out? sry im not rly sure lol','',1633732120,146,0,''),(1826,'It\'s really up to what you want to do! There\'s no \"right\" way to masturbate, so if you would like to do that then you can.','',1633732153,146,4,'Mo'),(1827,'oh cool sometimes i think about stuff going in my butt tbh lol','',1633732234,146,0,''),(1828,'just thought i was weird','',1633732249,146,0,''),(1829,'Really when it comes to masturbation, learning what you like and what\'s comfortable to you is a process. That\'s normal.','',1633732342,146,4,'Mo'),(1830,'yeah and like i rly wanna do it in my bed at bedtime cause i like to fall asleep after','',1633732411,146,0,''),(1831,'Yeah, that\'s tough. In general it isn\'t ideal to masturbate when someone else is around unless you *know* for sure they are asleep because that can be uncomfortable for everyone, otherwise.','',1633732546,146,4,'Mo'),(1832,'what if i like talk to her about it and like see if she does it yet','',1633732609,146,0,''),(1833,'How old is she?','',1633732626,146,4,'Mo'),(1834,'11','',1633732703,146,0,''),(1835,'Ok. That\'s an age where I think you could have a conversation about this. It might help to start with a more general conversation about puberty or sexuality to gauge how comfortable she is discussing any of this. If she\'s very uncomfortable or reluctant to discuss this with you then I would pull back a bit.','',1633732788,146,4,'Mo'),(1836,'k so how should i go about it then','',1633732821,146,0,''),(1837,'like what should i say first','',1633732882,146,0,''),(1838,'Sometimes it helps if there\'s something happening in your daily life that you can pull a larger conversation from. So if topics about dating or sex or sexuality come up, that\'s something you could start a conversation from, either then or by mentioning it later.','',1633733025,146,4,'Mo'),(1839,'I do think, too, that if you want to just start by saying \"hey, I would like some private time sometimes, can we work out a few times a week when I have the room for an hour\" that might be a good thing to try first.','',1633733084,146,4,'Mo'),(1840,'yeah ill think about how to do it','',1633733119,146,0,''),(1841,'might be cool if she was ok doing it at bedtime','',1633733132,146,0,''),(1842,'maybe she already does lol','',1633733144,146,0,''),(1843,'She might! Plenty of people masturbate as children.','',1633733173,146,4,'Mo'),(1844,'Mo has closed the chat!','',1633737700,146,-1,'Mo');

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